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  1. #621

    Pat: Hello and welcome everyone to another fantastic edition of Mayhem! We’re live in Grand Rapids, Michigan, and we promise you another great show. It’s go home week for Mayhem’s side of things, as New Horizons is on the way this Sunday November the sixth.

    Dudley: Yeah I personally cannot wait for New Horizons, as this card is really gonna be great.

    Pat: Yeah Dudley we have one of our biggest cards yet, and all of them are gonna be must see action, but enough previewing for the PPV for now. Let’s talk about what happened last Mayhem. First of all, the group that defined Mayhem for months, V-3 is now officially no more. I know my broadcast partner Dudley is happy with this, but the rest of the world is more or less in mourning over this great loss. V-3 will be missed, but it’s not as if the members of V-3 are gone. They’re all still here and ready o kick some ass!

    Dudley: Yes but their strength was their unity, and now that that’s gone the individual members of V-3 I expect are gonna start to finally take a turn for the worse, and that’s gonna start this Sunday at New Horizons.

    Pat: I wouldn’t be so sure of that if I were you. Mass, Sleeper, and Nikki have all been extremely impressive thus far since their split, and I see no reason as to why that would change. Moving on though, last week in our main event Samson defeated Pauley Cadillacs in a great singles bout, but after the match Samson was attacked by the Mayhem tag-team champions, the Silver Bros. You know revenge will be coming tonight, as The Silver Bros are gonna take on the team of Nightwolf and Silva.

    Dudley: Yeah but I wanna go back to the Pauley Cadillacs situation for a minute. Apparently he’s so mad that he got screwed out of his match again that he’s taken himself a one week vacation. With Pauley out, Kiddson boycotting the show still, and Brandon Smithson out with injuries, Mayhem is a little short-handed today.

    Pat: Yes but thankfully Daniel Truth is back and is here tonight! We do hope all of our guys make it back to Mayhem soon though. Also tonight we have big news to share with you, the board of directors talked it over, and MassDinero IS the new number one contender for the Mayhem World Championship. And what’s more, it’s been decided that the Mass vs. K-Jammin match is simply too heated for this to be a regular match, so upper management has decided to add a surprise stipulation to that match. That stipulation will be revealed to us all, incuding Mass and KJ themselves, in the final segment of the night, Jammin with K-Jammin.

    Dudley: I know people, it sucks donkey balls doesn’t it?

    Pat: No it doesn’t. Another match though has been added to the car on the Mayhem side of things though, and it’ll be Polly-Pablo vs. a mystery opponent. Now unfortunately Ms. Pablo couldn’t be hear with us tonight, but she will be stopping in to give her thoughts on her new match. In addition to that we have two humongous interviews tonight. One with K-Jammin and one with MassDinero, and they’ll e played all throughout the night in 4 parts…EACH! Both men will be talking about their respective opponents at New Horzons, and I gotta tell ya, these things are absolutely must see. I know I say that a lot, but these really are. We have all of that and much much more, as we bring you…Mayhem!

    Pat: Well okay guys, up first we have…

    The Devil’s Rejects
    Pat: Oh man. Here they are guys, all of them. Silva, Nightwolf, The Apostles, Chainsaw, and Samson, all strolling down the aisle looking very VERY pissed off.

    Chainsaw: We need everyone’s…complete silence.

    *crowd boos*

    Samson: Right now we’re going to talk about what exactly happened last Mayhem, and what better place to start then the main event. It was me vs. that nothing Paul Cadillacs. Now after teaching his good friend the meaning of fair and balanced officiating, I was granted my rematch. Destroying him was nothing, but then…SilverDust.

    Chainsaw: To say The Silver Bros have become a nuisance is completely understating the obvious. They apparently think we’re a group that enjoys being fucked with. Well let me set the record straight, we’re not.

    Silva: Tonight in our match with The Silver Bros, me and Nightwolf aren’t just going to get revenge on The Silver Bros, we’re going to punish them. They think they can attack me from behind, use me as bait, and get away with it?? *takes a deeeeep breath and musters up a sick smile* If you people think I’m *twitch* crazy now, just wait until tonight.

    Nightwolf: You two should consider yourselves extremely lucky that Samson and Chainsaw called you first, because we have orders to save some of you for them. That means you get to survive just that much longer. Waste this precious time if you must, but I would…strongly..consider using this time to write up your last will and testament.

    Chainsaw: Yes Rejects. Very astute observation. You’re learning. However this is not the only thing that happened last week. I seem to remember all of us, especially Silva, going out on a limb to accept an outsider into our family. We offered this person the world. We offered this broken down shell of a being a chance to become something great, and she SPAT in our eye. You…broke Silva’s heart Katie, and even though it will do you no good, one good thing that’s come of this is that he now has no heart. Just know that aligning yourself with AngrySamoan will not save you. Quite on the contrary, it’s doomed you.

    Samson: You see Katie, we thought you knew what you were signing up for when joining our family, and yet at the same time we knew deep down that the wretched, weak, scared little girl had a strong hold on you. We were not merciless, at any time you could have walked away from us and that would have been the end of it. But now, now you decide to cradle yourself into the arms of that weakness enabling AngrySamoan, and now your fate is sealed. Silva…is going to “Chris Benoit” you both. *crowd boos tremendously at the terrible, offensive reference*

    Chainsaw: And last but not least, we get to the subject at hand that everyone seems to be talking about. V-3, gone forever. Mass….Dinero. You want to punch me in the face, after what I did for YOU? You’ve humiliated me Mass, and I don’t take kindly to humiliation. Although I do get it. I understand why you would be a little sore at me. After all, it was me, who single handedly did what you couldn’t. It was me who had Iron Ape fired. Sure, I used you as a pawn, but at the end of the it was ME who set MY plan into motion, allowing you to pick up the scraps. I gave you exactly what you wanted, but no, you couldn’t leave well enough alone. You had to suckerpunch me in the face, leaving me lying on the floor. Well Mass, do you feel good about yourself? Are you happy that you’ve opened up this can of worms on the man that in less than one month did what took you half a year to accomplish? Well my friend, this is not over between you and I. Not by a long shot. But now, of course you don’t have the security blanket of V-3 around you, do you? You made a BIG tactical error Mass. You thought The Eye was the bigger threat to this company, and now that they’re gone you thought everything can go back to being it’s peachy self again. Well your wrong Mass. The war is over, and to the victor *points around to al of TDR* go the spoils. *maniacal laugh*

    Sleeper's music hits!

    *The pyro explodes with a bright and thunderous boom and when the fire and smoke clears The Sleeper is standing in the entrance way. Sleeps comes out to a big time pop and stands a the top of the ramp with a mic in hand*

    Sleeps: Are you fucking delusional? I mean, I know you’re delusional, but I thought you at least had some common sense. Well damn. Looks like I’m gonna have to lay some logic down on your goofy asses. First of all, it wasn’t you who got Ape fired, it was Mass who pinned Ape for the 1,2,3. And it wasn’t your little rejects who came out and stopped The Eye from interfering, it was V-3. It might have been your plan that brought it all about, but we were the ones to execute it. And besides, you think that firing Ape wasn’t on the agenda to begin with? Man you guys are more psycho then I thought. We were just gonna do it on our time, not yours.

    As far as the war is concerned, WE won it, not you. We put the final nail in Iron Ape’s coffin, and you were just riding our coattails along for the ride. But if you really think The Devil’s Rejects are the bigger threat to this company and something V-3 needed to worry about, then how ‘bout I challenge you to a match right now. Chainsaw and Samson vs. The Sleeper and a partner of my choosing in the main event tonight. How’s that sound to you?

    Chainsaw: Oh it sounds lovely, but it sounds to me like V-3 hasn’t really split up at all. You know, with you teaming up together again and all. Maybe my words got to you, and you finally came to your senses and reunited.

    Sleep: Oh no my man, you think just because V-3 has split we aren't still best of friends. And wouldn't still have each others backs. V-3 was more than just a stable unlike The Eye, which if I remember correctly some of you were apart of. You're just lucky Mass and Nikki are both busy tonight, but you can bet your ass I’ll find someone to team with.

    Samson: *mockingly laughs* Good luck finding anyone on the roster who’s willing to face us. With V-3 gone you’ll be by yourself tonight.
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 03:32 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  2. #622
    Sleep: You act like you little freaks haven’t made enemies around here. Imma get me a partner boys, and once I do we’re gonna teach you the meaning of respect. Just know one thing rejects, one former member of V-3 and one outsider >>>> All of The Devil’s Rejects combined. Peace. *drops the mic and heads to the back, leaving The Devil’s Rejects looking pissed in the middle of the ring*

    Pat: Wow what a huge main event tonight! The Sleeper and a partner of his choosing vs. Samson and Chainsaw! Talk about ratings.

