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  1. #361
    God Dubs's Avatar
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    Main event: RomanFlare vs Psycho Siaki for the Mayhem World title

    The challenger--weight 190 lbs, standing 6 foot even, wearing a toga made of baby polar bears, ROMAN FLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!

    A series of intricate fireworks, in various shades of red and orange, light up the stage. As the pyro settles, a giant caravan of men in toga walk through the curtain, carrying a large platform. RomanFlare is sitting atop a throne on the platform, wearing a deep purple toga and a wreath of laurels on his head. The men carry Rome down to the ring, kneeling down so he can walk from his throne straight into the ring. Rome is carried past the section of fans where his entire class of students are in attendance.

    RomanFlare throws his wreath out of the ring and slowly distogas, laying it in the hands of one of the caretakers.

    Dudley: What an entrance! This man is the next champion or I kiss Roland Butter full on the mouth!

    Pat: When Siaki walks out of here stiil the champ I am SOOOO gonna take a photo of that kiss and post it on FaceBook!

    IT'S THE BEST CHAMPION THIS COMPANY HAS EVER KNOW... SORRY SNAIR, BUT IT'S TRUE

    Pat: Who cut the lights?

    Dudley: Man, I'm getting a sore back from hiding under the desk so much! Curse this Nyctophobia!

    Pat: Pussy.

    *Tiki torches light up from the stage all the way down the ramp.. A group full of men with traditional Samoan tattoos and clothing come out and begin a Samoan war chant.. Siaki walks through to the middle of the ramp and all the torches go out.. When the lights come back on Siaki is face to face with a very surprised Roman Flare..*

    Pat: Oh boy! This one is underway!



    Pat: What an absolutely classic match we have just witnessed. An absolute five star spectacular if ever I have seen one. BOTH MEN deserve the standing applause that they are recieving right now.

    Dudley: Fantastic match, but the wrong man still won.

    Pat: And it's going to be fantastic seeing how many people post their LOL's @ the picture I'm going to post on FaceBook of you kissing Roland Bu-

    It's Iron Ape... What the Hell does he want?

    *Iron Ape walks out onto the stage, and he is joined by Chainsaw, The new Appostles and The Silver Bros. He speaks.*

    Iron Ape: No no no no no no! Siaki, if the rumours are true, there ain't NO FACKING WAY I'm letting you leave that ring with that belt tonight.... So, without any further fuss, Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you, the NEWEST MEMBER OF THE EYE!!!

    IT'S K-FUCKING-JAMMIN!!!

    Dudley: YES!! I knew he was just faking it earlier!

    Pat: From experience?

    *K-Jammin slowly walks out onto the stage, and The Eye members part to allow him through. K-Jam slowly limps down the ramp and The Eye follow after him. Siaki is in the ring and he is staring a hole right through K-Jammin, who suddenly begins running towards the ring. He slides under the ropes, and is met by a Siaki boot! The Psychotic World champion grabs K-Jam by the skull and pulls him to his feet, before hoisting him up for a gorilla press and launches him over the top rope onto The Eye who topple like bowling pins!*

    Pat: That was awesome, Du- OH NO! ROMAN HAS JUST STRUCK THE CHAMP WITH A LEAD PIPE!! Wait.. Was that the ring bell?


    *Chainsaw lifts K-Jammin off of the floor and hurls him through the ropes. K-Jam makes a mad scramble to the unconcious Siaki and makes the cover.*

    Dudley: Yes yes yes yes! ONE... TWO.... THREEEEE!!! K-JAMMIN IS THE NEW MAYHEM WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION AND HE DID IT ALL BY HIMSELF!!!!

    Pat: This is the biggesty travesty in JBW history.... I'm out of here

    *Pat throws his headset down and walks out of the arena.*

    Dudley: GOOD! We don't wan't you out here anyway! We're not worthy.... We're not worthy.

    *The Silver Bros hoist K-Jammin onto their shoulders and the Mayhem World Heavyweight Tag Team Champions parade around the NEW Mayhem World Heavyweight Champion... K-Jammin!*
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-05-2011 at 07:01 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by John Cena rapping on Paul Heyman
    You see I don't need your approval Paul. I'm gonna take my respect. I'll bounce you quicker than an ECW check.

  2. #362
    God Dubs's Avatar
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    *Siaki is shown walking backstage and his face says it all. He comes accross Romans students working out.*

    *Siaki performs one violent move after another on Rome's students, breaking bones and rupturing internal organs. The fans gasp as the camera turns to show RomanFlare who quickly turns his back and can be heard saying, "go go go!".
    As soon as he finishes those words, Siaki is surrounded by Chicago's finest and after a quick scuffle, where a couple of the officers arms were broken, Siaki is taken down to the floor, handcuffed and thrown in a police wagon in the space of a minute. The sirens are on as the wagon race's off. RomanFlare is shown chuckling to himself to end the show.*


    Dudley: Oh my god! What did we just see here? Ladies and Gentleman, this is Dudley Ramirez saying THAT WAS AN AWESOME WAT TO END AN AWESOME NIGHT!! JBW
    Quote Originally Posted by John Cena rapping on Paul Heyman
    You see I don't need your approval Paul. I'm gonna take my respect. I'll bounce you quicker than an ECW check.

