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  1. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by K2Jelly View Post
    Classic Nas.

    Highly underrated.
    Further back than that.

    It was a musical in the 70s
    Kaige Chamberlain
    Ballad of an Asshole

    Former RTE Tag-Team Champion(w/ Xavier Hightower[1])
    Current EWNCW Tag-Team Champion (Solo; 3/30/14) [1]
    'Father' Black Angel:
    Preacher of the Voices

    Winner of BotN[Seraphim]

    I'm trying to be number one, why would I settle?
    @IWACreative_Parody Tweeter


  2. #12
    "Life sucks and then you die"

  3. #13
    "You're fired but I'm fightin ya first!"
    "For the Druids' legends are true..."

  4. #14
    The Trinity steveorton's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Blog Entries
    "It is game time" - JR when HHH returned and "I'm that damn good"
    I'm jus sayin...

  5. #15
    "I'm from Winnipeg, you idiot!" - Chris Jericho

    "Enough is Enough and it's time for a change!" - Owen Hart

    "I'll give you a show that you've never seen before. Why? Because I can." - Shawn Michaels

    "What I'd like to have right now is for all you fat, out of shape, San Francisco sweathogs to keep the noise down while I take my robe off and show all the ladies what a real man is supposed to look like." - Rick Rude

    "INDEED!" - Funaki

    "DAMN!" - Ron Simmons

    "Hey, I drank milk that was a day past the expiration date, now that is extreme!" - Kurt Angle

    "Your Olympic Hero is scheduled to wrestle in a match against the man they call the 'Big Red Retard'. And not that I have anything against retarded people, because I don't. As a matter of fact, I have a lot of retarded fans out there that admire and respect your Olympic Champion." - Kurt Angle

    "You left a few things so I brought you a box of your stuff. And since it's your box, appropriately, it's quite large." - Triple H to Stephanie McMahon

    "The only reason you were WWE Champion for almost a year was because Triple H didn't want to work Tuesdays!"- Paul Heyman to JBL

    "I can only have so many maids, I can only have so many gardeners." -JBL

    "That's why I kicked your leg out of your leg" - Owen Hart

    "...Even a 747 looks small when you fly it into the Grand Canyon" Triple H, in reply to Stephanie

    "Also, Hot Topics is looking for their belt, you might wanna give it back to them, but I digress." - Matt Morgan to Jeff Hardy on the Immortal Heavyweight belt.

    "RVD 420 means I just smoked your ass!" - Rob Van Dam

    "God created the Heavens, he created the Earth! He created all the Hulkamaniac! Then, he created a set of 24-inch pythons, BROTHA!!" - Hulk Hogan

    "She's had more hands on her than a doorknob" - The Bodydonnas on Sunny.

    "Now, speaking of sore-losers, how fitting is it that we are in the capital city of sore-losers, Buffalo, New York! Now, I'm talking, Superbowls, Stanley Cup Finals, O.J.! It 'so' doesn't get more depressing than right here." - Christian.

    "Kick him when he's down, he's easier to reach." - Scott Hall

    "This crowd is letting Kurt know that he sucks. Just in case he had forgotten." - Jim Ross

    "I don't have 30 days and 30 nights, to show you why all the hoochies say there's nothing finer than Scott Steiner, but all I need is one night to have your wife call me for the rest of her life, the big bad booty daddy, so this goes to all my freaks out there, Big Poppa Pump is your hook up, hollar if you hear me." - Scott Steiner

    "Why put off kicking somebody's *ss next week when I can do it right now." - The Undertaker

    "It doesn't make you bad losing to Rob Van Dam... it just makes you like everybody else." -- Rob Van Dam

    "This leg will be known as Christmas, and this leg will be known as New Year's! So ladies, why don't you all come visit the Big Valbowski between the holidays?" - Val Venis

    "Win if you can, lose if you must, but ALWAYS cheat!" - Jesse Ventura

    Jerry Lawler

    "Is that Paul Bearer's face or did his butt grow a nose?" - Jerry Lawler on Paul Bearer

    "[Sunny] didn't make a fool out of Phineas -- God beat her to that." - Jerry Lawler

    "Do you know what Tori said the first time she saw Kane naked? 'Well I guess this makes me the early bird'..." Jerry 'The King' Lawler

    "You know, Alundra Blayze, with her looks could star in a T.V. western--if she had two more legs!" - Jerry Lawler (God, I miss this Lawler)

    "You never really know a woman till you meet her in court." - Jerry Lawler

    "Helen Hart is so old, she remembers when the Dead Sea was sick." - Jerry Lawler.