    Dudley: Yeah it should be a good match. It kinda sucks though, because remember how last week in the main event you didn’t have anyone to root for? Well, now I don’t have anyone to root for in tonight’s main event.

    Pat: Root for The Sleeper like the rest of the world.

    Dudley: Yeah I probably will…but I really hope those guys rip each other apart! Yeah, that’s what I’ll root for: injuries!

    Pat: You’re the worst kind of person duds. Moving on before I lose my dinner Well fellas, right now we’re gonna kick off our 4 part series with K-Jammin, in which he gave us a fantastic interview with Dave. We’ll just shut up now and let you watch for yourselves.

    *Dave and K-Jammin are sitting in a dark room about to start the much anticipated sit down interview, there is a huge " Ma$$Dinero Vs K-Jammin III " Poster behind them...*

    Dave: Hello ladies and gentleman, im joined by World Heavyweight Champion K-Jammin. Now I have to admit, I was desperate to get out of this due to you putting me in hospital on several occasions but I've been told you that you've given your word that will not happen again

    KJ: Yeah im not in the mood to slap you around today Dave, im here for a good ol' fashioned interview

    Dave: Glad to hear it, what I thought we could do is take a look back at how this whole rivalry with you and Mass started. We're gonna show you a clip from Pioneered Annihilation back in May.

    MassDinero vs. Wes Goldman
    Wait a minute, what the fuck is Iron Ape doing out here he should just stay in the back and mind his own business. The live crowd here tonight is obviously not happy with the fact that he’s out here right now, and I get the feeling something fishy is about to take place.*Iron Ape stands at the top of the ramp and speaks*

    “Mass! Do you really think I was gonna sit here idly by and let you get the better of me? I’m Iron fucking Ape, I’m YOUR boss and your never gonna make a fool out of me again. Guess what, your match with Wes Goldman is now a handicap match with these men…
    *Wes Goldman and RedDevilSavista stand at the top of the ramp next to Iron Ape, who continues to talk* Yeah, that’s right, both your gonna be facing off against both GoldDiggers here tonight. Oh, and this man too…have fun.”
    K-Jammin’s new music hits and I guess he’s been added to the mix as well. What kind of odds are these though? 3 on 1 isn’t fair by any means! All four men make their way to ring side now as they eagerly await the arrival of their prey.

    MassDinero makes his way to the ring and he doesn’t look too happy with these odds. Ape really stacked the deck against him this time around folks.

    Not much to say here. This one panned out just the way you expected it would in a three on one match. MassDinero got some good offense in, but he was no match for three guys. To add insult to injury, Goldman began berating Mass in the middle of the ring for now reason. And then to add injury to insult to injury Chainsaw for some ungodly reason decided to come in and attack MassDinero even more. What does this mean? Has Chainsaw aligned himself with Iron Ape? I mean, we did see the two talking to each other last night, but why??
    Dave: Now how did this come about? Because you had only been in the company for just under a month when that took place?

    KJ: That was strictly business, I needed to make a statement and plus Ape paid me alot of money for that. I think that was the genesis of our rivalry, apparently he didn't take my part in his screw job lightly. But as I said, this was in no way personal. Mass was top dog on Mayhem and I knew that if I was going to catch people's attention, then I would need to use him to make it.

    Dave: I see, now at the beginning of June a war of words broke out between you and Mass over the internet. It started by you making a joke about you being the only person allowed to beat erm, me up. Mass made the following response:

    " Oi!! Watch that over inflated pie-hole of yours, son. If it gets any bigger it'll be the perfect size for me to reach in with my fist, grab the top of your yellow spine and "FINISH HIM" like the best Mortal Kombat character, ever! Fact.

    Run along now, MassDinero has way bigger fish to fry, and has no time for, ahem, mid-carders... Hahahahaha!!!!"

    Dave: Now as expected, you didn't take this too well and had a response of your own...

    "Run your mouth Massy baby, i have no problem breaking your legs either and i may be a mid-carder for now but i have more talent in my dick than you do in your entire body! but that's not your fault i guess, that's just what happens when your parents are brother and sister. Poor boy, so why dont you shut up and give that hole in your face a chance to heal. Think your special boy? You have special needs I'l give you that. I'l be seeing you soon geezer!"

    Pat: See what I mean guys? And that’s just part one. We’ll have plenty more where that came from later, but right now I’d like to get Dudley’s initial thoughts on K-Jammin’s interview. So what of it Dudley.

    Dudley: Well I saw this thing in the production room and I was amazed at just how great K-Jammin really was. I mean, I knew he was the best in the world before, but he’s taken his game to a whole new level. I tell you one more thing too, K-Jammin’s interview>>>>Mass’s interview. Mass’s interview is boring as hell. Don’t even watch it seriously.

    Pat: Dudley telling our fans to change the channel, oh the frivolity never ends around here. Anyway, we now have the gorgeous Melissa Mendez standing by with none other than our resident crazy chick... Nikki Belzova. Given the fact that V3 fired Melissa a few weeks ago, and the fact that V3 are no more, this should be interesting. Take it away Melissa.

    Melissa Mendez: Thank you, Pat, and that's right Ladies and Gentlemen, with me now is none other than PandaMassacre AKA Nikki Belzova *crowd pop and wolf whistle*. Now Nikki, firstly I want to ask, how do you feel about Ma$$Dinero's decision to call it a day on V3?

    Nikki: V3 were no longer needed around here, and to tell the truth, I personally had no desire to play gooseberry in the brewing war between The Eye and The Devils Rejects. If the powers that be have decided that having two sets of assholes going at it is more enjoyable than a good ol' fashioned struggle between good and evil, then so be it. Sleeps, Ma$$, and myself are all tough enough to look after ourselves, and if any -and I do mean ANY- of those motherfuckers step anywhere near me, they're gonna end up with my Dr Martin lodged in their tiny cock and balls, or if their name is Katie, their oversized bucket of a cunt... V3 might be over, but we'll still be here doing our thing the only way we know how.

    Melissa: Wow, strong words. Now, before we talk about Marie, I would like to ask you -woman to woman- why did V3 really fire me?

    Nikki: Haha! We fired you because you're nothing more than a slut. A stupid slut at that. You have nothing to offer, other than your *moves her face close up towards Melissa's* good... Looks *Smiles and blows a kiss.*, and I don't even remember a time when you said anything worth listening to... Next question. You're beginning to bore me.

    Melissa: *Looks shocked.*

    Nikki: I said.. Next.. Question.

    Melissa: Right, um, uh, how do you feel about your upcoming match with Marie, at New Horizons?

    Nikki: This match has been a long time coming, and, part of me wants to say that this will be a cake walk, but the truth is, Marie is a hell of a worker, is super tough, and has been around the world facing off against some of the worlds toughest broads. We're talking about the woman who took Manami Toyota to her limits, and had been teaching Martinez Mercedes how to really throw down in the squared circle in the months before she debuted here. But this thing is about more than who the best wrestler is, and it has been personal ever since she stepped foot in JBW. When she came in here claiming to be the only Italian to grace the house of Jabe, she made an oversight that may just cost her her career, because when we go at it, there won't be a wrestling hold on earth that will save her from my fist crushing her face into a thousand pieces.

    *Nikki grabs the mic from Melissa and pushes her off screen.*

    Marie Piscatelli, when we meet on November the sixth, it will be a war, but it will be a war that can only end in victory for this undefeated Italian crazy chick... Ciao... Bella .

    *Blows kiss.*

    Dudley: Pretty tough words from a woman who in all likelihood is going to get her fat ass handed to her on November the sixth at New Horizons. Lets move on.

    Pat: As you wish. Up next we have some great singles action between two fierce rivals.
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 03:35 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  3. #623
    Match 1: Red Ryda vs. Anomander Rake

    Anomander Rake

    Pat: Here comes Anomander with Demonic, and these two are the eldest member of The Devil’s Rejects. Anomander will be going against Red Ryda here tonight, and this match will be a nice preview of what’s to come this Sunday at New Horizons when The Jackasses will face The Apostles.

    Dudley: Well you’re right and wrong at the same time Pat. Anomander Rake is a dominant human being, ad even though both of these guys in this match are tag-team specialists, The Jackasses rely on their tag team maneuvers far more heavily than The Apostles do.

    Pat: Meaning you don’t think this match favors Red Ryda as much as it does Anomander Rake?

    Dudley: Yes and it might not be indicative of what’s to come this Sunday.

    Pat: I hear ya.

    Red Ryda

    Pat: As The Jackasses make their way out, let me get one thing clear with Dudley, do you think Anomander is gonna win this match right now, and then he and Demonic will lose to the Jackasses come Sunday at New Horizons?

    Dudley: No, I just think this will be an absolute slaughter and in the PPV match The Jackasses might get in a couple of offensive moves.

    Pat: Ahh I see, because for a minute there you sounded like you were picking The Jackasses over The Apostles, and that wouldn’t be very consistent of you at all.

