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  1. #21
    God Leggo's Avatar
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    LMFAO!!!! fookin quality sammy & keV. Really funny... Lmao at the mushroom in a fur Forrest! Hahaha!

    Brilliant work my friend!!!

    LEGGOD!

  2. #22
    Black Ninja! Tommy Thunder's Avatar
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    Hahaha!! Brilliant stuff!! Very good read!!
    Want to join EWN's original e-fed? Join EWNCW NOW!
    Want details? Just ask me!


  3. #23
    T1CG: Oh this video inspires me tonight!! *sighs* So many things to put in boxes but only one really matters.. It's my grandmother's favorite gift from me, I give it to her every gift giving holiday.. She plays darts with the contents inside, and boy does a bullseye feel AMAZING!! I love it!! Now let's get to our next interview on location at JBW Corporate Headquarters with JBW Warfare General Manager and former EWNCW World champion, Mr. Manabu Nanahara!! ROLL THE TAPE!!

    *We are in a plushed out general manager's office over at JBW corporate headquarters.. Mr. Manabu Nanahara is sitting behind his desk dressed in a sharp suit.. That One Creepy Guy is sitting across from him and he can't wait to start the show*

    T1CG: Hello everyone!! Its That One Creepy Guy again *waves at camera*, I am so excited to be here at JBW corporate headquarters with Warfare's GM, Mr. Manabu Nanahara *claps hands softly* Yay!! Now im pretty big on Japanese culture especially the bukkake films and child trade.. Its quite amazing when you combine the two.. Excuse me Mr. Nanahara, this is about you and not me, I apologize.. Welcome to the show *wipes snot from nose*..

    Manabu: *Manabu rejects the handshake* Don't spread anymore diseases and do not dare patronize me! I dont want to hear about your disgusting diseased fetish stories, lets just do the interview.

    T1CG: *smiles at Manabu* I am quite diseased and I know you are a former EWNCW Heavyweight Champion and now General Manager of JBW Warfare.. I must have to ask this since you've been on both sides, which federation leaves the most stool?? You know like poops in the toilet.. The kind you play with as boats, except not the wet kind of poops, those are my favorite kind and I treat them as the life breath in the sea of my toilet.. But back to my main question.. EWNCW or JBW, who's doodoo production is so massive I can build a new studio inside it??

    Manabu: *Manabu stares menacingly at T1CG* is this a joke? did my agent actually book this? you're sat with one of the most brutal wrestlers in the world and you're talking about poo... but no strangely enough I'm not a fan of feces, lets just do the ten topic speed shoot

    T1CG: I bet you speak in the same tone to the FSA members when they are out of line.. *looks at Manabu with a starry gaze* I can imagine it all now, Santa suit and everything.. And yes ive been naughty hehehehe, so naughty.. *shakes off the daydream* But yes let's get to your first topic, Warfare..

    Manabu:*Manabu again stares with an odd look* Warfare, take the name in the literal sense. Every night is warfare but it's just a matter of making war into money and using it to you're own advantage, I've heard no country has benefited from prolonged warfare, those countries should take a page out of my book

    T1CG: Every sexual encounter I have with strangers is always like warfare.. I mean there is always a casualty involved and of course its not I, thanks to this big sharp knife I carry around that's shaped as a cock and balls.. But let me get to the next topic, EWNCW

    Manabu: They have some of the best talents in the world, Shuriken Tommy Thunder Kevin matthews...but theyre only the best because I left. I still have that title belt at home, funny story actually. I hang it around the doorknob if I'm with some vile prositute, you know because it's like 'EWNCW, home of the diseases'

    T1CG: I love vile prostitutes!! Have you ever had one with genital warts?? I love to cut warts off and suck the bloody puss, its quite a sensual sensation *shakes off a lusty look *.. Tell me about Supernova

    Manabu: Supernova... no matter how many times I've burnt that star out they just keep coming back but it's a star crawling with maggots, feeding off each other just hoping they can take down one member of The FSA but they never will. They just cant accept that, this isnt dolph ziggler vs kofi kingston, this is the end of the blood spewing cretins

    T1CG: Maggots are quite tasty also, I pick them from corpses out of graves I dig up.. I also have relations with said corpses but you're gonna have to have a credit card to see that footage *winks at camera*.. What are your feelings toward TheJman