    "The only reason Jake 'The Snake' Roberts doesn't drink and drive anymore is because he is afraid he might hit a bump and spill his drink." - Jerry Lawler.

    "Helen Hart once got her tongue stuck in the toaster trying to make french toast." - Jerry Lawler

    "Helen Hart is so old, she's the only person i know who has an autographed copy of the Bible"... Jerry Lawler

    Quote Originally Posted by akbar View Post
    I'd rather masturbate to your picture of Carnage.

    Quote Originally Posted by B-MCINTYRE View Post
    DRG hates everyone

  6. #16
    Bobby Heenan Quotes

    "You don't have to yell at me, Schiavone. I'm not blind!" - Bobby Heenan

    Heenan: " That's either the flock or the who's who of skid row."
    Schiavone: " Maybe both."

    "Do you think this brain thing is a gimmick?" - Bobby Heenan

    "If you ever had your moon salted you'd know how painful that could be." - Bobby Heenan

    (after Juventud Guerrera took off his mask)
    "Now when he delivers pizza, everyone will know who he is." - Bobby Heenan

    "You know what slows down Typhoon? Twinkies--Hostess Cupcakes." - Bobby Heenan

    (When Bob Backlund is entering the arena)
    "At 234 pounds, from Mayberry, Opie Taylor." - Bobby Heenan

    "North Dakota State. What do you have to do there to graduate? Milk a cow with your left hand? - Bobby Heenan

    Jim Ross: "Hey everybody can't be born with a silver spoon in their mouth and have a chauffeur named Jennifer, who told me she hasn't had a raise in several months."
    Bobby Heenan: "She said that?"
    Ross: "Yes"
    Heenan: "She's fired. I'll unload her like I found her. Do you need a job on the weekends?"
    Ross: "I'm a little busy on the weekend"
    Heenan: "Oh that's right, you just drive pickup trucks."

    "Stu Hart trained all his kids--only three of them use the litter box." - Bobby Heenan

    (Talking about the Guerrero family)
    "Their family is watching this at home wondering if the wheels are going to get stolen off their house. - Bobby Heenan

    (Talking about Chavo Guerrero)
    "He's the only guy I know that has a stable of stick horses." - Bobby Heenan

    Tony Schiavone
    : "Scott Hall is looking a little better this week."
    Bobby Heenan: "It's only Monday."

    "There's another way to look at this: there are 153 Villanos wrestling." - Bobby Heenan

    Bobby Heenan:
    "Some nights the Villanos sit around the fire with popcorn and their masks on."
    Tony Schiavone: "I hate you!"

    (Talking about Koko B. Ware)
    "The job is only half done. If they want to shrink his head, they already shrunk his haircut."

    (Talking about Yokozuna on the day before Thanksgiving)
    "505 pounds and maybe more after tomorrow."

    "There is good news and bad news about Rey's shirt, The bad news is the shirt don't fit him, the good news is all the luchadores are moving in" - Bobby Heenan

    Bobby Heenan:
    "That's not the first time he's been on the ground holding his stomach."
    Tony Schiavone: "Huh?"
    Bobby Heenan: "Obviously you've never had any of Mrs. Gurrero's chili."

    "That shirt: It's like sinus infection green." - Bobby Heenan

    (Talking about Ralphus's dress)
    "Obviously some cheap motel is missing a shower curtain." - Bobby Heenan

    Bobby Heenan
    : "And don't forget Mickey Jay. He's a second generation, too."
    Tony Schiavone: "Who's his father?"
    Bobby Heenan: "He's not a wrestling referee. He ref'ed a pee-wee football league back in the '40's."