    Dudley: When have I ever been consistent Pat?

    Pat: Very true. This one is under way.

    Pat: Anomander wins this one sided match pretty handedly. Dudley you might just be right.

    Dudley: I usually am.

    Pat: What the hell? The Apostles are jumping The Jackasses after the match!

    Dudley: What did you expect? A handshake? These are The Apostles Pat.

    Pat: That doesn’t mean I have to like it. The Apostles are just overpowering, and the Jackasses are no match for them in a fight like this.

    *The Apostles stand over the downed Jackasses, gloating as we head to commercial break*

    Pat: Well we’re back from commercial now, and we’ve heard from K-Jammin and that was great, but now it’s gonna get really juicy, as the first part of Mass’s interview is up next. I for one cannot wait to show this to you all, so I’m not gonna wait anymore. Enjoy.

    *Roland Butters is seen sitting in a studio, and there are Sony 50 inch HD Flat screen TV's showing KJam Vs Ma$$ highlights. Ma$$Dinero walks on screen, and sits down opposite Rolland.*

    Roland Butters: Thank you for your time Ma$$, I'm sure this is a super busy time for you, what with how much preparation you must be doing for your massive match coming up with Mayhem World Heavyweight Champion K-Jammin at New Horizons on the 6th of this month.

    Ma$$Dinero: Nah, I'm preparing just as much for this match as I do for any other. See, I have, like, the best fucking state of the art gym that money can buy in my basement. It's literally a real gym that people actually pay -a shit load of money- to use, and is just one of the many sidelines of the franchise that is Ma$$Dinero. Me and my current team of trainers -Kenta Kobashi, William Regal and ol' Stone Col'- have been working on tactic's during our last few strategy sessions, which has been so much fun its not fucking true! Those guys are hilarious to be around, Kenta can't talk a word of English, but he still manages to crack me up through his translator Sonny Ono. Don't get me wrong, though, its not all fun and games, and It's an honour to be working with those guys. I'm absorbing a lot of their philosophy's and have benefited greatly from working with them. Although, I must say, that as great as those guys are, they've had their day, and they're a little brittle these days.. Like, I'm a bit heavy handed, and just yesterday I nearly broke Steve Austin in half when I power slammed him a little too hard after he said the name of my finishing move was too long. He's alright now, but it was touch and go for a few seconds. Steve and the gang aren't the only "Superstars" that I've trained with. I'm always working out and getting tips and training with someone new every two to three weeks. See... Wrestling is like any other fighting form, and the moment you stop training, or seeking advice from your mentors, or just plain learning, then you might as well call it a day. Roland, I often get over looked for my wrestling skill in favour of my brawling, but I'm the last student of Ted Betley, and believe me, bruv, when all is said and done, this world will know that I was his best. I'm a student of this game, and when I'm not wrestling, or in the studio, or fucking chicks, or hitting those clubs, I'm training. I get about four hours sleep a day, but I'm a machine that can't be stopped, and K-Jam is gonna realize that at New Horizons.

    Roland: Speaking of The Great Saviour, just how did it all start between you two? K-Jam reckons it was you that made it personal.

    Ma$$: Yeah, well, K-Jam's a mug. So are you, but, I'll tell you a little story about how it all started.
    Once upon a time, a young man by the name of K-Jammin debuted in JBW, and upon his debut he made an enemy out of me for life.

    Roland: How so?

    Ma$$: He got my very good friend Dave arrested, and if it wasn't for the fact that my lawyer is the most heartless bastard in the business, Dave'd be rotting in a cell now. From that moment on he was a marked man. He was on Ma$$Dinero's SHIT list, and there was no saving him. But you know what? I reckon that its just in our blood to hate each other. I reckon that our ancestors have been going at it since the beginning of mankind, and maybe even before that. There was probably a caveman back in prehistoric times that was called K-Rock, and he had caveman beef with a caveman named MassDinodinero, and K-Rock was jealous of the fact that MassDinodinero was the king of the village. In ancient Roman Times there was probably a great gladiator by the name of Ma$$imus Murderous, and his main rival in the Roman Coliseum was a snakey arsekisser named K-Judas. Thinking about it, a legitimate batty boy like K-Jam would have fit in perfectly during the Roman times. These days I hear he fits in perfectly during Roman's lunchtimes. But thats just a rumour.... Maybe me and K-Jam were powerless to resist the urge to want to murder one another. I mean, we're both ego card carriers, and we both think we're the best. Add that to the fact that we both know how to talk shit with the best, and we have ourselves a recipe for disaster.

    Pat: Mass delivering the insight to this feud like few can. I tell ya, with both these guys re-opening old wounds like this, expect to see an absolute war out there this Sunday. Right now though we’re gonna cut to the back where Damian Icarus just walked out of a room and our own Suzi X is there to greet him.

    Damian: *talking to the unseen person on the other side of the door* So that’s the plan then? Right man, you can count on me. Oh hell Suzi. What can I do ya for my sexy little cyclopes?

    Suzi: Interview?

    Damian: Sure thing. What’s on your mind?

    Suzi: Well first of all, who were you just talking to, and what was this plan you spoke of?

    Damian: Well, I have some big time news to share with you Suz, tonight I’m gonna be teaming up with The Sleeper in the main event to face Samson and Chainsaw.

    Suzi: Wow that is big news. Why the hell do you want to go up against Samson and Chainsaw, even if you do have Sleeper as your partner?

    Damian: That wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement was it? Glad to see I’ve gained people’s confidence around here.

    Suzi: You called me a cyclopses.

    Damian: I did didn’t I? Oh well, my bad. First of all I’m 1-0 in the main event here in JBW so far, and I wanna do whatever it takes to make it to 2-0, so I figured why not? Second of all, I aint afraid of nobody, and that includes The Devil’s Rejects. And third of all, me and Sleeper come from a very similar background, and even though I’m straight edge to the core and you can barely keep a blunt outta Sleep’s mouth, we can still work together well I think. Besides, me and Sleepy both can get Loco with anyone, even the Rejects. *winks at the camera*

    Suzi: Well that answers that, but I wanna talk to you now about Kiddson. Kiddy baby has boycotted the show for two straight weeks now. How do you feel about that?

    Damian: Well shit, I told the man last week if he ever wants a rematch I’m down for it. Maybe he doesn’t hear so well. Well look, I this guy wants me that bad, maybe you can do me a favor and go find someone who knows Kiddson personally, and tell him that I’m waiting for him whenever he’s ready. Can you do that for me dollface? *puts his arm around Suzi*

    Suzi: I’ll try if you agree no to touch me.

    Damian: Deal. *walks away*

    Suzi: Back to you guys.

    Pat: Thanks Suz. Up next we have yet another great singles match, as two of Mayhem’s brightest young stars are facing off head to head.
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 03:39 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  4. #624
    Match 2: NVON vs. Rob Rage


    Pat: Here’s Nico van Oranje-Nassau with his usual cocky ass entrance, and Duds let me ask you something since you’ve seem to taken a liking to this guy. NVON is apparently rich as shit right?

    Dudley: Well yeah Pat, he’s royalty!! Just look at all that money dropping to the ground!

    Pat: Then why won’t he allow some lucky fan to get even one single bill from his entrance?

    Dudley: Let me answer your question with another question: what have these fans ever done for him?

    Pat: They help pay his salary.

    Dudley: He doesn’t need any money, he’s rich. He’s here to restore his nation to prominence, not to make even more money.

    Pat: That’s still a shitty way of going about things.

    Rob Rage

    Pat: Here’s a guy who I’m seeing huge things for in the future. Rob Rage has been nothing short of great since he’s been here, and his stock will continue to rise as he improves more and more.

    Dudley: Well I don’t know about that. Let’s see if he can get through Mr. Nico van tonight, and then we’ll talk.

    Pat: What in the world did we just witness??

    Dudley: We witnessed NVON pick up another fantastic win here tonight!

    Pat: No we didn’t! We saw someone from under the ring hit Rob Rage with a wrench, and NVON picking up the scraps! Who the hell was that?

    *Matt Haze comes out from under the ring to a chorus of boos. He stares at Rob Rage who’s sill barely conscious, and puts up two fingers. We can hear him say “That’s two matches now! Two to your one!”*

    Pat: Matt Haze just screwed Rob again. God help him when Rage gets his hands on him. He’s gonna tear him apart.

    Dudley: Yeah right! Matt Haze is basically saying “anything you can do I can do better.” Rage cost Haze one match, Haze cost Rage two.

    Pat: We have to move on now, but we’re gonna see one time Rage get his hands on MPH, and it won’t be pretty. Well guys now it’s time now for part two of the K-Jammin interview with Dave. Once again we’re gonna shut up and let K-Jammin and Dave do the talking.

