Christopher Pentalion: Hwllo and welcome everyone to another edition of Monday night Rage!! We’re here live from Lincon, Nebranska and we have a great night lived up for you here tonight!! We’re one week on from crowning a brand new World Heavyweight Champion when K-Jammin beat The Beard of Zeus in last week’s main event! A shocking title change!
Bodom: It was a historic moment in EWNCW history for sure Chris. Nobody saw that coming, TBOZ least of all. But tonight, we’re going to get his thoughts on the matter.
CP: That’s right, tonight folks, EWNCW reporter Dick Thompson will open us up here tonight with a special interview with ‘The Machiavellian’! So without further ado, let’s get this show on the road!
CP: And here he is!! The man who ALWAYS speaks the truth!! Remember, if Dick Thompson says it, it’s the truth!!
Bod: I’ve heard that he’s kind of a big deal.....
*Dick Thompson emerges at the top of the ramp wearing his trademark burgundy suit and takes time to wave to both sides of the arena. He then walks down the ramp, shaking hands with fans as he goes. He climbs the steel steps before stoping again to wave to the arena before stepping between the ropes. The ring is set up with a desk and a fancy leather chair behind it and a leather sofa. Thompson is miced up with a hands free mic, and settling in the middle of the ring and waving some more, he begins to speak*
Dick Thompson: Hello and good evening good people of Lincon city and everyone at home! I’m EWNCW anchorman, Dick Thompson, and I’m kind of a big deal!
*the corwd cheer*
DT: Now I’ve come out here to conduct a special interview tonight. And interview with a former World Heavyweight Champion.
Last week of course we witnessed live on Monday night Rage The Beard of Zeus defending his title against K-Jammin, and as you all remember, K-Jammin emerged victorious.
*Loud cboos come from the crowd as Thompson awknowledges them*
DT: So what has been going through our former champ’s head this past week? What kind of mindset has he been in? I know that you know that you know that you want to know the answers to these questions, so without any further ado, please welcome former World Heavyweight Champin, The Beard of Zeus!!
CP: Well this man right here can’t be in great spirits this week. He was thrust into a title match last week and he lost. What does that tell us about him?
Bod: I don’t know what it tells us about him Chris, but it tells us a lot about our GM Joh cleverly and that son of a bitch K-Jammin. It tells us that they’re both scheming, keniving rats that are clearly in some sort of agreement with each other to take control of this show!!
CP: It certainly seems so. It seems very unfair that TBOZ here had to defend his title live on Rage last week just one week after retaining his title on ppv!
DT: First of all, thanks for joining me out here. I'm sure you're not in the mood for questions, but the people need to now some things.
First of all, let's go back to the night you won the title at Glory to the Brave. What was it like to finally realize a dream of yours and win that coveted title?
TBOZ: Dick, it was the embodiment of a life long goal. That moment when you are on the top of the mountain, in the brightest of spotlights, and doing it cleanly, there is nothing quite like it. I was delighted, proud, and empowered in the same divine moment. I've been a champion before but, when I won the World Heavyweight Title, I knew the I wouldn't be the same again.
DT: You went on to hold that title for 4 months from there. A pretty impressive reign don't you think?
TBOZ: I would call it that, yeah. 4 months at the top is difficult, and I knew that I was good enough to do it, and that no one could stop me. It proved that, even though I made mistakes, even though I bullied myself there, it was deserving. I was a worthy Champion, I proved it.
DT: But of course that all came to an end last week on rage when you were booked into a title match on the spot by John Cleverly against K-Jammin. What was your mindset when it was announced that you would have to defend your title in last week's main event?
TBOZ: I tried to focus, but it was difficult. I had just retained the title in a hard-fought match the night before, and I was really running on adrenaline. I put up as bigger fight as I could, but you can only run like that for so long.
DT: I hate to bring it up again, but you did of course lose your title. That must have been a devastating feeling.
TBOZ: You really do kick me in the nuts, don't you Dick? It hurt. I'm not going to shy away, or blame anything like I used to or like others before me have. I lost, I wasn't good enough. But I will be back, better than ever, and I will climb the mountain again.
DT: What are your thoughts on K-Jammin as a competitor, as a man?
TBOZ: K-Jammin rushed in here and grabbed the title. It's something I admire, because it's something I would have done. But, as a man, he's nothing. He has stolen what is most important to me, and I will not stop until it is mine again.
You know, recently Dick, I forgot my past. What made the TBOZ, me, and I've payed for that now. I am a former 4 time tag-team champion, and now a former World Heavyweight Champion. But not for much longer.
Because I am back, and I am ready to show that, it pays to be TBOZ.
*Out comes K-Jammin, with a smug grin and holding his EWNCW World Heavyweight Championship over his shoulder proudly *
Bod: Awwwww hell no!! What the hell does this asshole want?!
CP: I imagine he’s out here to do what he always does; spoil the night.
K-Jammin: You really are a selfish little man TBOZ. Me beating you for this World Title is the best thing that has ever happened to this company. I'm a fucking star, I'm a fucking legend and I'm a fucking icon!
You can bet your tiny little testicles that PPV buy-rates will now be higher than ever before. You can bet your little man titties that ratings will go sky high, and you can bet your title-less waist that these sad pathetic sheep in the crowd will make my merchandise sales will go through the roof because they worship me so damn much!
I saved this company TBOZ, and I would like a little fucking respect and gratitude from you. Now I understand that you feel jealous and bitter towards me, but please think of it as me putting you out of your misery. I mean, you were the most laughable World Champion since Vince Russo. I am better than you TBOZ, and I know for a fact that I can smack the piss out of your mouth again. However, just like you told me last week, you're going to have to earn a shot at this gold.
You see basically, being your usual predictive self I knew you was going to come out here tonight and say everything that you have just said. So I took the liberty of speaking to Mr. Cleverly earlier on today, and he has granted me permission to pick your poison for tonight. If you lose, then you go right to the back of the fucking line when you belong. However if you win, which I very much doubt you will may I add, then you and me will do battle at Rise from the Ashes for the World Heavyweight Championship.
Now, I could tell you who your opponent will be, but that wouldn't do enough for you proving to me that your worthy enough to be in the same ring as me. If you can beat an opponent without training for their specific style, then you know you're a tough motherfucker. So if you do that tonight, then I'll gladly kick your arse at the next PPV.
Oh and TBOZ, don't be upset about no longer being World Heavyweight Champion. It's just simply because... I'm K-Jammin, and you're not.
Bod: What a bastard!! Just you wait until I get my hands on you you disrespectfull son of a bitch!!
CP: Calm down Bodom! I think we’re all despising K-Jammin, but you need to restrain yourself here!!
Bod: Who does he think he is?! And why does he get whatever he wants from Cleverly whenever he wants?!
CP: I’m not sure. But the point is, TBOZ has a match in tonight’s main event where he will have to win if he wants his match against K-Jammin at Rise from the Ashes!
Bod: But against who?! For all I know it could be HHH!! Hulk Hogan!! Ric Flair!! Hell, it could even be ME!!!!
CP: Well I’m sure you’ll do your best if it is you, but we’ll have to wait until the main event to find out exactly who it will be!!