  3. #363
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    Mayhem episode 28.



    Pat: Hello, Ladie's and Gentlemen, and welcome to Mayhem!!! We are live from the Hersheypark Arena, in Hershey, Pennsylvania!! Hot off of the heels of a truly epic Rampage of the Titan-

    Dudley: Epic? That word doesn't even begin to cover the magnitude of that show, Pat. Any show that has my, and your, saviour capturing the Mayhem World Heavyweight Championship from the mighty Psycho Siaki, is a ONCE in a lifetime event! That sort of thing only happens when the stars are aligned and the planets are in harmony, Pat, and I hope that he has finally earned your respect.

    Pat: He earned my respect after that brutal Three Stages of Hell match with Ma$$Dinero, but then he went and threw it all down the drain when he joined The Ey- *pauses* OK, my producer, Artie, is asking us to cut this short, and.... Now, I just want to say here, we have received very graphic footage from the trucks. Apparently it's from The Sandman. At Rampage Of The Titans he kidnapped Daniel Truth and threw him into a burlap sack after beating him down. I have been told to warn you that this footage is not for children so please, take them away from the screen.

    Dudley: Thank God that schizo isn't coming near here tonight...

    *The screen goes black.*

    *A video camera begins to flicker on. We see four angles going at once throughout this whole event.*

    *We're focused in a room that has numerous contraptions around it. Barbed wire, fences, traps, it's set up like a maze. In the center of that maze sits Daniel Truth bound and gagged to an electric chair.*

    *A voice can be heard bellowing from around the area.*

    "Your greed has gotten you many accomplishments. You've surpassed many to get where you are right now. That is a crutch. You have taken what should rightfully belong to others. Tonight, you either escape with your life and a new outlook... or you don't escape at all."

    *Lights begin to flash as the straps holding Daniel Truth's hands down are released. He begins to work on his feet. He gets them unwrapped and takes the head piece off. He stands up out of the chair and looks around.*

    "Congratulations. You've passed the first part... now, you must escape the maze before you. Once and if you escape, you must think what life means to you. What greed means to you."

    *While the bellowing voice is talking, Daniel Truth begins to make his way around the maze. With the lights flickering, he's grabbing the barbed wire that's attached to the fences. He becomes a bloody mess.*

    "Now you know the pain of the others. It's a sweet, simple satisfaction. That burning feeling of blade to flesh. How does it feel?"

    *Daniel Truth lets out a loud gut wrenching scream. He begins to shake a nd cry the more and more the barbed wire latches onto his skin. Finally he makes his way close to the end of the maze. His TV Championship is behind a thick layer of barbed wire.*

    "Is it worth it? When you go for it, will it be because of greed... or pride? The choice is yours Daniel. It's up to you how you handle life from here on out."

    *Daniel races head first into the barbed wire and pulls his Championship out. With his arms coming back the barbed wire makes its way deep into his flesh. Blood is everywhere as he collapses for a moment clenching his Championship. As he looks up, a door opens and a white light is glowing.*

    "There's your escape Daniel. Remember, it's your life. Make of it what you will."

    *Daniel Truth flies out of the door into the arms of awaiting EMT's.*

    Daniel: "Why... how... how are you here?"

    EMT Personnel: "We were called. And told to wait here for 45 minutes. If someone didn't come out, we were told to come in."

    Daniel: "Who called you?"

    EMT Personnel: "Someone calling himself The Sandman?"

    Daniel: "Huh... how... weird."

    *Daniel sits in the Ambulance as they begin to work on him.*

    *The camera flickers off and the screen goes black again.*


    Pat: I'll be damned. That was one of the damndest things I have ever seen in my entire professional career. Dudley has been long gone. I don't know what to make of this Sandman guy. The crowd has been silent throughout all of this... we need to take a commercial break.

    *Viewer presses fast forward so's not to be sucked into buying something that they don't need.*

    Pat: Welcome back, Ladie's and Gentlemen, and I'm still feeling a bit shaken up after what we saw before we took a break. Dudley, now that you're back, care to introduce the next segment?

    Dudley: Pat, that was awful. How there are actually people that cheer for this guy is beyond me. Anyway, from one abomination to another. Ladie's and Gentlemen, it is now time for me to remind everybody about Horrorcore Icons this Sunday on PPV. If you believe Kashdinero this is going to be the greatest PPV in history. I can't see it myself, but maybe Kash knows something we don't know.

    Pat: Kash ALWAYS knows something that we don't know.

    Dudley: Whatever. Anyway, here's another reminder of how grusome this event is going to be.



    Dudley: I have to remind everybody that TJ Rage is no longer in this tournament, or JBW for that matter, and will be replaced by Azrael.