    Dave: So at this point, I think it's safe to say that you two really didn't like eachother

    KJ: I couldn't stand the prick, V3 had just been established and his ego was sky fucking high. Why he felt the need to embarrass me and slam me on the web any chance he got I still don't know, but I think I gave him abit of a shock when I gave him just as good as I got every single time. You see, Mass is an intimidating fella, ALOT of people would not have replied to him in risk of angering him. But that's just what separates me from the rest of the roster, I have balls, huge ones.

    Dave: Your war of words with Mass then had to be put on hold for a while, as you had to tend to some business with Mr. Amazing Brandon Smithson. Now during your matches with Smithson you have claimed that you imagined you was in the ring with Mass instead, is this true?

    KJ: Yeah it's true, Brandon Smithson? Your putting me in the ring with Brandon fucking Smithson? I can't get motivated wrestling a hippy, and if not motivated then I will most likely fuck up and lose the match. So i wanted to replace Smithson's face with someone I hate, and who else better than MassDinero. My hate for Mass escalated to a new level around this time, I couldn't understand why he was in the main events, I couldn't understand why he had so much air time, I couldn't understand why he was getting paid so much that he could casually turn up to work in a fucking tank, I couldn't understand why it wasn't me! But I needed to keep cool, stay focussed because I knew that if i kept doing what Im doing then it's only a matter of time because management would book me against Mass.

    Dave: Now at the PPV Global Uprising you faced Smithson yet again, the match ended as a no contest, but then Mass comes out and you two brutally beat the shit out of eachother. What was Mass's reasoning to do this?

    KJ: To be honest, I can't even remember. I did something to one of his car's which he didn't like. But honestly, after we stopped brawling even though I was hurting real bad, I knew I had got into Mass's head. I knew right then that anytime now I would get the opportunity I wanted which was to go one on one with Mass.

    Dave: The Mayhem after the PPV, was the debut of the ranking system and I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but alot of people were surprised at you being ranked at number 3. Do you think you was ranked so high because of your recent interaction with Mass?

    KJ: Without a fucking doubt. Im hardly gonna' be ranked number 3 because of a no contest match with fucking Brandon Smithson. Mass was ranked at number 2, so I knew that if I was to face him and beat him then I would then be ranked number 2. Leaving me ready to step in when Siaki would fail to capture the World Championship from Chainsaw.

    Dave: The week after saw you and Katie have a live sex celebration, only to be interrupted by Mass. He then insulted you, called Katie a slag, and then told you to cuck off in which you did. How did that make you feel?

    KJ: Was probably one of the most embarrassing moments of my life, but who got the last laugh that night Dave? Oh I believe that would be me! The main event that night was The Silver Bros Vs Mass and St George AKA Drum and Bass, shit name by the way, I mean really? Anyways, they beat The Silver Bros and out I come and bash Mass right in the back of his fat fucking head.

    Dave: Well we actually have a clip of that, take a look...

    Drum and Bass win their debut match as a tag-team here in JBW and they beat the Mayhem tag-team champions to boot! Let’s hope this wasn’t a one night only thing like they said before! George and Mass walk their way up the ramp giving each other congratulatory daps when out of nowhere K-Jammin comes in with a steel chair and slams it into the back of MassDinero. An obviously shocked St. George gives chase to K-J but the fookin coward has already taken flight through the crowd. St. George tends to Mass when we hear K-jammin speak on a mic.

    KJ: “Did you see that? You all saw that right? Those bastards just tried to double team me just now. You cowards haven’t seen the last of me by a long shot. Mass, I hope you can hear me over the sounds of your own agonizing screams. You think you can try to punk me out in front of my girl and get away with it?!? This was supposed to be a beautiful evening shared between me and my angel, but you ruined it!! You have no idea of who you’re dealing with! This is just the beginning Mass, get ready to feel more and more pain, because every single week from here on out your gonna get beaten to a bloody pulp. Oh, and after I’m done with you, me and Katie are gonna pay you a visit in the hospital and fuck all night long in top of you if we have to. Maybe then you’ll learn not to fuck with K-Jamm!”
    Dudley: See guys, this is why K-Jammin is the best in the business. And we’re only half way done with this interview! Can you believe it? We still have two more of these left, AND Jammin wit’ K-Jammin! This is such a great night.

    Pat: Yes and don’t forget we have three more of Mass’s interview still to go as well.

    Dudley: Yeah yeah…

    Pat: Time now for the…

    Mayhem Move Of The Week

    Pat: This spectacular move by Nico van Oranje-Nassau last week in his debut wow’ed us all. He used it to pick up the win vs. Yes_I_Am in dominant fashion. I said it last week and I’ll say it again, I don’t like this guy, but he’s very very impressive. Do you agree with the selection for move of the week this week?

    Dudley: Did K-Jammin wrestle last week?

    Pat: No.

    Dudley: Then hell yeah! Nico van Oranje Nassau is quickly becoming one of my favs. He’s gonna be a major player here in Jabe.

    Pat: You could be right Dudley, but that doesn’t mean I have to like the guy. OK, guys, I now have the distinction of asking everybody if they can divert their attention to the JabeTron, where we have a tough, intelligent, and above all beautiful woman by the name of Polly-Pablo ready to say a few words about her upcoming match against a mystery opponent at New Horizons.

    Polly: Well hello there Mayhem viewers, I trust you are all keeping well?
    The word on the street is that there is to be a mystery opponent for me at the next PPV – New Horizons.

    Seen as I am still fairly new here and many may feel that I am, as yet, unproven as a contender, I feel that there may be those silent questions that are being asked of me.

    Should I be quaking in my boots at the thought of the unknown? Should I be aprehensive at whom my opponent may be? Do I doubt my abilities against the untested?

    Maybe I should be….but the cold hard truth is, I’m not. Polly fears nothing and nobody!
    Send out who you may to that ring, I’ll be waiting…. and when that particular inconvienience to my unbeaten run has been pinned, whomever it may be, I’ll continue on my way with a smile on my face and a spring in my step.

    Polly has few emotions, but I am blessed with the ability to feel excitement…and my cup runneth over with excitement as I look forward to my very first PPV.
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 03:46 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  5. #625
    Pat: Thank you for your time Polly. You’ve been nothing short of great since you’ve been here. Good luck come Sunday.

    Dudley: Stop kissing ass Pat.

    Pat: What? I like Polly. And Mr. I Jizz in My Pants Every Time K-Jammin’s Music Hits cannot talk to me about ass kissing. We’re moving on now. Okay JABE fans, I have a serious question for you: Are you guys ready for awesomeness? Well good, because part 2 of MassDinero’s interview is coming up right now! Just like before we’re gonna kick things off right where we left off.

    Roland: Indeed. Now, what are some of your favourite moments during this feud?

    Ma$$: That's what I love about this feud. Theres just so many crazy moments to choose from, that only a loser, with way too much time on his hands, could sit there and go through it all..... Anyway, here's a few for ya'.. Hows about the time that I finally got to meet The A-Team? Those mother fuckers are joke to be around, and they helped me to trap K-Rat that one time. Then there was that tag match where me and Dave kicked the shit out of you and K-Kid, and we proved to you that innovation > imitation all day long! But, I guess my favourite time was when I knocked that fool out in front of his mum and dad at Wembely Stadium.

    Roland: I knew you'd talk about that horrible night. What about all the times that K-Jam got one up on you. He's put a hurting on you more than once. Care to share any painful memories with us?

    Ma$$: *Looks at Roland for a second or two.* Hmm. Alright... That golf club he beat me with broke my rib. If i broke your rib right here, Dudley, you'd be hospitalised. Instantly. I was at the best boat party I've ever been to that very night! Either way, when K-Jam swung that thing, it fucking hurt! You know what else hurt? Our three stages of hell match at Rampage of the Titans. That match was nasty painful and trust me when I say K-Jam is a tough little son of a council slag! We hurt each other in that, or should I say those, matches. He's deadly in that ring, and on the night he was the better man. I acknowledged that when I shook his hand. Respect was given, and I would have moved on.. Then he did what he did and won the belt from Siaki in a farce of a contest that involved another wanker.

    Roland: Are you referring to the faceless one.. RomanFlare?

    Ma$$: Of course I am you idiot.

    Roland: Ok, now now... So, what made you actually decide that you think you deserve a title shot?

    Ma$$: *Leans forward.* Are you trying to say I don't deserve a title shot?

    Roland: No, not at all, but what I meant to say was, what made you want to go after him now?

    Ma$$: Man, I've got to say its a combination of things. One - Siaki. Two - George, and three -if I'm honest- the belt. It's time for people to recognise that I'm the man around here, and as long as a man who I know I can beat is walking around with the world title, they won't be saying that. Hence the reason why I just have to take the title off the wanker, who's real name is Perciville Smith, at New Horizons. It's a must.

    Pat: Mass is absolutely right about that last part. It’s been Mass’s show from day one around here. He’s been the most impressive in the ring, the most impressive on the mic, and the most impressive to the fans. It’s his time now. He needs that belt and I think he’s gonna get it.