    Manabu: Hmm...TheJman, I've yet to actually see him eye to eye but if he carries on the way he's going then there could be a space for him in The FSA, providing his diseases dont get too out of hand

    T1CG: What about eye to brown eye, the kind in between a pair of buttocks.. Now I bet there's a space for me in there somewhere, its destined.. Now all this talk about foretold destiny leads us to your next topic, The Prophecy

    Manabu: What is he? JBWs version of Jesus? I don't see him performing any miracles, I don't see him paying for anyones sins but the guy needs to because JBW is like being on one side of a confession box lately, people are just letting their sins take over them. Furthermore Prophecy gives our world champion a concussion! How dare he leave the number 1 guy with an injury!? But dont worry my freaky little friend, his punishment will come soon.

    T1CG: I hope the punishment involves nipple clamps connected to jumper cables and a running car battery.. It would be mayhem.. I love it!! Now your next topic is Mayhem

    Manabu: Mayhem is far from a b show, it's right up there with warfare but it's the home of chainsaw...chainsaw. A man whose slowly becoming my nemesis, I hope he's praying I don't get drafted to mayhem and I bet he's hoping god hears him

    T1CG: This photo of me in short shorts..

    Manabu: ...short shorts? excuse me!?

    T1CG: You heard me sir, we dont have all day!! You did say you're time is precious, answer me!!

    Manabu: I think you should keep that picture, keep it hidden deep away because no one wants to see a picture of a fat worthless virus scat loving freak wrapped in yellow short shorts which I'm quite sure were originally white.. Now hurry up before I have security show you the door..

    T1CG: Is it the backdoor?? Because im always known to creep right up the backdoor.. Ask any one I sodomized.. Hell, I sodomized the dog last night.. Which has us facing the topic of Alpha Dog

    Manabu:The guys cocky, extremely cocky but you gotta be good to be that cocky but even if he's not, he's still a filthy mongrel

    T1CG: I love cocks and the word cocky.. I checked a rooster once for a cock and couldnt find one *makes disappointed face*, I dont understand why they call them cocks.. Cock-a-doodle-doo reminds me of anal sex in the 13 colonies of the United States.. I bet the president loved anal.. *Smiles cheery at the camera* The name of President WWTNA Mark, whats the first thing that comes to mind??

    Manabu: Easily the best boss I've ever worked for, one of the only people at jbw that I have respect for

    T1CG: Who needs respect when you can just be creepy huh?? I guess you would have to spend a day walking in my Elmo slippers and assless chaps to understand it.. Five Star Attraction is the final topic..

    Manabu:The most amazing destructive force to ever grace the world of wrestling, everyone who's dared to stand in our way has faced the consequences, lethal consequences.

    *Two large security guys come in with suits and dark shades, they grab T1CG by the shoulders and drag him off*

    T1CG: Whoa fellas!! Squeeze harder!! I love when I get manhandled by two ape men, I always get kicked out the zoo when I hop in the gorilla cages and let them have their way..

    *security punches T1CG in the face with a heavy punch and T1CG is knocked out being dragged away*

    Manabu: *looks at the camera* I told you to get done before security came, you creepy waste of breath.. *Manabu looks to the camera man* and you? you got a wife? you hear being a cameraman trying to support em? I bet you're a horrible father, the guy who claims off the state and thinks the world owes him something. Now get out of here before I show the consequences of destroying the world. Now everyone, keep watching warfare. I've got so many suprises it'll be like christmas...again

    *The camera cuts off and we return to a really excited T1CG in the studio*

    T1CG: What a powerful individual Mr. Nanahara is.. I can spot a Megalomaniac serial killer whenever I see one, and Manabu is one.. Believe me, it takes one to know one *nodding head*.. Now I would like to introduce a new segment before we bring out our mystery guest and its all about pranks.. So here is our very first "Spotlight Prank"!! YAY!!

    Last edited by samoan619; 07-27-2011 at 10:34 PM.



    MARVEL > EVERYTHING

  4. #24
    Black Ninja! THEKEVINBRAND's Avatar
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    i'm glad i entertained some people
    The Journey of 1000 Miles begins with a single step!