    (After Rey Mysterio, Jr. unmasks)
    "It's Leave it to Beaver!"

    (Talking about Mikey Whipwreck)
    "Do you think that when Mikey was a kid, was he his parents' little whipper-snapper?"

    Bobby Heenan
    : "I figured out who the Patriot is."
    Tony Schiavone: "Who?"
    BH: "Where is he from?"
    TS: "Washington, DC."
    BH: "It's Al Gore."

    Mike Tenay
    : "He's got Roman numerals on his trunks."
    Bobby Heenan: "His numerals shouldn't be roamin'."

    Mike Tenay
    : "What took us so long to come to Chapel Hill?"
    Bobby Heenan: "We couldn't find it."

    "What good is shaking your hands? If you want to shake something, put your hands together and wrap them around your opponent's head." - Bobby Heenan

    "I remembered when Tony came to WCW. He took the mask off and his career skyrocketed." - Bobby Heenan

    Mike Tenay
    : "Just who is the leader of the nWo?"
    Bobby Heenan: "I'm not sure, but I wouldn't be surprised if Tony Danza comes out."

    (During a hardcore match)
    "These two move more furniture than Mayflower." - Bobby Heenan

    Tony Schiavone
    : "Don't try this in your backyard."
    Bobby Heenan: "Do it in your living room, it is much more fun. Or maybe in Tony's living room, he'll never know."

    "Just the other day I was talking to Cal Ripken, Jr. and he asked me 'Do they pay Tony?' " - Bobby Heenan

    "And for those of you that dropped out of high school, remember the famous phrase: 'Do you want fries with that?' " - Bobby Heenan

    "I don't have el zippo, I don't even smoke or have a lighter!" - Bobby Heenan

    (Talking about Hulk Hogan and pyrotechnics)
    "At least he doesn't have to worry about his hair catching on fire." - Bobby Heenan

    Jim Ross:
    "Tremendous ovation for Hacksaw Jim Duggan."
    Bobby Heenan: "I don't know why!"

    Tony Schiavone
    : "I never even knew Evan Karagias was here."
    Bobby Heenan: "I never know where he is and don't care."

    "Is everyone from Texas nuts, or are we just lucky to see the ones we do?" - Bobby Heenan

    Tony Schiavone
    : "Pardon me."
    Bobby Heenan: "I'm not the governor."

    Gorilla Monsoon
    : "The Texas Tornado could sustain permanent brain damage if it's kept on for much longer."
    Bobby Heenan: "Then again it could increase his IQ by 9 points. That would make an even 10."

    Tony Schiavone
    : "That's one of the things that makes this sport great."
    Bobby Heenan: "No I'm one of the things that makes this sport great!"

    Quote Originally Posted by akbar View Post
    I'd rather masturbate to your picture of Carnage.

    Quote Originally Posted by B-MCINTYRE View Post
    DRG hates everyone

  7. #17
    Bobby Heenan Quotes cont.

    Bobby Heenan commenting on Hogan's entrance music:
    Heenan: That's my second favorite song.
    Monsoon: I'm almost afraid to ask. What's your favorite?
    Heenan: All the rest are tied.

    Bobby Heenan on some Jobber: "I once asked him what came at the end of the sentence... and he said "parole"."

    "He looks like something that fell out of a deck of cards!" -- Bobby Heenan on Oliver Humperdink

    Bobby Heenan on the Ultimate Warrior: "This guy makes coffee nervous."

    Gorilla & Bobby on the Rosatti sisters:
    Brain: "I looked it up. You know what Rosatti means in Italian?"
    Gorilla: "Sure. It means red, rich, full..."
    Brian: means lard.

    Bobby Heenan on Jobber Rikki Atakki: "Once you wrestle Rikki Atakki, an hour later you want to wrestle him again."

    "You know why there were only 220 Mexicans at the Alamo? They only had one car."

    "Do you know Koko B. Ware's mom's first name? Tupper."