    Dudley: Hmmph, and you call yourself unbiased. K-Jammin has been the best on the mic, in the ring, and gets the biggest reaction from the fans. It’s KJ who’s the best in this industry and he has the top prize to prove it. There’s no way that overhyped joke of a man MassDinero is gonna take that belt. No. Way.

    Pat: Jeez Duds, you aren’t giving Mass a chance?

    Dudley: Nope.

    Pat: Something tells me Vegas’s odds on Mass winning the belt just went up.

    Dudley: Hey is that some sort of dig?

    Pat: Moving on…

    Match 3: Helmsley vs. AngrySamoan


    Pat: Here comes Helmsley, and this guy has been an absolute bully as of late, putting everyone out that he can get his hands on, including interpreters that we brought in to interview the man. There’s no doubt his career has been on the upswing, but at what cost?

    Dudley: At any cost. The old helmsley was basically a big puppy dog, the new helmsley is a Rottweiler ready to attack.

    Pat: Well no doubt he’ll try to do the same to AngrySamoan here, but I don’t think he’ll find that to be a difficult task.


    Pat: Here comes AngrySamoan and he has with him Katie, who’s about as happy as I’ve seen her since the days of her and K-Jammin. I don’t know if this is a wise move Dudley. Something tells me seeing these two together is gonna really upset Silva, and that’s never good.

    Dudley: I agree Pat. I don’t know if this is smart, but then again maybe Katie feels safer with Angrysamoan close by instead of her being in the back alone while AngrySamoan has his match.

    Pat: That’s a good point too. Well these two big bulls are locking horns and this one is underway.

    (ignore vid after 6:54)

    http://<a href="</a>

    Pat: Both men down now, but AngrySamoan is stirring. Oh shit we have a jumper.

    Dudley: That’s not a jumper, that’s Silva!

    Pat: God you’re right! Silva running out from the crowd and he’s now giving chase to Katie! Run Katie run!

    *AngrySamoan get’s up and tries to help Katie but he runs into a wicked clothesline from Helmsley. Helmsley then picks up AngrySamoan and hits a powerbomb on him. Helmsley goes for the cover and it’s 1,2,3*

    Pat: Oh man that was a vicious couple of moves by Helmsley, and he picks up the win here tonight. But lets not lose sight of what’s important here because Katie is in trouble. Silva is a freakin lunatic and he was chasing after Katie hard. Can we get an update on that? Anyone?

    Dudley: I’m getting something. Security has apparently detained Silva just before he was ready to grab Katie.

    Pat: Oh that’s great news Dudley.

    Dudley: And what’s more management has insisted that Katie have a team of guards around her 24-7 as long as The Devil’s Rejects are in the building.

    Pat: *phew* That was too close though. I don’t think Katie is gonna come out with AngrySamoan anymore. Well guys, it’s time to move on, and move on we shall. Once again we’re gonna cut our cameras to our taped feed of the K-Jammin interview with Dave. Same thing as last time, we’ll pick it up right where we left off. Enjoy.

    Dave: Now it seemed like you was more angry towards Mass because he dis respected Katie rather than you wanting to make a statement

    KJ: I never cared for Katie, but if I had told Mass the reason I want to fight him is to further my career, then he would have never agreed to fight me. It's called strategy Dave.

    Dave: The war continued next week, when V3 interrupted you in a unique style.

    KJ: You mean the whole A-team thing? Fuck was that dumb, I was almost embarrassed for them. Here we have 2 fully grown men and St George and there pretending to be army men? Fucking hell, dumb as fuck. However, Mass finally challenged me to a match and I knew my opportunity had finally come. I would have preferred if he didn't beat me up after, but ya' know.

    Dave: Now the match had been confirmed, and you two had a brutal lead up to the match, and as if the match wasn't important enough, the match would be held at Wembley Stadium in England, where your both from. Any nerves where the big night arrived?

    KJ: Excitement more than nerves, because I knew if I pulled of this win then I would almost certainly get a world title shot, which obviously would mean more money.

    Dave: Let's take a look at how that match ended...
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 03:54 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  6. #626
    Mass just went for a London 'bo, but K-Jam ducked and Mass just nailed referee Willie Willie square in the nose and poor Willie's face is a shattered mess of claret and mucous! Taking advantage of the situation, K-Jam nails Mass with a yakuza kick to the back of the skull! Wham! Mass goes down! K-Jam is now calling for Katie to get in the ring to help him put the boots to Mass. They are really laying it on thick as the 80'000 members of Mass' Masses watch on appalled at what they are witnessing!*

    Pat: Wait, who's that running down the aisle?

    Dudley: It's hard to tell from this far away but the fans are going mental, Pat! Is-Is that...


    Dudley: What's that bitch doing here?!?!?

    *Dudley soon finds out the answer to his question as the one and only Nikki Belzova slides in the ring and ducks a wild haymaker from a bewildered K-Jam and immediately tackles Katie and the two ladies go tumbling out of the ring with Panda landing hard on K-Jams slutty fiance. As this is happening Mass begins to rise up and as soon a K-Jammin turns to face him... BOOYA!!! Ma$$Dinero just nailed K-Jam with "My Friend Went To London And All I Got Was This Blood Stained T-Shirt!"... Ma$$ goes for the cover, but there's no refferee!!... Wait... Who's that running down the aisle wearing a referee shirt?... IT'S MULTI BILLIONARE AND CHELSEA FOOTBALL CLUB OWNER ROMAN ABRAMOVICH!! He slides in the ring and makes the count...




    80'000 members of Mass' Masses go stark raving mental at this outcome!!! Panda gets in the ring and together with the victorious Ma$$Dinero they begin celebrating for the fans!*

    Pat: What a great victory for Ma$$Dinero here tonight in front of his hometown fans! Just splendid! And now we finally have PandaMassacre on the JBW roster and it's clear who she has aligned herself with!

    Dudley: This is a travesty! Poor K-Jam! Wait, he's beginning to stir, and he's just getting to his feet now... He obviously doesn't know what hit him.

    Pat: Oh, he see's Panda and I think it's all coming back to him now... Wait, he's getting in Pandas face... What does he think he's doing... He just pushed her, but, OH DEAR!! Panda just kicked K-Jammin in the BALLS!! K-Jam is down again clutching his three peice suite!

    Dudley: What's wrong with these Brits!?!? They're going NUTS!!

    Pat: That was probably the worst choice of words possible, Duds.. Well, for K-Jam at least!... Well done, Ma$$Dinero, and welcome to JBW, Nikki Belzova!!!!!
    Dave: What are your thought's watching that back?

    KJ: Fucking disgusted, that psycho bitch Panda should have never stepped foot in JBW. Now in that match, I admit I underestimated Mass but I know he certainly underestimated me, and that match could have easily gone either way. Was gutted I lost, I knew it meant I would fall down in the rankings system, so there was only one thing I could do. Continue to make Mass's life hell until I got a rematch.

    Dave: Now you did indeed get your rematch, and after yet another brutal lead up, the two of you finally met at the biggest PPV of the year, Rampage of the Titans, and you two had one of the best matches in professional wrestling history. What do you remember of that night?

    KJ: Best night of my life, bar none. I went through a gruelling 3 Stages of Hell match with Mass, beat him, and by the end of the night im the fucking World Champ!

    Dave: Now im gonna show you a clip of what happened after your match with Mass, and I want you to tell me what was going through your mind...

    Pat: And there you go guys, we still have one more of these left before the end of the night, and of course Jammin wit’ K-Jammin as well. I tell ya man, it’s great looking back at these old shows again. It really brings back memories.

    Dudley: Hell yeah, I was so fat back then!!

    Pat: You’re still fat. We were different back then though. I think we’ve gotten a lot better as time’s gone on. Hate to pat myself on the back but…*pat pat*

    Dudley: There’s something we can both agree on. What do we have up next Pat?

    Pat: Up next is a commercial break, but after that it’s nothing but action from here on out, just like every second of every minute of every segment of every Mayhem. We’ll be right back!

    *commercial break*

    **Back from commercial now, and Daniel truth is shown backstage looking for roland butters**

    Truth: Butters there you are you slimy prick, come with me to the ring. I want an interview.

    Butters: I'm on my lunchbreak man, come back later.

    Truth: Who the hell takes lunch 9:30 at night? Besides, does it look like i give a shit? I want an interview piggy.

    Butters: Alright alright hold your panties on ill do it.

    Truth: No holding on, we're going right now.

    **Daniel Truth grabs Roland Butter by the shirt collar, and takes him out to ringside.*

    Daniel Truth's music plays and the crowd goes nuts for their TV champion

    *Daniel Truth is limping to the ring but, he's got a look of quasi confidence about him as he continues to drag Roland by his shirt cover. He drapes the Mayhem Television Championship over his shoulder while he makes his way to the ring. It takes him a moment to get through the ropes but, when he does the crowd pops for him. He smiles a weary smile and grabs a mic from a stage hand and tosses it to Roland.*

    Butters: Hello everyone im here with none other than Daniel Truth, now daniel personally deman-...erm, "requested" this interview so lets get into it. Truth, lets talk about your match Sunday.

