Bob Daniels: Welcome Ladies and Gentlemen to another episode of the longest running EWN wrestling show, Inferno! We're coming to you live all the way from Salt Lake City, Utah! We are now just three days away from Glory To The Brave and it's shaping up to be a huge show. I'm Bob Daniels and with me as always, Pierce Kingmaker.
Pierce Kingmaker: Thanks Bob! It's great to be here once again, i'm getting excited because this Sunday is going to be phenomenal. We've got Tommy Thunder facing Gillz for the EWNCW Championship, King Strem taking on Mark Dimension for the International title and many more matches to be revealed tonight on Inferno!
BD: That's right Pierce, we've got a number one contenders match for the Inferno Ignition Title between Johnny Rose and Sweet Jones. We'll also be seeing Krysys take on Bam and The Jaws of Men face Freak Inc, this show is gonna be packed.
PK: And no doubt we'll hear from Gillz and Tommy Thunder once more Bob. Gillz has got to be fuming about what happened last week, both men have been trying to goad the other into breaking the no contact clause, and it all nearly boiled over last week.
BD: Speaking of Gillz here comes the champ now, and boy does he look unhappy.
PK: I would be too after what happened last week, Tommy Thunder not only cost him a match last week, but also had the nerve to wear the belt around Gillz' waist.
BD: It was a bold statement of intent from Thunder who by all descriptions has been a thorn in Gillz side for some weeks now.
PK: It works both ways of course because Gillz has done everything in his power to make sure Tommy hasn't had it easy either.
*Gillz enters and walks to ring with an obvoius annoyance at last week*
Gillz: Tommy!!! You think you can bait me into hitting you? Do you honestly believe i am that stupid, infact i think you do believe that i wouldnt put it passed a guy like you.
But it doesnt matter, im the calmest man on the planet when i need to be like last week so theres nothing you can do to make me hit, nothing at all.
Sure you coming down to the ring and practically stealing what is mine would make me pissed, but it doesnt matter. I may not be able to make you pay for wearing MY BELT!! But there is one man who can and should punish you for that.
I think we all know who it is, but for the braindead in the audience, so for the audiences sake Staples! Get your scrawney ass down to my ring and tell what the hell you are going to do with Tomy for what he tried to last week
*There is nothing for a while*
Gillz: Staples! im not asking you to do it, im demanding you get down here, comon little man come here and tell me to my face what Tommy will get for trying to steal what is rightfully mine.
*Gillz puts the mic up to his mouth*
BD: Ask and you shall receive, here comes the Baws!
PK: I don't think he was asking, that was more of a demand, Gillz is furious!
*Nathan Staples appears and walks down the ramp to a good pop from the crowd, he has his own mic in his hand and steps through the ropes.*
Staples: Now you listen to me, Champ. I'm not too happy with your tone, I think you forget sometimes who signs your pay cheques.
*The crowd cheers as Staples stands up for himself*
Staples: First of all, the next time you come out here and make demands from me, you better remember that I can do whatever the hell I want. I could put you in a match against 6 men if I feel like it, so you better calm yourself down!
*Another big pop for Staples.*
Staples: Secondly, you got a taste of your own medicine last week as far as i'm concerned! Two weeks ago you interfered in Tommy's match and turn about is fair play! So as far as what i'm going to do to Tommy? Absolutely nothing!
*The crowd cheer again as Gillz gets visibly annoyed.*
Staples: Now thirdly..
BD: King Strem!? What's he doing out here!?
PK: All this talk about Tommy must have reminded him that Tommy managed to beat him last week.
BD: If I remember, Strem wasn't happy that Staples put Tommy in a match against him.
PK: And rightly so, Tommy didn't need to get involved with Strem, he had nothing to do with his disagreements with Billy McCoy.
*Strem storms down to the ring, clearly unhappy as well, he takes the mic from Gillz and turns his attention to the GM.*
Strem: So Nate, it seems like Gillz and I agree upon something. Yes, we both have a problem with Tommy, but that is not the point. We both think you are an inbreed that is incapable of doing a simple task of keeping things fair and just and simple here.
*The crowd boos Strem*
Strem: You cannot doing any of these three things Nate, and something has to change. Either you need to put a sack on yourself and start doing your god damn job, or I will start a completely chaotic riot here. I will burn this place to the ground, I will start an unholy war of hell here. I am ready to bring this foundation down if I am not going to get what I want.