    Pat: I have to add another casualty to this tournament. Markus Beerstien. As everybody knows he handed his notice in before Rampage of the Titans, and he will be replaced by none other than TAD LOCUST, who is far better off suited to a tournament like this. It is a shame to see Markus leave us, but I'm sure he will be- *pauses* WHAT! I can't say that! *pauses*... OK, people, Kash is screaming in my ear piece, demanding I say this. I'm appologising in advance/ It is a shame to see Markus leave us, but I'm sure he will be happy as it will give him time to make plenty of gay porn home videos with his brother Hans. Wow, we are so gonna get flooded with complaints after that one! I think we better have our first match of the evening.

    Match one: Helmsley vs Chris Parker.

    Parker is still seething from his loss at Rampage

    Pat: This guys attitude around here has gone from bad to worse. I heard it was because someone in management didn't really care for him, and couldn't understand why he was getting a push. It all kind of went downhill from there.

    Dudley: I was talking to Chris earlier, and he told me all the embarrassment he is feeling right now, from getting beaten up by a wounded man, is going to be taken out on Helmsley here tonight.

    This guy might have something to say about that

    Pat: Here he is, it's "Big Stupid"

    Pat: Does the stuff you say ever get funny? Ladies and Gentlemen.. This one is underway!

    Pat: Oh wow, Dudley, you wasn't kidding! That was devastation. Poor Helmsley really got the stuffing knocked out of him in that one.

    Dudley: When have I ever given you reason to doubt me?

    Pat: I can't believe you have to ask.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
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    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  4. #364
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    Dudley: Asshole. Now, moving on, we have the always brilliant, Roland Butter standing by.

    Roland Butter: Why thank you Dudley, how kind of you. Here with me right now is Pauley Cadillacs and his lovely ladie Ma-

    Pauley: They know who I am ya stupid mick!

    Roland: But of course, Pauley, now, I understand you have an issue with being left off of the card at Rampage of the Titans.

    Pauley: Naturally I am pissed off that I gots left off'a da biggest card in the history of professional wrestling. When Straights told me about this place I tought I was gonna be facing the creme of the crop, but so far I ain't come across one shmuck with the goombas large enough to even make me work up a sweat. I mean, what kind of pissant company are we running here? Well, it's a small blessing for someone's mother that I don't have a match here tonight, but Katies mother is gonna be shedding a few tears after my Maria is through with her, right Maria?

    Maria: You sure do get me going when you talk like that.... *turns to the camera.* So, my opponent tonight is a slut by the name'a Katie? Well like Pauley said, somebody better call her mother, because this broad don't back down from nobody! Even freaked out little bitches who don't know how to keep a man like you, Katie... Ciao bella, see you in the ring!

    Roland: Strong words from The Itallian's. Back to you Dudley


    Dudley: Thanks Roland, that was one Hell of an interview.

    Pat: Are you flirting with Roland? Don't think I've forgot about that kiss you promised.

    Dudley: I lied!

    Pat: No surprise there, Duds. No surprise at all. Lets go back stage

    *The new streamlined Appostles, Anomander Rake, Demonic, and Silva are standing facing the wall, with their backs to the camera. Chainsaw is seen pacing back and forth and he has a demented look in his eyes. He is actually frothing at the mouth and lets out a huge spray when he says.*

    Chainsaw: Last night was supposed to be a glorious occasion. Last night was meant to be a night of triumph for us. With the welcoming of Silva into the fold, last night was meant to be one of family and the bond that we all share.

    Demonic: But.. *turns around to face Chainsaw.* Didn-


    Chainsaw: I SAID DON'T LOOK AT ME RIGHT NOW! Not while I wear this face of dispair. No! I shall not be looked down upon by my minions... Listen up and hear me, my children. Tonight is your chance to please your master, for tonight you have had your tasks laid out before you. Silva. Anomander Rake. It is down to either of you to capture the Horrorcore Title at Horrorcore Icons, on Sunday. Tonight I want to show the world that the competition in that thing stand no chance against my soldiers of war. Bring down a rain of devastation upon your oponents tonight and show the world what Horrorcore is all about. Demonic. It is down to you to teach Aeriel a lesson. It is down to you to scold that dog, before putting him down. To willingly leave The Appostles is to set a death penalty upon oneself. I trust this will be achieved by you here tonight. Now, I shall leave you with this... Don't. Let. Me. Down.

    *Chainsaw leaves the room, and The Appostles each turn around.*

    Chainsaw from outside the room: I SAID NO LOOKING!!

    *The Appostles share a confused glance at one another, and quickly turn back around to face the wall again.*


    Pat: Yeah, that was kind of uncomfortable to say the least. I think it's time for our next match.. Wait. Whats this?
    Ladies and Gentlenerds, the king of Mayhem is live!