    "Tito Santana is like a cue-ball. The more you strike him, the more english you get out of him." -- Bobby Heenan

    Bobby Heenan on Kerry Von Erich: "He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs."

    Bobby H & Gorilla on Chico Santana:
    Bobby H: Did you know Tito holds a place in Guiness' Book of World Records?
    Gorilla: Yeah? For what?
    Bobby H: He picked 1,600 heads of lettuce in 1/2 an hour.
    Gorilla: Will you stop...

    (Gorilla is talking about the last match, and Bobby is on the banana phone with someone, trying to get advance tickets to Wrestlemania VII, and one listens carefully and hears, in rapid succession):
    "That's right, tickets are going on sale"
    "Well don't get smart with me, I'll slap you in the mouth"
    "Do you want me to knock ya down?"
    (and as they pan off to an ad,)
    "I'll talk to you later mom"

    Heenan: I KNOW who the Assassin is!!!!
    Schiavone: Tell us, Bobby, who?
    Heenan: He's the guy down at ringside wearing the mask!

    "A friend in need is a pest."

    (I have an old newspaper column written about Heenan when he was managing the Valients in the AWA during the 1970s. His final comment to the interviewer was):
    "The two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they're allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce."

    Gorilla: "That was an illegal move!"
    Brain: "No it wasn't."
    Gorilla: "Yes it was!"
    Brain: "No, it was a legal move, it was a Greco-Roman Hair Pull."

    (Bobby on Hillbilly Jim)
    Brain: "Now THAT'S no way to introduce a man like Hilbilly Jim!!"
    Monsoon: "Well, how would YOU do it, Brain??"
    Brain: "Ladies and Gentlemen... the HICK FROM MUD LICK, HILLBILLY JIM!!!"

    (Bobby on Kerry Von Erich and his Tornado Punch)
    Brain: "Oh my, what a GREAT scientific move! A punch to the head!!"

    (KoKo-B-Ware enters the ring with this wild new hairdo; stripes running front to back dyed in parrakeet colors)
    Brain: "Do you know what KoKo calls his new hair style?"
    Gorilla: (With a groan) "No. What?"
    Brain: "Afroturf."

    (At Havoc 94 Flair walks by Bischoff and Brain was holding up 4 fingers. Hogan walks by after Flair has entered the cage.)
    Bischoff: "When Flair walked by he held up 4 fingers. That was the sign of the 4 Horsemen"
    Brain: "When Hogan walked by I held up one finger"

    Wrestlemania IV:
    Brain To Bob Ueker: "You recieved 7,000 votes to get into the Hall Of Fame. You'd have gotten a
    lot more, but you ran out of stamps."

    Refering to Sherri
    Brain: That's my pin-up girl
    Gorilla: I think you should see your occulist
    Brain: There's nothing wrong with my feet

    During Undertaker match
    Brain: C'mon ref. 1,2,3,4,5
    Gorilla: What are you doing?
    Brain: I'm showing ya. The referee could've broke the hold. He's intimidated by that monster.
    Gorilla: Why don't you go down there and referee?
    Brain: I'm needed here.

    Refering to locations recieving WMVIII
    Brain: 30 countries?
    Gorilla: Yes indeed
    Brain: Spell em

    Gorilla: I don't know who's the legal guy in the ring
    Brain: Danny Davis, the referee

    Ross: Back in Oklahoma, Bobby, we called a match like this a slobberknocker
    Bobby: I thought that's what they called the waitress at the Tip Top cafe in Downtown Tulsa.

    "Thank goodness for next year, huh Ross. Indoor plumbing comes to Oklahoma."

    (Regarding Davey Boy Smith): "Million dollar body, ten cent mind and Whoopi Goldberg's hairdo"

    Bobby: Right here in Jim Louis Arena.
    Gorilla: Joe Louis!
    Bobby: Joe Louis, sorry.
    Gorilla: Who's Jim Louis?
    Bobby: Who's Joe Louis?

    Brain: That's the good part of town...notice there were only 38 cars up on blocks.

    Schiavone: Well, Duggan is at a disadvantage in this type of match
    Brain: He is at a disadvantage when he wakes up.