*Strem Sucks! Strem Sucks!*
Strem: Granted I got a small piece of "I Want Cake" when Billy lost and did not get into the title match at Glory to the Brave. Billy is just a annoying itch that needs scratched. I cannot stand him or his new little buddy Tommy. Tommy, you have no reason to be a bodyguard for anyone. You keep your noise in your business, I'll keep my nose in mine. As for this sunday, well it is the same song I have been singing. I will destroy the person that is Mark Dimension and take the title. And like I said, if all is not Fair and Just, expect an anarchy in EWNCW, led by The King. I have spoken...
*Staples looks at Strem, and then to Gillz and back to Strem.*
Staples: Alright listen up, because I just had a great idea. Seeing as the two of you are best friends forever all of a sudden.
*Laughter from the crowd*
Staples: I'm going to put you both into a tag team match, in tonights main event! And as for your opponents, well, you can wait and find out because i'm not gonna tell ya! Now both of ya get the hell out of my ring because we've got a match coming up.
*Staples drops his mic and exits the ring leaving Gillz and Strem angry, shouting after him. The crowd cheer and Staples waves to the crowd as he walks away.*
BD: Wow! So we're gonna have Gillz and Strem team up to face a mystery team later on tonight!
PK: And they aren't happy about that one bit, they both really wanted Tommy punished for his actions last week, and well, Nathan wasn't in the mood.
BD: Staples was right on the money, Gillz and Strem both got what was coming last week. Coming up in a few moments we've got Alex Kidd vs Mike Hawk, don't go anywhere!
Jason: From Sonora, Mexico, it is ALEX KIDD!
BD: Alex Kidd is back! And he looks ready to get back down to business after last week.
PK: Kidd stuck his nose into Arthur Lansdales business, what did he do to deserve that?
BD: How about attacking an opponent once the match had ended, it was uncalled for and Kidd stood up for Dutchman.
*Kidd walks to the ring with a mic, ready for action.*
Kidd: Last week I came out here and help Dutchman, for two reasons. The man needed it, and I wanted to announce my aspirations for the Ignition title! Nothing is going to stop me from climbing that mountain and reigning as champion! But first, I know i have to earn that shot, and earn it I will. I will beat whomever the brass places in front of me until I get that title shot! I may have lost at the JBW/EWNCW Cross Promotion PPV, but I am still the best high-flyer EWNCW has ever seen and holding the Ignition title is going to prove that without a shadow of a doubt. I promise you all, I shall fly the highest and take tha title to new heights!
BD: I like his ideals, and the way he prizes the title!
PK: Me too, but I don't think he can take the title, honestly! The champ is one mean fighting machine, and it'll take some serious power to break through him and take what he earned!
BD: We'll see, Kingmaker, we'll see!
Jason: From Toyko, Japan; It's Mr. MAYHEM. MIKE HAWK!!!!!!!!
PK: What's this? Mike Hawk?
BD: Looks like it, two Ignition division stars are about to clash it seems.
Hawk: Look, Alex, I commend you for stepping up and helping the Flying Dutchman guy, but let's face it, you aren't the only one with Ignition title aspirations, my friend. I, too, am in the hunt for the title and it seems you are just going to be a stepping stone for me to get there. Understand? But don't take it too personally, it's all business over this way. Besides, I don't think you deserve the title shot over me, I haven't seen you doing much over the past couple weeks, maybe I've been falling asleep a bit and missing your matches and such, but hey, if that's the way the cookie crumbles man.
BD: Looks like we're going to have ourselves a good old fashioned match!
PK: I wonder who is going to come out on top!
Hawk(Yoshi) vs Alex(Kidd)
*As Hawk walks from ringside, Lansdale blindsides Kidd, attacking him brutally. Kicks and punches, whips into the steel guardrails, the works. A systematic dissection of Alex Kidd occurs before the very eyes of the EWNCW crowd. As Lansdale stands over Alex Kidd, he looks off into the crowd, then walks off*
BD: What the hell is going on here! Why is Lansdale out here attacking Alex Kidd after this match?
PK: Revenge i'm betting! Kidd is getting what he deserved after interupting one of Lansdales lessons last week!