  5. #25
    T1CG: *starts singing the Transformers cartoons theme song melody* Japanese people!! More than meets the eye!! You know all their women have sideways vaginas.. Believe me Ive seen it.. But right now I think its time to bring out our mystery guest!! EWNCW International Champion and HWA World Champion, thats right he holds two titles in two seperate feds, Mr. Tommy Thunder!!! Thunder!! YAY!! *claps frantically* Oh this audience loves you!!

    TT: What the hell, this isn't a live audience!! There's only a bunch of stuffed toys here!! Where the hell are my VIP's?!?! You SAID that they'd be here!!!

    T1CG: Im glad that you can reach out to the audience like that Mr. Thunder.. Thunder.. I bet thats why you're such a success in the places you are now.. Ive always been amazed by the armpit sweat you build up through your t-shirts when you do your promos.. Best armpit sweat from the best at promos..

    TT: Hell, I do go through a few t-shirts don't!! I'm always getting calls from deodorant companies, they all want me in their ads!! But like you said, thanks to my epic promo cutting, I've gone on to become a multiple time champion. In EWNCW I was the firs EVER crowned champ when I won the Forum title waaaay back at our very first ppv. And now, I'm the International champion, and not only that, the longest reigning International champion!! And if that ain't enough!! I'm also the current World champion in HWA!! And for the record, I was also the first ever champion in that company too!! How many other guys here can say that?!?! And it's all thanks to all those sweaty t-shirts!! But not even a creepy guy like you can even reach the greatness of my perspiration!!

    T1CG: I totally agree, I bought one of your sweated on shirts at an auction and I smell it every night.. It smells like greatness.. It is my Friday night jizz rag for my Friday night one man circle jerk..

    TT: What?! On one hand I can take that as a compliment, but that's just creepy man!! Anyway, Im here for the speed shoot, so lets get out of your grandma's basement and get to the point!!

    T1CG: Well to the people in the audience that are new, the speed shoots are ten topics..

    TT: Jesus man, do we really need to explain?! I mean the people out there aren't idiots!!... Well, some of them are... But I'm sure they can get the gist of what we're doing here, so please, pretty pretty please with cherries on top, can we get on with it?! And If you're good, I'll buy you a lollypop!!

    T1CG: I really love it when you talk to me like im a child.. Your first topic is Solla Mafoai

    TT: Ohhhhh please!!! The Albino Hippo Solla Mafoai!! Where oh where do I start with that freak?!?! I mean that guy, is more of a freak than you are!! No... wait, scrap that, I'd say you're both on par with each other in that department. I mean that guy was the bane of my life a month or so ago. And it all came down to a Hell in a Cell match. The FIRST EVER Hell in a Cell match in EWNCW history might I add. And He was all talk about how he was going to get medieval on my ass and tear my guts out and eat me, but I ended up beating him, OF COURSE. I mean that guy is all talk no trousers. And you know what?! He has to be the hardest guy in the world to work with!! He's just such an ass!! And then there's the problem in catering every week!! My God!! Unless you get there 2 hours early, there's no food left!! The fat son of a bitch has eaten everything!! not even one thing left!! not even a sausage roll!! DAMN!! And then there's his little Collective!! Well don't get me started there!! A struck off army Surgeon and a whack job, doped up wrestler?! Are you serious!! We're having a draft soon, and I hope to GOD they put us on opposite brands!!

    T1CG: Well I would clearly say that you truly dont understand Solla, but I do and thats why im madly in love with him and his albino skin and ginger hair.. But let me get to the next topic The Beard Of Zeus

    TT: Now this guy I like. One half of the EWNCW tag team champions Godmoney. Yeah, I've spent a few nights with these guys drinking into the early hours in bars!! This guy knows how to have a good time and he has the money to back it up. You know, once, I witnessed him and his partner Rich Cranium have a drink off against another 2 guys, and Rich got 'distracted' shall we say by this whore. Well anyway Rich left like halfway through the drink off to go do the deed with this girl, and left TBoZ on his own to face these 2 guys. Now, you'd think he lost right? WRONG!! He freaking won man!! He beat 2 guys 2 vs 1 in a drink off!! It was off the wall!! Freaking awesome!! no, that guy, in fact both those guys are real party animals, and I'm honored to be their good pal!!

    T1CG: 2 tag team mates 1 cup, I would pay for this video.. Pay with hard time as I wont give my money to see this but have them perform the act at gunpoint.. What about The Great Cobra??

    TT: Who? Never heard of him!