    Brain: Do you realize if an Avalanche hit this town, they could apply for Federal Aid and get 18 or 22 bucks?!?!

    Brain: That's a shame for Sting, cause if you go to the hospital in this town with a bad leg, they shoot you.

    Schiavione: This is a great town.
    Brain: They should tear it down and build a slum

    (To Piper)
    "I heard a rumour that your mom and dad ran away from home."

    (In reference to Stu and Helen Hart in attendance)
    "You know why they're nervous? They snuck in. They're looking out for the usher."

    (During IC title match)
    Brain: Don't touch that referee Perfect!
    Gorilla: Why? A disqualification will save his title.
    Brain: O.K. Then nail him!

    Ross: Virgil is unconscious.
    Bobby: When Virgil's unconscious he's usually on his feet talking to you.

    When the heel cheats: "What happened there? My monitor went out."

    "You should never hit him (JYD) in the head. It's amazing how Mother Nature protects the weakest part of the body with the strongest."

    In reference to Hillbilly Jim - "For crying out loud, McMahon, you're talking to a guy who thinks the bathroom should be outside 50 feet in back of the house!"

    (During Von Erich/Warlord match)
    Brain: Warlord's a lot bigger.
    Gorilla: Tornado's a lot quicker, Brain.
    Brain: Warlord's a lot stronger.
    Gorilla: Tornado's a lot smarter, Brain.
    Brain: Now you've lied to the people.

    "That was Tornado's forte in college. He was a javelin catcher."

    Brain: You know, I could make a lot of money with Typhoon.
    Ross: How would you do that?
    Brain: Well, I wouldn't have him wrestle. I'd take him to shopping centres and let kids ride him for a couple of bucks.

    Quote Originally Posted by akbar View Post
    I'd rather masturbate to your picture of Carnage.

    Quote Originally Posted by B-MCINTYRE View Post
    DRG hates everyone

  8. #18
    Bobby Heenan Quotes cont.

    "It's very easy to beat the 1-2-3 Kid. You put a glass of milk down and a couple of oreo cookies. When he goes for 'em, put the boots to him."

    "Wouldn't you say that 20 members of the Hart family living together is classified as a ghetto"

    "I know all about cheating. I've had six very successful marriages."

    "With Duggan, taking a shower is a high risk maneuver."

    "Giving the Nasty Boys the Tag Team of the year award is like giving the Cindy Crawford beauty award to Roseanne Barr."

    Brain: You know what they call a woman with 2 million dollars?
    Schivone: What?
    Brain: Divorce.

    "The money's the same, whether you earn it or scam it."

    Tony: I think the fans are pretty much divided as to who their favorite is.
    Brain: Yes. One half loves Flair, the other half hates Steamboat.

    (After Cactus Jack crashes into ringside railing)
    "You'd better get somebody down here. That rail could be damaged."

    "Do you know what 'Ariba' means. It means 'Swim faster, the boarder guards are behind us".

    (Refering to the Steiner Brothers)
    "Three toughest years of their life...the eighth grade"

    Vince: All Typhoon has to do is sit up and tag his partner.
    Heenan: You're asking a lot for Typhoon to do a sit-up.

    (On Junkyard Dog)
    "His parents had nine months and the best they could come up with is Junkyard?!"

    "He's (Martel) ahead on points. It's 138000 to 4, as far as I'm concerned."

    (From Nitro)
    Bischoff to McMichaels: Did you ever play (football) while unconscious
    Brain: His whole career!

    Gorilla: (Bushwhackers schoolboy Lombardi & Horowitz) "That's Communication!"
    Heenan: How could you communicate when you have the I.Q. of a doorknob?

    "The prom queen last year was named Bubba"

    Brain: Duggan's an idiot.
    Tony: Duggan's an idiot?!?
    Brain: So, you agree with me.

    Here's one he said on WCWSN last year when a jobber was thrown outside the ring by Jean-Paul Leveque: "Hey, when you hit the floor, keep it down. I'm talking."