*Inferno returns to a backstage scene with Surgeon General and Captain Howdy talking*
Surgeon General: What the hell is wrong with you Howdy? What were you doing out there? First you LEAVE me on Inferno then YOU lose our match on BWA! And don't even get me started on that name.
Captain Howdy: What the hell are you talking about?
SG: You know damn well what I mean! I don't ever wanna hear you say those words again!
CH: You need to chill ya happy ass out freak!
SG: You're right, you're right I will chill out. Because, I've got a solution to our little problem right here. (Shows Howdy a huge syringe full of meds) A little extra dose of the Sickness for you my friend!
CH: Back up man! I said BACK UP! (Surgeon General continues advancing) I'm warning you!
SG: Warning me? YOU'RE warning ME??? I have exclusive orders from Solla to set you straight. You're not you Howdy!
CH: You're right, I'm not Captain Howdy. I'm me!
(SG makes a final lunge but is met with a violent series of punches & a Cradle Shock. Captain Howdy grabs the camera & looks into it intensely.)
CH: Listen to me, look in my eyes people! I'm not Captain Howdy! Never was, never will be. You see that sack of trash I just pummeled? (Points the camera at Surgeon General) Because of him & that fatass hippo Solla the real me was held back for too long! THEY did this to me! I'm not some freak! (Begins ripping out the piercings from all over his face & cuts his long hair off with scissors he took from his pocket.) I'm Andy Cannon!
*Back at the announce table*
PK: What? Cannon! Could that be what he was referring too? Andy Cannon! Is this an evolution of Captain Howdy?!
BD: Sounds more like a regression, but it seems like he needs the medicine! Look at what he's doing, he is clearly off his damn rocker! I hope SG is okay, because that was uncalled for. That man kept him sane!
PK: He was DRUGGING him, that is in no way okay! At least this didn't play out like in that other fed, where the chick knew she was being drugged, stopped, and continued hanging out with the chick!
BD: I'm still not sure what we've just witnessed. Have The Collective split? What's going on?
PK: Looks like those meds have worn off.. Andy Cannon, as he now calls himself, seems to have been cured of the sickness.
Jason: From LAS VEGAS, NEVADA!! It's KRYSYS!
BD: Here comes Krysys, hot from his victory last week in the main event over Bam and Gillz.
PK: Winning that match will have given him real confidence going into this match against Bam, he may be in line for a title shot real soon.
*Krysys walks out to cheers from the crowd, he is smiling from ear to ear as he walks down the ramp, he stops by some kids and high fives them and poses for doing the X before getting in the ring reaching for a mic*
*Crowd chants for Krysys*
KK: Whoa! Calm down folks! The Saint is here! Last week I beat the Japanese Douche Bam, and our very own Champ, Gillz in a Triple Threat Match, so by that win, shouldn't I be getting a title match?
*Crowd roars and yells YES*
KK: See, that's what I thought, but apparently that old nut Flair, went backstage and started ranting and raving and blading, screaming that Bam deserves a rematch against me, they said no so he bladed some more, until finally they agreed to it. So that mean Bam gets to step in the ring with me again and get another ass kicking, and when it's over he can bitch to Father Time for putting him in a match he never could have won!
KK: Gillz, Tommy, I want you to watch because no matter who wins at Glory To The Brave, they will face me next! Boy and Girls, you are looking at your future EWNCW Straight Edge Champion! That I Promise!
BD: Pierce, have you noticed over the last couple of weeks how Bam has been getting a lot of aggravation from Flair over his 'supposed' mistakes?
PK: I have actually Bob, these two don't seem to be getting along as well as they used to do, probably became Bam hasn't been winning enough matches.
BD: Surely that's mostly Flairs fault though, I mean he gets involved all the time and has cost Bam two weeks in a row now. Hitting him with the EWNCW title belt two weeks ago, and last week causing a distraction outside the ring enabling Krysys to pin Bam.
PK: Ahh hey now that's not Flairs fault, he's just trying to help out wherever he can. Bam should be grateful for it.
*Flair and Bam head out from the back, Flair doesn't look too happy and is already red in the face from shouting at Bam. The pair walk down to the ring to a sea of boos and Flair grabs a mic, takes his jacket off and throws it onto the mat.*
Flair: Shut your mouths! Shut em right now! I'm a wrestling GOD and you shut your mouths when God is talking to you!