    T1CG: Well he has disappeared for quite awhile.. He's been riding around with me in my creepy van handing out candies to school children.. He's back now though ask him for one of our Arse Pops.. Matt Elder??

    TT: Anther cool guy. Good to hang out with, very hard working and very dedicated to the business. His tag team with Tai Night; The Force of Greatness are one of the best tag teams in e-fed wrestling today, second to Godmoney of course! But in all seriousness, we dont' have many tag teams in EWNCW at the moment, but we sure as hell have the best 2!!

    T1CG: The only force that is great within me is the force of breaking into women's homes and hiding under the beds fir a few days then masturbate as they sleep over me.. It gives me the chills thinking of such excitement.. Mark Dimension is next..

    TT: That guy scares the HELL out of me!! I mean not only is he built like a T-101 Terminator, but he actually speaks like one too!! And he does that weird electric bubble thing like the real terminator too!! Oh, and here's a scoop for ya, Dimension is actually being threatened with legal action from Schwarzenegger himself because of copyright infringement!!

    T1CG: That's not an electric bubble but an internet cum bubble, they happen all the time when you wank in front of a laptop hence why he is so great with that skill.. To stay on topic what do you feel about my whale sperm hair gel..

    TT: Say what?!

    T1CG: How does my hair look, that is topic, dont break the tradition..

    TT: Well you can kiss that lollypop I promised you goodbye!! Your hair is the result of your fugly mother having intense and randy intercourse with a creepy old man that lives in the woods not far from your house. And as for your sperm whale gel, it only adds to the creepy look. I'd say you'd be a good fit in any hairstyle catalogue. How's that?

    T1CG: Why thank you, whale sperm for hair gel makes quite the creepy look.. You wouldn't imagine what I had to do to get sperm from the whale but that doesn't matter now.. Your next topic HWA is what matters..

    TT: HWA does indeed matter. It matters because I am it's champion. It matters because it gives me a chance to express a different side of me. HWA allows me to be superior to all other members of the roster because there is nobody on that roster that is in my league. Do you understand what I'm saying to you right now? I am the best in that company at what I do, and I am going to be the HWA World champion for as long as I say I will be.

    T1CG: Billy Mccoy??

    TT: Now this is a tough one. That guy has really earned my respect since he came into EWNCW, and I know that he respects me back. But there's one thing that bugs me about him. He won't stop chasing my title. I've beaten him before, and he's now in the hunt looking for another show. Now there's showing respect, and there's drawing a line. And I'm very close to drawing several lines between Billy McCoy and my International championship.

    T1CG: I say instead of drawing lines you should draw different sized penises.. Then you post them all over your ceiling and walls like I do in my bedroom.. Inspiration indeed!! Does the JBW mean anything to you??

    TT: Haha!! Yeah, I've been critical of that place in the past!! But honestly, I have a TON of respect for JBW. I think that they have a very good, well structured, well run company going there. But what they don't have is the talent. They don't have 'The Great Pharaoh' Seth Ferrell. They don't have 'The Definition of Cool' DJ Black. They don't have 'The Instant Classic' Kevin Matthews. They don't have Shuriken. But, my creepy little friend, most importantly of all, they don't have the 'Must see MVP'; 'The Storm' Tommy Thunder!! Now, I'm an EWNCW original, and I have no plans on leaving anytime soon. BUT, if the opportunity to cross the line so to speak were to arise, then I can't say that I wouldn't seriously consider an offer from JBW. And I mean that.



    MARVEL > EVERYTHING

  6. #26
    T1CG: And they surely dont have a creepy guy doing things on camera.. They really are dropping the ball on someone like me.. I mean I can actually defecate on defeated wrestlers laying on the canvas.. Imagine me as the defecating manager, we would shit on the whole business.. Who is Kevin Matthews??

    TT: Oh yeah, the EWNCW World Heavyweight champion. Well, the guy is good, there's no denying that. But mark my words when I say, that title is not far from the grasp of the Storm. I have a lot of respect for Matthews, and he's doing a great job on Rage as our champion. But, I want that title, Shuriken wants that title, and I'm sure a hell of a lot of other guys also want it. He's going to have to defend that title against me one day, and I know that I am superior to him. I respect him, but I'm better than him.

    T1CG: People say I look quite like him..

    TT: Well you know what, you're right!! In fact, excuse the sarcasm, you bear a striking resemblance to the guy!!