    Bobby: "Excuse me one minute. (yelling) Hey Stu (Hart), wake up! He fell asleep."
    Vince: "He's gonna wake up. He's gonna come over here, Bobby."
    Bobby: "That'll take two hours. We'll be off the air."

    On an episode of Wrestling Challenge:
    BH: Gorilla, what's with you naming all the body parts?
    GM: I happen to have a knowledge about it. Why don't you try it?
    (Heenan does. Skinner kicks a jobber in the stomach.)
    BH: There's a kick to the uterus.

    On Nitro when Benoit powerbombed Guererro:
    McMichaels: That'll change the color of your hair.
    Brain: That'll change the color of your shorts.

    "Last year Luna won miss Ontario. Nobody usually wins that"

    Savage: Is she (Luna) from Oklahoma?
    Heenan: No, she's pretty.

    Savage: And where would Rick Steiner be?
    Heenan: Probably on Page 3 of a comic book. He'll be there for a while.

    "The last time I saw Typhoon move like that is when one of those humanoids opened a package of Little Debbie's snack cakes"

    Ross: I used to wear bib overalls back in grade school.
    Brain: Toughest 18 years of your life, huh?

    (During a Nasty Boys match)
    Schiavone: "A drop toehold by one of the Nasty Boys, believe it or not."
    Heenan: "That was an accident, believe me."

    (On Pillman's career with the Bengals)
    "They would have won, if they traded him."

    (After Dave charged Bubba in the corner and got kicked in the mouth)
    "Good, Dave! You hit him with your mouth on the bottom of his foot!"

    Vince: "There are three Canadians left in the battle Royale, with the Quebecers and Rick Martel."
    Heenan: "And Adam Bomb's from Three-Mile Island. That's like Canada."

    (During a Pillman/Benoit v. Armstrongs match on Worldwide the Brain had really cracked up Schiavone to the point where Schiavone missed a couple of moves because he was giggling)
    Schiavone: "Folks, I apologize for laughing at this man... "
    Heenan: "Why? Everybody laughs at Scott Armstrong!"

    "There's nothing better than a good, blind referee."

    (Talking about Koko B Ware)
    "He gives up a little bit of height to Webster"

    Alfred Hayes: "Thank you so much Bobby for that kind introduction."
    Brain: "It was written down. I didn't come up with it."

    Schivone: "I wouldn't let you do my taxes, either."
    Brain: "I don't do my own, either. I have my friend do mine."
    Schivone: "Oh really. Who's your friend?"
    Brain: "Never mind. He won't be out for another 6 months."

    (Talking about Jerry Lawler as he enters the '93 Rumble)
    Brain: "You know, Jerry Lawler is the host of WWF Superstars."
    Gorilla: "I thought Vince McMahon was the host of Superstars."
    Brain: "No, he gets him coffee, and shines his shoes."

    Brain: "The bad thing about the Bushwhackers is that win, lose, or draw, you gotta have everything you got on fumigated."

    Ross: "I didn't see any tag there!"
    Savage: "There wasn't one."
    Brain: "You have sunglasses and a hat over your eyes."
    Ross: "I don't have any sunglasses on, and I didn't see it."
    Brain: "Yeah, but you're from Oklahoma."

    Gorilla: "This place is going crazy! Look at the Hulkster pointing to all of his hulkamaniacs!
    Heenan: "He's not pointing to anybody, he's showing off how high he can count!"

    (Dustin roads is standing on top of the turnbuckle pounding someone. Dustin starts punching, the crowd starts counting the punches)
    Brain: "I've never been so surprised in my life."
    Tony: "You're surprised that Dustin is dominating this match?"
    Brain: "No, I'm surprised that the humanoids can count to 10... "

    (Schiavone was listing all the people Heenan had lied to)
    Schiavone: "You lie to Steve McMichael, on Nitro live every Monday Night."
    Heenan: "Yeah, but that's different, his best friend is a dog so that's okay."

    "You know, you can bang the Nasty Boys' heads into the turnbuckles all you want, it doesn't matter, it just makes the turnbuckles stickier."