    RomanFlare strolls through the curtain dressed in a fine Italian suit, a mic in one hand and a chair in the other. He takes his time walking down the ramp and into the ring, completely ignoring the crowd. As he enters the ring, we can see a pedestal already set up in the ring, something on top of it, veiled under a dark sheet. Rome unfolds the chair and takes a seat, crossing one leg Indian-style.

    Rome: First and foremost, a lot of people ask me why I sit like this. Occam's Razor, folks:
    The simplest answer is always "to make you dumbasses ask questions." Now spit out "yer tebaccy" and open your illiterate ears. I have an important announcement to make and you folks have a front row seat to the explosion that is this announcement. But first, I must comment on what happened at Rampage. What happened to Siaki. He's gone, hoes and nerds. Gone and locked up in some maximum security prison, probably already someone's "special friend". Why? Because Siaki was a monster. A monster that needed to be caged. Did you see what he did to my students? And now, after the pretty solid court case and my witnesses and security tape means that Siaki won't be around for a loooooooooooong time.

    Rome smirks as the crowd reigns him with boos: items can be seen flying towards the ring but never quite making it.

    Rome: Calm down, you inbred idiots! I still have my surprise announcement! You see, gets up, this veiled item is rather important. As you can see, tugs the sheet off, it is a brand new championship. Since I wasn't able to secure the title win last night, because my opponent was a homicidal psychopath and I was scared for my life, I've prepared this beauty.

    Rome hoists the belt onto his shoulder and walks around the ring, strutting, showing it off. He stops in front of the pedestal and points to the Jabetron.

    Rome: But that's not all! I've even got a surprise video for you!



    Rome: WE'RE GOING BRAND, Folks! Showdown THE BRAND! The Yellow Brand! The A-Brand! The Thursday Night delight, the star studded show! And this title is the new SHOWDOWN HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE! And the show is going to start as a brand NEXT WEEK! So tune in Thursday night to see the final Showdown before we go BIG TIME! Now where's my partners?

    Dudley: Oh my god, Pat! This is huge news! SHOWDOWN IS GOING TO BECOME A THIRD BRAND! That must have been the huge announcement that Kash was on about on the Jabe thread!

    Pat: This is indeed huge news, but.. Did he just say partners? Well, Ladies and Gentlemen, I guess it's time for match number three.


    Here comes Romes partners, its... The Silver Bros

    Dudley: It's good to see the Champions back on Mayhem! After their fantastic win over The Kings of Wrestling at Rampage, they are truly flying high... This is going to be great. The Tag champs and the new Showdown Heavyweight Champion! What a team!

    Pat: New champion? This isn't sitting well with me, Duds, I don't think Romes would just declare himself as the champion just like that. Anyway, let's see who their opponents are.

    It's LEEEENNNNNYYYYY LLLIIIGGGHHHTTTNNNIIIGGG!!

    *Lenny struts out on to the stage with a slight spring in his step and strikes his now famous pose... BodomInvader bursts through the curtains, stands alongside Lenny, and strikes a similar pose, but with his trademark goofy grin... "Mr Showdown" HBK then dramatically bursts through the curtain, points at Roman, then points at his waist and mimics shining the Showdown Heavyweight Championship, before striking the same pose as his two partners. As soon as he does a bolt of lightning strkes down just behind them and sends all three of them rolling down the ramp. They pick themselves up, dust themselves off and set off for the ring, when a second bolt of lightning strikes, again just behind them, and it sends them rolling down the ramp, and right up to ringside. They climb into the ring, dust themselves off and prepare for the fight of their lives.*

    Pat: This is my best six man tag team ever! They may be in over their heads, but, wow, am I marking out right now... This one is underway folks.



    Pat: That was an absolute gem of a match! The Eye were too strong for Bee-Eye and the gang, but they sure showed these fans what they are ma- Hey!!

    Dudley: Romes and The Silver Bros are putting a hurting on them, thats uncalled for!.... Of course I'm kidding; this is brilliant! Get 'em boys.

    Pat: Wow, Duds look who just jumped over the ringside barriers. It's The Jackasses!! Wow, Ryder just nailed a springboard dropkick on both of The Silver Bros!

    Dudley: Hey, no fair! This is five on three! Gabo just hit hit a clothesline on Romes.

    Pat: Now Lennys picking him up, and he's holding him, while calling for BodomInvader to hit him.

    Dudley: He hits the ropes aaaannd... YES Romes just ducked! Thats right Romes, get the Hell out'a there!

    *As Romes slides underneath the ropes to the outside, and calls for the Showdown Heavyweight Championship BodomInvader drops to his knees and is shedding real tears as he helps Lenny to his feet. Lenny looks peeved, but he accepts BodomInvaders appologies, and shakes his hand.*

    Dudley: Oooh, sportsmanship. I think I'm gonna puke.

    Pat: Duds we need to go backstage where a brave camera man is following NightWolf.
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-08-2011 at 04:12 AM.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  5. #365
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    *NightWolf is seen walking through a corridor that reads "Kashdinero's office". He boots the door open to reveal Kashdinero sitting at his desk. NightWolf strides in.*

    NW: I'm here to tell you that I am getting sick of all this waiting around! I allowed myself to be left off of the biggest show on the planet, but I can't stand it no mo-

    *NightWolf is interupted by Nikki Belzova, who suddenly pops her head up from under the desk, and wipes her mouth.*


    NW: What the Hell?