    Truth: Well as you all know im not 100%. Hell im not even 50% but it will not stop me defending my title against Sandman. And butters, I'm going to prove all the doubters wrong and retain my title. I guarantee it.

    Butters: Strong words Daniel. Now tell me, what does the mayhem tv title mean to you?

    Truth: Well but', I've been asked this so many times over my reign, and not just by interviewers but by fans and even fellow wrestlers, but the answer is still the same: the Mayhem TV title is my means everything to me.

    Butters: Well thanks for that Truth, now back to lunch for me.

    truth: Hold on porky, I'm not...

    * While Truth is looking at Roland in disgust, all of a sudden the lights flicker and then go out. The Sandman's music is booming throughout the arena. Not JABETron, just music. Lightning, and smoke begin to fill the ring and Daniel Truth begins to wildly swing around as if fighting an invisible monster. Daniel makes his way out of the smoke and the Television Championship that was around his shoulder is no longer there. He has a look of utter confusion on his face and is askig the crowd where it is. All of a sudden a spotlight appears and the Mayhem Television Championship is being held up by a seemingly invisible force at the entrance ramp. Over the arena, Sandman's voice begins to bellow as his music stops.*

    Sandman: "Do you see Daniel Truth? I've literally taken your most prized possession right from under your nose. There's nothing that will stop me. You should listen to those who murmer and quietly talk. The rumblings have been said that I cannot be stopped. Those rumors are correct Daniel Truth. I cannot be stopped.

    You've thrown your best at me, ignored my warnings, ignored why I'm after you. You have this delusion that I'm some sort of maniacal being hellbent on just taking you out. That is the farthest thing from the truth as possible, Daniel Truth. The only thing I have ever wanted you to realize is how insignificant you truly are in a world of giants. This Sunday at New Horizions, I will become the new Mayhem Television Champion... and there's nothing you, nor anyone else can do about it. My plans will not be unfurled, and you are just but a stepping stone."

    *The lights come back up, the smoke and lighting instantly disappear, the Television Championship drops and smacks the entrance ramp with a thud. Daniel Truth runs out of the ring and up to his Championship. He cradles it in his arms and walks away from the crowd slowly while he makes his way to the back.*

    Pat: Wow that was intense. I think Roland Butter is literally petrified right now. He might have had a damn heart attack for all we know.

    Dudley: Sandman just basically said I can take your title whenever I want to Daniel Truth, and he might just be right.

    Pat: Well I would've said otherwise a couple weeks ago, especially after I saw what he did to Sandman in those epic backstage brawls, but now that Truth is less than 100%, then it's gonna be an uphill climb to say the least. Well guys, we have to move on now… part three of Mass’s interview is coming up right now!
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 04:00 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  7. #627
    Roland: Why do you always say cuck, instead of the F-Word?

    Ma$$: What the cuck?!? Haha, theres a story there, involving a certain world champion of the promotion that shall not be named, and a desertion that many to this day can't or won't forgive. I have forgiven my buddy a long time ago, and am pleased that he is finally the champ of that place. But, for old times sake.. One last time.. Cuck Filver Sena. Next cucking question. Make it a sensible one.

    Roland: How does it feel knowing that you and Siaki both lost in the same night to K-Jam?

    Ma$$: What? Who wrote those questions for you? K-Jam himself? Wait, he did, didn't he? *Roland shakes his head.* I said he did. Didn't. He? *Roland nods. Ahahaha.. The little chancer. Alright then, I'll play along. Its hurtful Roland. Its hurtful because its in the past, and theres nothing I can do to change what happened. Its a piece of history now, and I can't change the fact that everybody knows that fact. Revenge at New Horizons is my only hope of eradicating that memory, or at least giving my Ma$$es a better memory. One they can watch over and over again once it comes out on DVD and Blu-Ray.

    Rolland: How wise was it to-

    Ma$$: From now on, I want you to start each question with, "K-Jam asks"... Got it?

    Roland: *Nods. Clears throat.* K-Jam asks, how wise was it to break up V3? With him and Roman still being as tight as ever, you're twice as likely to catch a beat down, now that you're alone.

    Ma$$: Who says I'm alone? Just because the need for V3 to be around is no longer necessary, doesn't mean I still don't have friends. Friends in high places too, and a little bird told me a word and I've got a clue as to what the stipulation is going to be. Lets just say, I hope K-Jams feeling fit.

    Roland: Nam- oops, I mean, K-Jam asks, can you please name ten things about yourself that you hate.

    Ma$$: Haha! No. But I can tell you ten things I hate about him.

    1 -- When he's not standing behind men, he's hiding behind women.

    2 -- He got Dave arrested.

    3 -- He shagged Daves soon to be ex-wife.

    4 -- He once keyed my limo.

    5 -- He joined The Eye.

    6 -- He shook my hand at Rampage of the Titans, but he still had the nerve to take liberties, like, half an hour later.

    7 -- He doesn't shower before matches.

    8 -- He once put me in a headlock and said "Smell my finger."

    9 -- He knows where Romes is.

    10 -- He got George fired.

    11 -- He used a golf club to beat me.

    12 -- He hangs around with you, Rolland.

    13 -- He beat up Dave.

    14 -- He makes hilarious jokes at my expense. Hilarious.

    Roland: OK, that's quite enough, K-Jam did ask you to only name ten after all.

    Pat: Hahaha. The “ten” things Mass hates about K-Jammin. That was classic! I laughed my ass off at number 8. I believe him too. Ahh good times.

    Dudley: *mockingly* hehehehehe. We’ll see who has the last laugh come this Sunday. Let’s move on, I’m sick of hearing about Mass all the damn time.

    Pat: Well fine, I won’t bring up Mass one time in this next match, but only if it makes you shut the hell up about it.

    Dudley: Deal.

    Match 4: Lucy vs. Katie vs. Marie

    Pat: Chick fight time!!

    Dudley: Hell yeah. Three ht babes rolling around the mat in scantily clad outfits, and two of them are sisters!! Yum.

    Pat: Ughhh. What a creeper.


    Pat: Here comes Marie, and duds she has a huge match coming up this Sunday at New Horizons. Nikki Belzova has been nothing short of unbeatable thus far, but do you think this match up now will end up helping or hurting Marie’s chances.

    Dudley: Well I think as long as there’s no injuries that it should help her. It’d give her a big boost of confidence going into the match if she can pick up the win.

    Pat: Good points.


    Pat: Here comes Katie down the aisle, and Duds I think she needs to start watching her back now. She might not be The Devil’s Rejects priority number one, but she is up there.

    Dudley: Yeah I agree. AngrySamoan can’t be there 24-7 and even if he could, what could he do against all of TDR?

    Pat: Regardless of that though, Katie needs to focus on this match and picking up a big win here tonight.


    Pat: And last but not least, the champ’s girl, Lucy. Lucy has been struggling a bit as of late, but if she can pick up the win right her it’ll help her get off the schneid. This one is underway.

    (ignore postmatch) Pat: And Marie picks up this solid win here tonight. Dudley I think you might be right, this was a big confidence booster for her heading into New Horizons. Nikki is gonna have her hands full with Marie.

    Dudley: She’ll have more than her hands full Pat, she’s gonna get her pretty little behind handed to her.

    Pat: Well I don’t know about that, but I do know it’s time now for the epic conclusion of our 4 art series with K-Jammin and Dave, and we’re gonna kick things off with a clip of what happened at the end of Mass vs. K-Jammin, 3 stages of hell.

    Pat: These guys have hit each other with everything they have

    Dudley: Twice!!

    Pat: And yet they still keep fighting... Wait a minute, K-Jams picking up that nine iron, he swings it aaaann.

    Dudley: OH NO!! I think Mass nailed "My Friend Went To London And All I Got Was This Blood Stained T-Shirt!" at the same time as K-Jammin struck him with that golf club, but.. YES K-Jammin has his arm draped over Mass' chest... 1....... 2...... THREEEEEEE!!!! YEEEESSSSSS!!!

    Pat: What a match ladies and gentlemen.. What a match!! That was one for the ages, Duds, and a great way to end the feud. K-Jammin showed me he was more than just a sleazy womaniser with that vicious performance!

    Dudley: When you're facing a guy like Ma$$Dinero you have to be on your toes, and my saviour was definitely on his toes tonight!!