    Brain: "There is nothing quite like a good blind referee, except for a rich mother-in-law who likes to go bungee-jumping with a chainsaw."

    Heenan: "What's the first letter in the word 'and?'"
    Tony: "'A.'"
    Heenan: "No, you didn't hear me. What's the first letter in the word 'and?'"
    Tony: "'A!'"
    Heenan: "Forget it. You must be Canadian."

    (During the Shawn Michaels/Marty Jannetty Intercontinental Title match at Royal Rumble 93, Michaels threw Jannetty out of the ring)
    Brain: "Shawn, you gotta piledrive him on the steps, break his neck and his shoulders."
    Monsoon: "Will you stop!"
    Brain: "It's a good amatuer move!"

    (From same match as above)
    Tony: "It's a no win situation arguing with you."
    Brain: "You can win, it'll just cost you some money."

    "If a guy sticks his hand out to you, shake it..and then kick him real hard when he's not looking."

    Brain: "If you can't comment on the match right, then leave."
    Monsoon: "I'm outta here."
    Brain: "Don't go yet, I gotta ask you another question."

    (Eric Bischoff, about the Nasty Boys talking with Hulk Hogan regarding their joining the New World Order)
    Bischoff: "Let me tell you something guys... Nasty Boys... if you believe that, then you're dumber than you look."
    Brain: "They couldn't be that dumb!"

    (On Bret Hart giving his sunglasses out)
    "There he is, buying fans again."

    (Refering to Hacksaw Duggan)
    Heenan: "... and that man. Back in the ring after that operation."
    Schiavone & Dusty Rhodes (in unison): "What operation?"
    Heenan: "He's a brain donor."

    (On the Armstrongs)
    Brain: "Oh, the Armstrongs won't win this one, they're quitters!"
    Schiavone: "That's not true, do you make this stuff up?"
    Brain: "No, Bob Armstrong himself told me that!"

    (During a Oct 1996 WCW Worldwide. Shavionne is talking about managing and how Heenan needed talented wrestlers to succeed at managing)
    Schiavone: "So brain, your saying you managed all your wrestlers to the top by yourself, whether they were talented or not?"
    Brain: "Oh, I see you read my book!"

    (This was from the mid 80's and Tito Santana's tag team partner is getting beaten up in the ring)
    Monsoon: "I can't believe that Tito Santana hasn't come out here to help his partner."
    Brain: "He can't come out here, immigration is sitting in the front row!"

    (On an episode of Prime Time Wrestling. Heenan and Monsoon are in the Old West)
    Chinese Laundry Guy: "Ah, ah-so ah-so."
    Brain: "What did you call me?!"

    Brain: "YOU'RE (Bischoff) better looking than Jack Nicklaus!"
    Bischoff: "So are you, Bobby!"
    Brain: "Oh, I knew that!"

    Bischoff: "Our good buddy, Kevin Greene, got two sacks yesterday, if I read USA Today right."
    Heenan: "Yeah, at the 7-11. One was full of beer, the other nuts."
    Bischoff: "No, no... got them against the Minnesota Vikings."
    Heenan (laughs): "Who couldn't?"

    (During a squash match. Rough & Ready against Prince Iaukea and a NBSJ: Never Before Seen Jobber)
    Brain: "What is he the prince of?"
    Schiavone: "I suppose one of the South Pacific islands... maybe Fiji, maybe Tonga."
    Heenan: "Maybe Newark."

    "What the #### are you doing?"
    -- Bobby "The Brain" Heenan to Brian Pillman during a live WCW Clash of the Champions broadcast, January 1996

    Quote Originally Posted by akbar View Post
    I'd rather masturbate to your picture of Carnage.

    Quote Originally Posted by B-MCINTYRE View Post
    DRG hates everyone

  9. #19
    no more Heenan quotes! My head hurts from laughing!

  10. #20
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Saskatchewan, CAN
    Blog Entries
    "It takes a great Bad Guy, to make a great Good Guy." - Mick Foley

    "If you don't want to get critisized, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing." - Mick Foley


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