*Flair runs the ropes and elbow drops his own jacket, much to the bemusement of the fans and Krysys.*
Flair: Krysys! You little punk! You think you got one over on Bam last week!? Well not today you little moron! Today we set the record straight! You got lucky, and luck gets you nowhere in this business! You think you're the man!? You're not the man, I'm the Man! Me, Ric Flair, The Nature Boy! The wrestling God!
*The crowd boo Naitch some more as Bam stands in the corner, visibly getting tired of hearing Flair go on and on, time and time again.*
Flair: Tonight Krysys! Bam is gonna take you out! That's right boy! He's gonna break you in half! And I mean it! And Bam.. Bam if you don't get the job done tonight, there won't be no excuses boy! I'll whoop you myself and show you how a real man gets it done! Just like I showed your momma last night! WOOOOOOOOO!
*Bam gets angry and stares down Flair, Flair stares back at him, getting redder and angrier himself. Krysys hangs back to see what happens but Bam just shakes his head and Flair yells more orders at him.*
BD: Geez, Flair is gonna push Bam too far one of these days.. Bam looks about ready to throw him outta the building..
PK: I see what ya mean! Look at that vein on his forehead, it's ready to burst! Bam's I mean.. not Flair.. we know he's got a history of bla..
BD: Bleeding, Pierce.
Bam vs Krysys
(Ignore match ending, Flair hands Bam a chair with the ref down and allows him to get the win.)
BD: Bam steals one! Thanks to Flair's interference!
PK: Krysys won't be happy at all with that!
*Flair enters the ring and goes to celebrate with Bam, but Bam swivels, turns around and slams the chair into Flairs face!*
BD: What the hell!? Bam just took out Flair!
PK: Are you kidding me!!? Why did he do that?
*Bam stands over both men and poses victoriously as the crowd boos*
BD: Bam must have had enough of being told what to do!
BD: If you're just joining us you've missed a great night so far. Tonight seems like a good night for betrayal because already we've seen Andy Cannon, AKA Captain Howdy take out his own partner Surgeon General.
PK: Not only that, but Bam just destroyed Ric Flair! I guess the man from Osaka had taken too much abuse from him and finally snapped.
BD: But not only that, Bam and Krysys will be having a rematch at Glory to the Brave due to the way the match ended. Nathan Staples was out during the commercial break to let us know.
PK: A rematch? I think we can bet safely that Flair won't be getting involved in that one, Bam's made sure of that.
BD: Well right now i'm hearing Jonathan Sanchez is backstage and he's with Johnny Rose ahead of his match with Sweet Jones later tonight.
*The camera switches to Sanchez*
Jonathan Sanchez: Thanks Bob, i'm here with none other than EWNCW newcomer Johnny Rose. Johnny lets get started, tonight you're facing Sweet Jones in a number one contendership match to face Ano Doom at Glory To The Brave for the Ignition Title, how confident are you feeling?
JR: How am I feeling.... HOW AM I FEELING?!?!?! I'm feeling pretty damn good right about now. I'll show this clown what it means to be in the ring against a guy like me. I'll push him to his very limit. He got the best of me last time, but this is my chance to even up the score. I am better than him, and I will stick by what I said when I called his victory over me a fluke.
JS: Now obviously, getting the win tonight might not be a good thing in the long run, what with the winner facing the aforementioned Ano Doom. Should you be the one facing him, do you really think you have what it takes to beat a man like that?
JR: Absolutely! A man of my stature can take on anyone, including a man like Ano Doom. I have agility and leaps of strength on my side. We'll just have to see what Ano Doom can do in the ring against me. See.. I never used the word "iF" until' now because I know that I will win. I can feel it in my bones. And if I have to make it happen then I will make him feel something in his bones too... Endless amounts of pain!
JS: Now, it was mentioned on a recent show that you seem to be carrying the SWWF title around with you, don't you think that's disrespectful to a company you walked out on months ago?
JR: Lets get something straight here.. I was the best that Company had. They were never going to find somebody good enough to replace me so I took their prized Championship and bailed while I was still on top of the mighty mountain. Was it disrespectful? Maybe, maybe not! Everyone has a right to their opinion, and in my OWN personal opinion... I could care less!