    Nikki: What? I was doing my laces up!

    *NightWolf wipes his mouth, mocking Nikki.*

    Nikki: What?!? I drooled.

    *Someone standing behind NightWolf says.*

    "Come on, Nikki, he might be my brother, but even he can't write Siaki back into the storylines... Lets get out'a here."

    *NightWolf spins around to see Ma$$Dinero and St George standing behind him leaning up against the wall. He stares Ma$$ straight in the eye as Ma$$ walks up to him and squares up to him.*

    Ma$$: Now I know you're not going to be starting trouble in my brothers office are ya?

    *NightWolf gives Ma$$ a sinister smile in answer, turns to Kashdinero and says.*

    NW: Someone is getting hurt tonight. Mark my words.

    *With that, he turns and leaves the office, leaving Ma$$, St George and Nikki standing there smiling.*

    Kash: NOW EVERYONE GET THE FUCK OUT! CAN'T YOU SEE I'M STILL WRITING THIS FUCKING SHOW!!!


    *V3 leave the overworked writer and leave.*

    Pat: well that was different. I think it's time for our next match.

    Match three: Anomander Rake and Silva vs Shockmaster and RedDevilSativa- Horrorcore rules

    Dudley: This is going to be a massacre.

    Pat: Yep!

    Here come The Appostles.

    Dudley: Holy $*%+ They have got a wheelbarrow full of light tubes and all sorts of nasty looking things. This really is going to be a massacre!

    Pat: Yep!

    *Shockmaster's music starts then suddenly stops. A second later, Shockmaster and RDS stumble through the curtain, as if they had been pushed.*

    Pat: I wouldn't wanna be these guys right now, that's for sure. The look on their faces is beyond scared. Duds, these two are petrified, and who can blame them. This one isn't gonna be pretty folks, and, yep, it's underway!



    Dudley: Silva up on the tope rope and.. BAM! What a frogsplash. 1... 2... 3, this one is over! Even I was begining to feel sorry for them.
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-07-2011 at 09:04 AM.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  6. #366
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    Pat: If Horrorcore Icons was anything like what we just witnessed, then our hardcore following are gonna love it! Now, after that horrific beating, let's go backstage.

    *Pauley and Maria are walking through a corridor, when they bump into Ma$$ and Nikki.*

    Ma$$: Oh, look who we have here, Nikki. A certain someone who has been, how can I put it... Talking shit!

    Pauley: Hey, take it easy, Maria has a match right now, and we haven't got time for this!

    Nikki: Neither have we, but... Next time.

    *Ma$$ and Nikki both fake a punch at the Italians, who flinch back a touch. The V3 members go about their business, and Pauley and Maria make their way towards the ring.*


    Pat: Wow, that could have turned ugly, real quick. Thankfully it didn't. Lets go to a commercial, and when we get back we'll have a womens match.

    (Com-com-com-er-cial!!)

    Pat: Welcome back, Ladies and Gentlemen. It's time for our womens match of the evening.

    Match four: Maria vs Katie

    Ciao bella!!

    Dudley: This lady is full of class. She's a real talent, for sure. Not like that Nikki Belzova chick. I'll tell ya, Pat, Ma$$ and Nikki are lucky that Pauley and Maria were busy.

    Pat: You're full of shit and you know it.

    Heeeeeerreess Katie!!

    Pat: I can't believe she is still coming out here to K-Jammins music, and look she's even holding a picture of him.

    Dudley: She's not worthy... She's not worthy..



    Dudley: Theres my girl! Maria picks up a great win here tonight, Pat, and you know it!

    Pat: She sure showed us a lot of talent, but she has got to face Nikki somewhere down the line, and thats when her true challenge lies. I'll tell the truth, I don't think she can do it. Wait a minute, Katie's acting awfully strange right now.

    *Katie drops to her knees and begins sobbing into her lap. All of a sudden she looks towards the corner of the ring where she left her photo of K-Jammin, and darts towards it. She then grabs the photo and begins tearing it to shreds. She then throws all of the pieces up into the air, and laughs maniacally as they float down around her.*

    Dudley: I think we just saw a love die, Pat... She seems to be... I dunno, free?

    Pat: I think you're right, Dudley. But she still doesn't seem right.

    Dudley: You can say that again.

    *The camera cuts backstage where we see Demonic walking with a vengence.*

    Pat: It looks like we're gonna have Demonic vs Silva up next. Stay tuned everyone.

    (Laicremoc)
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-07-2011 at 09:05 AM.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  7. #367
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    Match five: Demonic vs Aeriel.

    (Aeriel comes out to no music, partly because the writers haven't decided on his new theme song.

    Pat: Aeriel is a brave brave man, Duds.