    *Referees and EMT's fill the ring and begin tending to Mass and K-Jam. The referees begin to help Mass to his feet but he pushes them off. K-Jam does the same to a pair of EMT's who were attending to a nasty cut above his right eye. Mass slowly hobbles over to K-Jammin, who is also now on his feet, albiet rather shakily. Once they are eye to eye, the crowd gasp, as they think things are going to get violent again. Having gained a lot of new fans with this performance the crowd begin chanting "LETS GO K-JAM... MA$$-DIN-ER-O.. LETS GO K-JAM.... MA$$-DIN-ER-O.."
    They break out into an all mighty cheer as Mass extend his hand, and K-Jammin shockingly takes it in his own and shakes it whole heartedly. Ma$$ raises K-Jams hand and points at him, nodding his head in approval. Mass leaves the ring and K-Jammin celebrates to a loud ovation.*

    Dudley: I-I'm confused!

    Pat: What a show of class. Wow, I never expected that!
    Dave: Now, was that a genuine handshake?

    KJ: At the time, yes it was. But something happened, as I was standing there with the crowd chanting my name I couldn't help but think about the times they said I would never amount to anything in this sport. I was thinking about the times they would laugh at me, and thinking about no matter how loud there cheering for me, they will never cheer for me as loud as they cheer for Mass. So I thought Fuck 'em! If they ain't gonna respect me as much as Mass, then make them hate. So i went backstage to get showered so I can go to my hotel, when I was approached by Iron Ape with an offer I couldn't refuse, then BAM! I was the Heavyweight Champion of the World.

    Dave: So if you look at it, it's Mass 1 K-Jammin 1. Is this the final time we will see you two go at it?

    KJ: Well, if Mass does manage to beat me for the title then you bet your fucking balls im getting my rematch. But if I retain my title, it will be the last chance Mass gets.

    Dave: K-Jammin, thank you very much for your time.

    Dudley: I feel like standing up and uploading. That was some of the best stick work I’ve seen in a long time.

    Pat: Best stick work I’ve seen since Mass’s last promo. Haha. Seriously though guys, looking back on things now I don’t think there’s any doubt in my mind that K-Jammin vs. Massdinero has been the feud of the year for Mayhem. Hell maybe JBW. Hell, maybe all of professional wrestling could take a backseat to K-Jammin vs. Mass, and I for one am ecstatic that this match is finally for a the top prize. It’s been well deserved.

    Dudley: I actually agree with that, as much as I hate Mass, and I do hate Mass, it’s great to see these two go at it in Mayhem’s main event. K-Jammin beating Mass one last time will be as sweet as sugar.
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 04:09 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  8. #628
    Match 5: The Silver Bros vs. Silva and Nightwolf

    The Silver Bros

    Pat: And here come the Silver Bros, getting ready for this non-title match-up against two of the heist ranking members of The Devil’s Rejects, Silva and Nightwolf.

    Dudley: Pat, I gotta tell ya, after what Silva and Nightwolf had to say earlier tonight, I don’t think The Silver Bros should be forced to compete here tonight. Nightwolf and Silva aren’t out to win this match, they just want to soften up The Silver Bros before their bosses get their title shot. It isn’t fair.

    Pat: Well, The Silver Bros agreed to this match, so I don’t know what to tell ya. They should know by now The Devil’s Rejects always have an agenda, and that they would most certainly be looking for some revenge after what The Silver Bros did on the last show.

    Silva and Nightwolf

    Pat: Here come NightWolf and Silva, and they are wasting little time making their way to the ring. This slugfest is underway right now!

    *Nightwolf has Silverdust lined up for a spear, and he connects. Silverdust rolls out of the ring and SilverLace checks on him.

    * The Silver Bros are going over to the timekeepers station and pick up a pair of steel chairs.
    Nightwolf and Silva catch what their doing and go on the attack. The Silver Bros are reeling now, until Silverlace gets a little separation and hits Silva with a chair. Now SilverLace slams Nightwolf with a chair. Both Silva and Nightwolf are now laid out, and this match is over*

    Pat: Wow I was not expecting that at all! The Silver Bros just basically threw out this match and went took out Silva and Nightwolf. I would’ve thought it would’ve been the other way around.

    Dudley: That’s right Silver Bros! Finally someone is standing up to these guys on Mayhem.

    *The Silver Bros get in one more shot each with the chairs, and throw them down on their opponents before walking confidently to the back*

    Pat: Well The Silver Bros once again pulled a fast one on TDR, switching the roles on Silva and Nightwolf and laying them out. Silva and Nightwolf pick up the win via DQ, but The Silver Bros get the last laugh in this one. Well fellas, I’m sad to see it come and go so soon, but Mass’s four part epic is coming to a head right now. I gotta tell ya, listening to these interviews has been the highlight of my night. They really were quite entertaining. But enough about me, it’s all about Mass right now.

    Roland: K-Jam asks, what's with the obsession with midgets? He then goes on to say, I brought out Midget Ma$$ to embarrass you, but for some weird reason you embraced the little cunt. Why!?!?

    Ma$$: Haha! I had to save the little fella from the evil K-Jams clutches... Haha! Look, midgets are hilarious. Everything they do is funny, and no matter what they do they're doing it while being a midget. If he's midget dancing, he's a dancing midget. If they're a wrestler, they're a midget wrestler. If he's a rapper, then, yep! He's a midget rapper. There's no escaping it. They also make great accessories when going clubbing. I used to dress Midget Ma$$ up exactly the same as me, and go out drinking. Trust me, Midget Ma$$ knew how to draw in the ladies. He wasn't really retarded, and he didn't really say cuckity cuck all of the time. That shit was just a work to help him sell his action figures. At one point the Midget Ma$$ toy with the built in "Cuckity Cuck Cuck!" feature was outselling the KJam and Lucy two pack three to one! But like all things that are kinda annoying at first, then get used so much it becomes engrained into society until it just becomes annoying again -like Crazy Frog- he was never gonna have a ling career. Terrible Ted mauled him at the right time, because if he didn't do it, you can be pretty sure someone would have soon enough.

    Roland: K-Jam asks this last two part question. Are you fucking mental? Do you realise what you're getting yourself into?

    Ma$$: Mental? Aren't we all? Like, as grown men who pretend to hurt each other we must all have a few prob-

    Roland: No shooting Ka- I mean Ma$$, please.

    Ma$$: OK, mental? What like Alpha dog murdering his psychiatrist mental, or Kevin Mathews ever thinking he's gonna get back in the big leagues, kinda mental? And, yes; I fully comprehend the severity of the situation ahead of me, and, again, yes, I know this means I'm gonna be in for a rough time at New Horizons. Right now K-Jammin in the best in JBW.

    Roland: Ka- I mean Ma$$, I said no shooting!

    Ma$$: Now who's the one acting mental? If you want me to start shooting, I can call back The A-Team and we can do some real fucking shooting, t'rastclart! *Turns to the camera.* K-Jam, the question isn't do I know what I'm getting myself in for, as I clearly know - I lost the last time we fought! The question is, do YOU know what your getting yourself into? Bruv, I'm coming out swinging, and there's a one hundred percent chance of me connecting. You may be great in that ring, but, on November the sixth, I'm gonna be greater. This chapter in our epic war belongs to me. Trust me, my brother told me. This interview ting is done, blud!

    *Ma$$ walks off screen. The camera stays focused on Roland. Suddenly a chair comes flying on screen and nails Roland in the head - knocking him off of his own chair. Ma$$ can be heard laughing loudly, and the screen fades to black.*

    Pat: And there you have it folks. Our 8 part series of the K-Jammin and Mass interviews is over and done with, and it’s time to move on to our main event. We can only hope it will be as entertaining as the rest of the show has been.

    Main event Chainsaw and Samson vs. The Sleeper and Damian Icarus


    Pat: Here comes Samson and Chainsaw, and man just stepping through the curtain these guys are impressive.

    Dudley: There’s no doubt about that. They certainly have a presence about them like few others do, but they’re not unbeatable. These guys have only teamed up together once before I believe. It was a victory, but still.

    Damian Icarus

    Pat: Here comes Damian Icarus out to a big pop from the crowd, but I wanna go back to what you were just saying. Yes Samson and Chainsaw have only teamed together once before, but the team of Icarus and Sleeper have obviously never teamed before. What do you think that means for this match?

    Dudley: I think it means Saw and Sam should be favorites. Although honestly, even if Sleeper and Icarus had teamed before, I’d still say that. Samson and Chainsaw are just on another level than those two are right now, and I’m not afraid to admit that even though I hate those guys.

    The Sleeper

    Pat: Ah but this guy is the X factor in my opinion. He’s a guy who’s been on such an amazing roll as of late that I think he can beat anybody. Sleeper is as focused now as he’s ever been in his career, and is ready to take that next step to get to the level of a Samson or a Chainsaw or a MassDinero.

    Pat: Samson is all over Icarus right now, stomping him so hard that at any moment I think Icarus’ chest can cave in. Samson now rolls Icarus out to the floor and looks over, well, to us.