*Jones walks on camera*
Jones: Really? This is who you're interviewing? You have the best talker in the business, the next EWNCW Ignition Champion free at this time, yet you decide to interview the man who's going to lose in the number one contenders match tonight. A mere mention of my name doubles ratings, so now, this is my interview! EWNCW, you're welcome.
Jones: Tonight is the night everyone! Tonight is the night I finally get what I deserve- number one contendership to the EWNCW Ignition Title! Two weeks ago I defeated not only Mint Berry Crunch, but also the man I'm going tonight Johnny Rose. Then last week I defeated Mike Hawk-easily. I should've been named number one contender right then and there but no, I apparently still need to "prove myself". Really? Prove myself? Everyone knows I'm going to win, considering I'm the number one most talented man in all of professional wrestling!
*Crowd Boos Louder*
Jones: Tommy Thunder, Ronaldo Romulus, Silver Cena, Seraphim, Ano Doom- All of those supposed "greats" pale in comparison to the legend that is Sweet Jones. So what makes Johnny Rose think he an beat me? Hmm? I'm unmatched in the ring! I was up all night partying so I'm sleep deprived, I drank a little too much booze, and partied a little too hard, but none of that matters- me at 75% is better than anyone else at 100%! All that matters is that it's time for me to realize my destiny by becoming number one contender!
*Crowd Begins To Boo Again*
Jones: So next my sights are set on you Doom. Like you know, I have no reason to be afraid of you- hell, you're probably afraid of me! You know I'll take your title, you know I'll embarrass you, and you know I'll pin you to the mat 1, 2, 3! So you may want to hug that title a little tighter these next few days, because at Glory to the Brave that title will be around my waist!
*Rose stares at Jones in disbelief at the nerve oh him interupting the interview. Jones walks off with a wink to the camera before it centers on Rose becoming visibly more angry.
BD: I think it's safe to say that the rivalry between Sweet Jones and Johnny Rose is starting to really heat up.
PK: Both men have staked their claim for a shot at Ano Doom in 3 days time and it's all going to come to a head later on tonight.
BD: It promises to be a great match by two very talented, if arrogant competitors.
PK: No arguments from me there Bob, i'm looking forward to that match, and i'm sure the elusive Ano Doom is keeping an eye on it as well.
BD: Hold on now! Sounds like EWNCW and BWA's own Freak Inc are on their way out here, do they have a match tonight?
PK: I guess so, in fact i've just been told that they'll be facing Jaws of Men. If they can get the win tonight that'll definitely help BWA's cause.
*Slither and Twisted walk out, but seem rather annoyed and angry, a different sight to their normally cheerful composure*
Bob Daniels: Is it me or do they look unhappy?
Pierce Kingmaker: No, they're damn unhappy! That might be more dangerous than they usually are, so keep them the hell away from me!
Slither: Twisted, tonight we face the Jaws of Men! A team of individuals who feel they need to blindly attack people who are unaware of their presence! They are filthy cowards who's red juice I would never taste!
Twisted: Agreed brother! Tonight when the red juice flows it will not be to feed our sickness, but for revenge! The Jaws of Men are going to regret that they ever interfered in our affairs!
Slither: SAM! We demand that you pay attention to this, as should every tag team in EWNCW and BWA! Because we are BWA Intercontinental Champions! And we will soon add every other title to our collection!
Twisted: And they will all be graced by the red juices of our enemies!
BD: Why are their voices so damn creepy!? It's just not natural, this is a family show!
PK: Not anymore Bob, any kids watching have surely gone to hide under their beds.
BD: Jaws of Men it is then! These guys have really been making ripples here on Inferno, and The Sexiest Alpha Males don't like it one bit.
PK: They've made a point of getting involved in SAM's business alright, and the two teams have been going back and forth for weeks.
BD: Lets not forget the Freak Inc were also attacked three weeks ago by this very team, there's no love lost here.
PK: No love at all.. and by the looks of it, the freaks are thirsty..
*Kanye West stronger theme plays and that can only mean one thing... The Three musketeers are here, they walk out from the back and down to the ring.*
Aurelio: Some People are born dumb and grow smart, some people are born smart and become a genius and then there are a certain type of people who start smart and work there way down the intellectual ladder.