    Pat: I think he needs his head checked for sure. As chainsaw said, you don't just quit on the Appostles and get away with it.

    It's Demonic. Mr Demonic to you.

    Dudley: Now, this is a mans man. He's gonna show Aeriel the meaning of pain in this one, no two ways about it.



    Pat: Demonic picks up the win, and, now just hang on a minute! he's continuing the beating.

    Dudley: And now Anomander and Silva have joined him! They're destroying him!

    *The beating continues when Loki runs down the ramp to his friends aid. At first he starts throwing punches towards Anomander but Demonic cuts him off and a three on two beating ensues, until...*

    IT'S SAMSON'S MUSIC AGAIN!

    *The Appostles are frozen in their tracks as the music of the man that was murdered by Chainsaw plays throughout the arena. As soon as it starts it stops, but Loki and Aerial escape the ring while The Appostles are distracted.*

    Pat: This Samson thing is really getting to these guys. Chainsaw must be going balistc backstage!

    *Almost as soon as Pat has said that, the camera switches to Chainsaws locker room where he is throwing around cgairs and smashing Plasma televisions and the like.*

    Dudley: Holy-Cow! Chainsaw is PISSED! I would not wanna be anywhere near this guys vicinity right now.

    Pat: Let's cut to a commercial break, and leave this man and his dementia to himself.

    (I wanna put a funny comment here about Romes, but I'll save it for another time

    Match six: Scottland vs NoBitchAssness.

    Here comes Scottland, back from the hospital that Nightwolf put him in

    Dudley: I sure did miss this guy. NightWolf put a hurting on him two weeks ago, but it takes more than that to stop a Scotsma- OH NO! IT'S NIGHTWOLF! NOT AGAIN!

    *NightWolf runs up behind Scottland grabs him by the back of the neck and rams him into the ringside barriers. He has a calm look about him as he drags the carcass of Scotland up the ramp and on to the stage. He then flips him up on to his shoulder and begins running towards the edge where he leaps off and powerslams him through a table in a scence reminiscient of his actions two weeks ago. NightWolf stands up and recieves a huge ovaition from the crowd.*

    Pat: Oh dear! Poor Scottland may never recover from that brutal powerslam off of the stage.

    *EMT's rush the scene, and security drag NightWolf off, who still has an eerie calm look about him.*

    Pat: Well it looks like match number six is called off.

    *The camera's go backstage to see RomanFlare walking by himself, still carrying the Showdown Heavyweight Championship.*

    Voice off camera: Hey Roman, nice belt.

    *Roman turns around and BOOYA!! Ma$$Dinero hits him with "My Friend Went To London And All I Got Was This Blood Stained T-Shirt!"... Ma$$ doesnt utter a word, but just smirks and walks off.*

    Dudley: What the Hell did we just see?

    Pat: I'd call that payback V3 style.
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-07-2011 at 09:06 AM.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  8. #368
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    Match seven: Wes Goldman vs Brandon Smithston.

    It's Mr Amazing!

    Dudley: Look at this stupid hippy! He can barely walk, but he's still coming out here looking for a fight. What a fool!


    Pat: I'd say he was more than capable of beating Wes. Even in his wounded state.


    Wes. Goldman. Esquire.

    Pat: This guy may be a rich bastard, but all that cheddar couldn't buy him a win over Daniel Truth for the TV title, could it, Duds?

    Dudley: Truth got lucky. Wes'll get him some of Truthy baby, trust me on that one!

    Pat: This one is underway!!



    Pat: Unbelievable! Mr Amazing got the win! Man, there's no stopping this guy as of late. All I can say is, who's next for Brandon Smithston!
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-07-2011 at 09:09 AM.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  9. #369
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
    Join Date
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    *daniel mays music hits. he walks out with an angry look on his face*

    *he goes into the ring and grabs a mic*

    *he pauses for a bit leaning on the ropes*

    Daniel May: YOU KNOW i should be one of the happiest wrestlers alive at the moment. i beat kiddson fair and square 1,2,3 at rampage of the titans....I DID exactley what i said i was going to do and that is win and SHUT KIDDSON UP *fans start to cheer as Daniel May is still pissed* but.....ofcause after what happened last night i have a feeling that this thing between me and kiddson...has just begun *fans cheer louder*after our match he couldint deal with the FACT that i am the better wrestler NO he attacks me...but after all the attacks in the past i should of relized by now hey....then TO.THE.RESCUE...comes G-scorp and he scares off kiddson cause lets face it kiddson cant fight anyone face to face...anyway G-scorp holds my hand up in celebration...*pauses* and then he attacks me...smacking me over the head with a chair and you know i could say OW why would you do that after i brang you into this company...but lets face it he is just like kiddson...SO G-scorp do something kiddson cant do GROW A SET AND FACE ME RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW *crowd pop as daniel may waits impatiently*