    Dudley: I—I don’t want any trouble Samson.

    Pat: Samson doesn’t care about us Dudley, he just wants to use our table I think. Either way we have to move!

    *Samson rips off the plastic cover and the monitors from the announce table, and he finds Icarus. The ref goes out to stop Samson from whatever he’s planning, and running down the ramp is BodomInvader. BI pulls the unsuspecting Sleeper down from the ring apron by his feet, and Sleeper spins around and eats a bitchslap. BI then runs away as hard and as fast as he can, with Sleeps giving chase. Meanwhile Samson lifts Icarus up and Alabama slams him hard on the outside of the ring. Samson then throws Icarus back in the ring and tags in Chainsaw. Chainsaw picks up Icarus’ lifeless body and hits his finishing move, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. He goes for the cover and gets the 1,2,3*

    Pat: Samson and Chainsaw win the match, but BI cost Sleeper a chance to break up that pinfall. I can’t say BI cost Icarus and Sleeper the match, but I will say it cost them a chance. There’s no way anyone can beat Samson and Chainsaw two on one, and Icarus is no exception. You can’t blame Sleeper for this one either. The man got bitchslapped by his arch rival, what do you expect him to do?

    *Sleeper runs back through the curtain only to find Samson and Chainsaw standing in the ring victorious. Sleeper is obviously frustrated in himself for letting his emotions get the best of him, and walks to the back flustered*
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 04:17 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  9. #629
    Pat: See what I mean. Sleeps is upset at himself, but I don’t think there’s anyone amongst us that wouldn’t have done exactly what he did.

    Dudley: But that’s smart by BI Pat. Very smart. He’s in The Sleeper’s head, which is exactly what he wants.

    Pat: I hate to agree with you, but that might be true. However BI just may be succeeding in pissing Sleeper off, and then he can have even more motivation to finally stick it to BI. We have to take one last commercial break guys, but once we come back we’re going to have a very special edition of Jammin wit’ K-Jammin.

    Dudley: This is gonna be great!

    *commercial break*

    Pat: We’re back from commercial now, and before we get into Jammin with K-Jammin, we’e gonna take a look at the final card for New Horizons. On the WARFare side of things the card shapes out like this:

    Tad Locust Vs Alpha Dog

    Connor Chaos Vs NightWolf

    Tag Gauntlet (Serra and JMan, 'air-'bu, ICM and RJ, The Nasty Crew, Gods Grace, Two of a Kind.) for the WARFare tag titles.

    HolyJose Vs Malcolm Cage

    Lenny Ray Vs Black Tear

    Zeus Apollo Vs Prophecy (I Quit match)

    Serra Vs JMan for the WARFare World Championship

    Dudley: And for Showdown it shapes up like this:

    Caesar Vs RedruM

    G-Scorp Vs Avidco

    Sully and Broc Vs Ariel and Loki

    Daniel May Vs Shining Light for the Showdown Heavyweight Championship

    R(ob) vs. Kevin Matthews

    Pat: And finally, for Mayhem we have this:

    Sleeper Vs BodomInvader

    AngrySamoan Vs Silva

    Jackasses Vs Anomander Rake and Demonic

    Nikki Belzova Vs Marie

    Polly Vs ???

    Sandman Vs Daniel Truth for the Mayhem TV championship

    Samson and Chainsaw Vs The Silver Bros for the Mayhem Tag-Team championship

    KJam Vs Mass for the Mayhem World Championship

    Dudley: And that’ll do it for New Horizons. It should be an outstanding sh-

    Pat: Hold on a minute there sparky. I was waiting for this moment to announce this, but a little while ago I was told in my ear-piece that one last match was gonna be added to the card, and finally we’re gonna have Rob Rage get his hands on MPH, as those two will most certainly be going at it this Sunday!

    Dudley: What?? Unfair! When did you hear about this and why wasn’t I informed.

    Pat: Haha. That’s for me to know and you to never find out. Jammin with K-Jammin is coming up right now!

    K-Jammin’s music hits!

    *Out he comes wearing the brand new K-Jammin shirt that read's "Ma$$ isn't worthy" and on the back it simply reads "Ma$$ = Cunt"*

    KJ: Yes it's that time again, Jammin with K-Jammin! If it wasn't for this show, you people may aswell blow your dumb fucking brains out, because you have nothing else to look forward to in your lives. But today's show should satisfy your needs for at least a few months, you people think im a pussy right? You all think im scared of Mass? Well you can all go fuck yourselves, because today's guest is... MassDinero!

    Ma$$’s music hits

    Pat: Oh dear. Who's idea was it to have these two in the ring at the same time!?

    *Ma$$Dinero walks out onto the stage to a deafening pop. After a few moments of absorbing his Ma$$es cheers and adulation, he begins his decent down the ramp. Once in the ring he stares a hole through the Mayhem World Heavyweight Champion.*

    K-Jammin: Don't look at me lik-

    *Suddenly K-Jammin is interupted by the head writer for Mayhem xStraightxEdgexSaviorx. Looking a bit tired, and very overworked, Straights is holding a mic.*

    xStraightxEdgexSaviorx: Wow, guys, I can't begin to tell you two how proud I am of you. Here you are, the two biggest draws on Mayhem, getting ready to go at it again on PPV. And for the richest prize that Mayhem has to offer - congratulations... But, what with all the crazy preparations, I, kinda, forgot to add the stipulation for you match, guys. See, you've faced each other in all sorts of matches that have above all tested your stamina, but, no match you've ever been in will prepare you for this match.. Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to announce that the Mayhem World Heavyweight Championship match will be an... IRON MAN MATCH!!

    *The crowd go crazy at the thought of seeing these two in the most gruelling match that wrestling has to offer.

    Ma$$ is smiling at the thought - K-Jam is livid.

    K-Jammin then points to his T-Shirt, and points out the individual words.




    Ma$$ grabs K-Jam by the front of his T-Shirt, and in one clean movement, he rips it off!

    K-Jammin slaps the taste out of Ma$$Dinero's mouth!

    Ma$$ responds with a slap of his own, and brings him to the floor with a double leg takedown.

    He mounts him begins pummeling him in a fury of punches.

    He starts to throw wild looking hammerfists!

    One misses, and K-Jammin manages wriggle his way out, and traps Ma$$ in his guard.

    He traps Ma$$' left arm, and catches him in a triangle choke hold.

    Ma$$ looks like he is begining to fade, but in a Herculean show of strength he rises to his feet, and with his arm still trapped, he lifts K-Jammin off of the floor - high into the air.

    He runs him into the corner and smashes his back into the top turnbuckle, spins around and slams him hard into the mat!

    K-Jammin is down, but the effort of the move also causes Ma$$ to stay down too.

    Ma$$ slowly gets to his feet, and stomps the champion.


    He goes for a third stomp, but K-Jammin quickly rolls out of the way and punches Ma$$ in the back of his leg, bringing him down to one knee.

    K-Jam gets to his knees and the pair begin trading punches.

    After a few punces each, Ma$$ swings an elbow that connects with K-Jammins jaw, sending blood flying.

    K-Jam's head flys back, and he brings his hand to his mouth - he wipes the blood from his lip, and smears blood accross his face.

    He then responds with a sick elbow of his own which connects with Ma$$Dinero's nose -- crunch!

    They trade more wild punches.

    Ma$$ grabs K-Jammin by the neck and begins squeezing with all of his strength.

    K-Jam's eyes begin to bulge, and his face starts to go red.

    On the stage xStraightxEdgexSaviorx is flapping his arms around going crazy -- he doesn't want to see his main event fall apart before the day of the PPV, and he begins motioning for someone to come and separate the two.

    Six referees run down to the ring and try their best to separate them.

    HeadJam to a referee!

    "MFWTLAAIGWTBTS" to a referee!





    The referees are down!

    Straights -now half way down the ramp- is beside himself. He begins gesturing again towards the locker room, and suddenly members of the roster -babyfaces and heels alike- begin pouring through the curtain. Within thirty seconds the every member of the Mayhem roster is in the ring, and they have managed to finally separate the Mayhem main event and prevent them from killing eachother before Sunday.*

    The scene is one of chaos and the show decsends into MAYHEM... JBW
    Last edited by xStraightxEdgexSaviorx; 11-07-2011 at 04:23 AM.
    WWE resigned Punk, and everything I've said has come true on these things, so WWE, keep Punk a badass face. He will become a legend if you do.

    JBW is so good, even the most cynical member of the IWC couldn't complain about it. Check out or most recent shows here!

    And join in on the discussion here. We will welcome you with open arms. Please join now by PMing me or WWTNA Mark!

    Horror movie tournament final: The Shining vs. Silence of the Lambs vs. Halloween...coming very soon.

  10. #630
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    This was a great show.


    I loved it.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

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    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
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    Bodom is our John Cena.
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    I hate you.
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    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    You can choke on a big bag of dicks, good sir.



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