    T1CG *blushes* What can I say I really try when it comes to being creepy.. Well for being such a great guest we want to give you a gift from the Box Of Mystery.. What's in there?? Is it a check for $50,000 or is it a lock of hair from this ginger midget I murdered by smothering the other night... Only one way to find out..

    TT: Let me get this straight, you want me, to put my hand, in your box of mystery? Goddamn it, fine, not that I need the money but what the hell...

    *reaches into the box grabs the only thing in the box, he looks shocked as he squeezes the contents inside, then looks inside and sees that he had just grabbed T1CG's penis poking through a hole cut inside the box*

    TT: JESUS TITTYFUCKING CHRIST!! ARE YOU SERIOUS MAN?!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! Hell!! You know you said you looked like Matthews? Well, that gives me even more of a reason to do this!!

    *Right hand to the face levels T1CG and he's down.. Thunder kicks the chairs over in the basement and storm out the basement*

    Camera Guy Uncle Stinky Fingers: *hand appears and shakes T1CG* Wake up boy!! You got to wrap up the show.. *T1CG is still out cold, Uncle Stinky Fingers scratches his butt hole and then puts his fingers in T1CG's nostrils, he wakes up with a look like he smelled a fresh pot of roasted coffee in the morning*

    T1CG: * punch drunk face with a smile* Quite refreshing that smell is..

    Uncle Stinky Fingers: Wrap up the show boy!!

    T1CG: Oh yes, yes.. Thank you to JBW's Manabu Nanahara, EWNCW's Kevin Matthews and Tommy Thunder for coming on to the show tonight.. I cant believe Tommy touched my creepy penis better yet known as the inchworm hahaha.. A two fed champ touching my sperm launcher, the best moment in my life indeed.. See you next time with JBW's Warfare TV Champion HolyJose and The Prophecy, plus another mystery guest coming out of the EWNCW.. See ya next time unless I get arrested for masturbating over doghouses..
    Last edited by samoan619; 07-27-2011 at 10:41 PM.



    MARVEL > EVERYTHING

  7. #27
    Black Ninja! Tommy Thunder's Avatar
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    Hahaha!! Brilliant!! LOL @sperm launcher!!
    Ohhh man, that was a laugh!! Glad I took the time to do this!! Got some stuff off my chest!!
    Oh, and:
    TT: Haha!! Yeah, I've been critical of that place in the past!! But honestly, I have a TON of respect for JBW. I think that they have a very good, well structured, well run company going there. But what they don't have is the talent. They don't have 'The Great Pharaoh' Seth Ferrell. They don't have 'The Definition of Cool' DJ Black. They don't have 'The Instant Classic' Kevin Matthews. They don't have Shuriken. But, my creepy little friend, most importantly of all, they don't have the 'Must see MVP'; 'The Storm' Tommy Thunder!! Now, I'm an EWNCW original, and I have no plans on leaving anytime soon. BUT, if the opportunity to cross the line so to speak were to arise, then I can't say that I wouldn't seriously consider an offer from JBW. And I mean that.
    ...Cue the rumors...
    Want to join EWN's original e-fed? Join EWNCW NOW!
    Want details? Just ask me!


  8. #28
    A big thanks to Manabu, Kevin Matthews and Tommy Thunder for being good sports.. And thanks to Leggs and Jose for checking the show and commenting.. This was a hillarious episode right here guys, thanks to all..



    MARVEL > EVERYTHING

  9. #29
    God Leggo's Avatar
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    I Lmfao so fookin hard at the box Of mistery! Fookin hilarious bruv. You have to producing these, they are brilliant!

    Serious Sidenote: Thanks for making such a big effort with these shows bruv, it's appreciated. Also, I think it's great that you've brought the two Feds together, even though were in competition so to speak.

    *tips hat*

    LEGGOD!

  10. #30
    Quote Originally Posted by Leggo View Post
    I Lmfao so fookin hard at the box Of mistery! Fookin hilarious bruv. You have to producing these, they are brilliant!

    Serious Sidenote: Thanks for making such a big effort with these shows bruv, it's appreciated. Also, I think it's great that you've brought the two Feds together, even though were in competition so to speak.

    *tips hat*
    I really appreciate the comments my brotha.. It definitely got me hype to do some more episodes now..



    MARVEL > EVERYTHING

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