    *G-Scorp walks down the ring with the chair used to hit may as he hits the ring*

    G-Scorp: Hay MAY how you doing? *waiting for a response from may but instead gets a look* come on man dont be like that, your acting like this is out of my character... when really it wasnt look ill explain since i was a little boy i wanted to get into the Jay-Bee-Double-U. I did things your way for years trying to be the nice guy being the apple of the managements eyes and where did it get me? complaining about having to pay full price for a jbw ticket and by the way start introducing concession prices please we are not all as rich as may. Anyways i have trained my arse off and showed my mic skills for the past two months outside the arena and nothing, not a word from this company and then as soon as i get noticed what do you do *tone of voice becomes slightly sarcastic* you piggy back of my heat like you did with kiddson just to make a bigger name for yourself and you make it out like you got me into this company *getting more aggressive* with comments like "i brang you into this company" and interviews saying how you been watching me like you are king shit well guess what G-Scorp has ARRIVED in JBW which instantly means Mayhem is now the G-Show but dont worry May i am nothing like kiddson infact im as pissed at kiddson as you are and the reason why i brought this chair out is not to remind you of why you suffering a headache right now, its to use tonight against kiddson because as much as i would like to take out the company mule, you did win last night as you said 1... 2... 3... kiddson couldnt even beat you down post match properly so kiddson you weak as piss no talent stupid son of a bitch *now G-Scorp is really pissed off* get your arse out here and let me sting you like only the G-Scorp because when you act like a bitch the top dog bites and if you dont like that then Come Wit-

    *kiddsons music interrupts*


    (kiddson gets into the ring and singal for a mic)


    Kiddson: Daniel May your right you won at Rott but understand this you won that battle i plan on winning the war! Yeah Daniel May what did you think this was just a one match thing? if so you we're clearly mistaken, i plan on permanently removing you. So this rivary we got is far from over. (kiddson walks around the ring for a little) G-scorp, G-scorp, G-scorp i can respect you for wanting to make a big impact in JBW but you made one big mistake and that was deciding to come out after my match and try to attack me with a steel chair. So the way i see it you were asking for a fight last night and if a fight is what you want then you dont have to look any farther ill come down there and whip your ass tonight! And Daniel May dont get jelious i've got more than enough time to beat your ass too tonight. So what do you say boys lets make this a 3-way match!

    *The bell rings, and the three way dance is underway*


    Pat: This one never even got started! G-Scorp and Kiddson just both began attacking "The International Superstar! They must have been planning this from day one, damn it!

    *As G-Scorp continues putting the boots to May, Kiddson leaves the ring, reaches under it and pulls out a briefcase. From it he pulls out some documents.*

    Dudley: Pat! I think thats their contracts. He's just handed them to G-Scorp.

    Pat: Who JUST TORE THEM UP!! What are these two thinking!?!?!


    *Kiddson and G-Scorp are laughing their heads off as they leave the ring, leaving May on the floor a broken mess.*

    Pat: Ladies and Gentlemen, It's time for move of the week. Anything to get away from these two assholes.

    MOVE OF THE WEEK



    Pat: That move of the week goes to Psycho Siaki in his successful title defense against RomanFlare at Rampage of the Titans. I sure hope Siaki comes back soon.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

  10. #370
    Moderator "The Trinity" Kashdinero's Avatar
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    Dudley: Well, I for one am glad he's gon-

    *The lights go out and St George's music hits. *The crafty cockney stands at the top of the ramp with a spotlight on him, as the whole arena is in darkness, but the crowd give him a huge ovation.*

    SG: Alright my china plates! *Right then, where are we going to start? I have a big announcement to make tonight... But first, lets talk about RAMPAGE OF THE TITANNNNS!!! That's right my Jabesters. What a show it was! I've got mixed feelings about the events that took place last night... But I'll rabbit about that later.

    Now, first off let's rabbit about me, the guv'nor, winning the cockney cage match against Chainy babes. You see Chainy me old fruit gum, as much as a monster that you are, did you really think that you could beat me in a cockney cage match? I mean... Are you zsa zsa Gabor?! I invented this testing and gruesome gauntlet of a match, and I've not lost one yet! That's right folks... So here in the House of Jabe, I've fought two and won two... Making me an undefeated cockney legend... Hahaha... Maybe I'll start a streak?! *Anyways Chainy babes, I kicked your bottle glass so bad last night... Your gonna need some jack n jill's for the Rockford Files I gave ya! *It's over now Chainsaw. *I've proved to everybody, especially you, that I'm better... It ends now, finito.

    But, and there's always a but. When something ends, something has to start.

    *SG starts to walk down the ramp towards the ring, with the spotlight still following him*

    Sg: I said earlier that I had announcement to make. *Well my chinas let's get to it! *Can I get some lights please?!!!!

    As the lights come on George steps into the ring which has a cockney style bar in it, complete with bar stools and English flag bunting.

    SG: welcome chinas... Welcome to COCKNEY CORNERRRRR!!!! *That's right, cockney corner is back here on Mayhem, with me, St George as your host!

    *crowd start cheering COCK-NEY CORN-ER clap clap clap clap clap!*

    SG: Thank you my chinas, thank you. *Now I have a few things I wanna rabbit about this week here on cockney corner, and the first item on the top of the list is... PSYCHO SIAKI!!!!

    *The crowd go absolutely fookin nuts when Siaki's name is called, and the Siaki chants start*

    SG: He's great isn't he?! Now last night Siaks proved to everybody that he's champ material by beating old "anal reform". Match over job done... V3 party here we come?! *Oh no, Baboon boy himself has to get involved and give Gay Rammin a fookin title shot. Siaks got arrested and was taken away to the slammer. *Me, Mass and Panda went to get our julius out, but he was refused bail. Still no word today either. I finding it a little hard to understand right now, so I'm gonna get my first guests out here to help me out. *Ladies & gentleman please welcome to cockney corner... My main julius' Massdinero and Pandamasacre!!*

    *Mass and Panda walk out to a huge pop. But they both look pissed off to say the least. They enter the ring and knuckle bump George. They take a seat on the stools as George pours them a beer*

    SG: There you go chinas, get ya laughing gear round that. *Now, we all saw it, and we're all feeling it today. Any news on Siaks?

    Mass: Ahhh, I haven't had one of these for a while.

    Panda: You had one before you came out here!

    Mass: Exactly!

    SG: So what you're saying is...

    *The entire members of The Eye, barring RomanFlare, are standing at the top of the ramp. K-jamin holding the belt and taunting V3.

    Mass: Come on then you bunch of fucking poomps!

    *The Eye, barring K-Jammin, storm the ring and a huge fracas has broken out. *Bodies are flying all over the place. *But wait! Here's Chainsaw and he's carrying handcuffs! *He enters the ring where The Eye have overpowered V3, and starts to handcuff them to the ropes. *They are really starting to pummel V3 now, and Chainsaw is destroying the Cockney Corner set right in front of George. They beat on them for a minute, until they are all unconcious, Then Iron Ape beckons for his brand new champion to join them. The new World Heavyweight Champion K-Jammin with Lucy, looking even more smug than usua, walks down the ramp. A guy in the front row throws a plastic Coke bottle at him, and K-Jammin spits in his face! He climbs in the ring and hugs Iron Ape*

    KJ:" JBW has been...saved *He raises the Championship Belt to receive tremendous boo's*. I am the NEW World Heavyweight Champion! Now, alot of people are wondering why I joined The Eye at ROTT, so let me tell you why. After me and Mass had match of the fucking century, hell froze over... as you people cheered me. It's funny, all I've ever wanted in this business are two things... money and respect, at that point I already had tons of money, and I finally had respect. But as I was standing there listen to you all chant The Great Saviour's name, I couldn't help but remember all the time's you people wanted my blood! You laughed at me, you mocked me, you said I would NEVER make it! and right there I decided, I have you people in the palm of my hand. I now had the perfect opportunity to fuck you all, and fuck you all I did. You see this guy *put's his arm around Ape* this guy recognized my talent, he knew I was the real deal, the bee's knee's, the main event, THE GREAT FUCKING SAVIOUR! He hand-picked me to be the World Champion, now I don't want people thinking I took a short cut by joining The Eye in order to be World Champion, it was always inevitable. Even if I didn't join The Eye, I would have been World Champion in the next month anyway. Just the thought of you people cheering me makes me fucking sick, you people are the most pathetic bunch of hypocritical pricks I have ever known. This goes to all of you, don't you EVER cheer, chant my name, make a sign with my name on again..."

    *He stops talking as he see's a teenage boy in the front row with a sign reading "K-Jammin Rules" He confronts the boy*

    KJ:" You think I need your fucking sign to let people know I rule, take a look kid... IM WORLD FUCKING CHAMPION! *Starts laughing at the boy* I don't want nor need your support you little spotty faced mug. You don't deserve to worship me *rips up the sign and throws it in his face*

    *Climbs back in the ring*

    KJ:" That goes for all of you, with the exception of Dudley and Roland. All I need is my gorgeous girlfriend, The Eye ... and this *Raises World Heavyweight Championship*


    Pat: There you have it Ladies and Gentlemen, your new Mayhem World Heavyweight Champion..


    Dudley: We're not worthy... We're not worthy... We're not worthy!

    Pat: We'll see you next week everybody, thanks for tuning in JBW
    Last edited by Kashdinero; 09-08-2011 at 03:41 AM.
    Ma$$Dinero... We're shootin' now, bruv!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Kash; calling it 4 years before Robbie.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dennis View Post
    Bodom is our John Cena.
    Quote Originally Posted by A Dismal Jester View Post
    I hate you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Robstar View Post
    #KashBrokeMyBrain
    Quote Originally Posted by TheDevilsAdvocate View Post
    Nerds are awesome though!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wade Barrett 1979 View Post
    Are you going for some kind of sig quote world record?

    #FreeBodom

     

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