*Crowd chants you suck*
Aurelio: Hey hold up idiots, for once i was not talking about you although i can understand why you were misconstrued, we were actually talking about the brains trust here in EWNCW
*The crowd boos*
Leonicas: These wo right here are undefeated right here in EWNCW and have shown up SAM three weeks in a row and this is after our debut when we took out the freaks and SAM at the same time
*More 'You Suck' chanting*
Shane: So instead of actually giving us a challange and actually facing someone of value, you have us take on these knobjockeys known as freak inc.
Although it is not all bad as after we destroy the freaks and deprive them of there red juice we will continue to dominate the EWNCW and hell maybeeven that crapfest known as BWA and we are going to earn every title we can get our hands on bacause we are Jackson-Mendoza - Deal With It
BD: Well big words there from Jackson and company, we'll see if they can back it up.
PK: You gotta believe that SAM are watching this very closely tonight, as they'll be facing Jaws at Glory To The Brave.
(Freak Inc/E&C vs Jaws/Acolytes)
(Stop at 4.45)
BD: What the!? It's SAM!
PK: What are they doing here!?
*SAM charge the ring and triple team Jackson as Mendoza battles Slither on the outside. The three of them pummel Jackson and Leonicas tries to make the save but gets a DDT for his troubles. The ref rings the bell of course and Jackson slides back into the ring to try and help out but is set upon by SAM instantly. One by one each member of Jaws is hit by a finishing move from SAM and are kicked out of the ring. Slither and Twisted look confused by don't get involved, choosing instead just to walk back up the ramp as SAM clean house.*
MT: Jaws of Men! How do you like a taste of your own medicine?
MT: For three consecutive weeks you have interfered in our matches, costing us the victory, trying to make your point, that you are a tough bunch of fellas. Let me tell you something, guys, if you think you are the toughest boys here, you havenâ€™t seen us enraged. You may think that we are all smiles, bragging about the ladies and how we conquer them, and disregard our in ring ability, you are making a big mistake here, fellas. As you have realized now, and thesis just the beginning, hell has no fury like the SAM on a rampage!
*More cheering and the ladies seem pleased as they scream â€œYouâ€™re our warriorsâ€*
MT: And thereâ€™s another thing. You go around trying to show the world how strong you are. Newsflash: Nobody cares!
*Crowd loudly approves*
MT: Nobody wants to see three generic fatasses boasting around about the millions of tag titles youâ€™ve ever earned, in companies they never heard of, if they even exist! They wanna hear the Males, they wanna see the Males, because they are 100% entertainment, in the ring and in the mic!
*More cheers, the ladies chant â€œWe want the Malesâ€*
MT: I know you want us, ladies, but let us finish business here!
*The females scream*
MT: Mark my words, Jaws of Men! Tonight this is just a foretaste of the beatings that await you in the near future, and that future is around the corner! YOU BETCHA!
BC: Well said my good friend, we the Sexiest Alpha Males are normally a nice laid back bunch who would kick back with a few ladies and just well nevermind.
Anyway the Jaws of Men have made all 3 of us angrier than before and if theres one thing you shouldnt do to us its make us angry because an angry Big Chief is a dangerous Big Chief.
so you 3 next time we catch you there wont be nothin to say about you guys because well leave you dead and buried beneath the greatness that is The Sexiest Alpha Males!
*the crowd go wild*
*T-Thunda is handed the mic*
T-Thunda: Dat's right! We three here, and all these people in the audience, are sick and tired of gettin' got by three little Jimmys!! You guys couldn't beat us fair and square, so you always try and blindside us and use your sneaky little tactics to try and get round us! Well, NO MORE!!
*the crowd cheer*
T-Thunda: You see, I have this little story dat I'd like to share with you, and with everyone actually. And it goes a little something like dis.
Once upon a time there were three little Jimmys, and the time came for them to leave home and seek their fortunes.
Before they left, their mother told them " Whatever you do , do it the best that you can because that's the way to get along in the world.
The first little Jimmy built his house out of straw because it was the easiest thing to do.
The second little Jimmy built his house out of sticks. This was a little bit stronger than a straw house.
The third little Jimmy built his house out of bricks.
One night the Sexiest Alpha Males, who dearly loved to hand the gottin' to fat little Jimmys, came along and saw the first little Jimmy in his house of straw. He said "Let me in, Let me in, little Jimmy or we'll huff and we'll puff and we'll blow your house in!"
"Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin", said the little Jimmy.
But of course the Sexiest Alpha Males did blow the house in and the first little Jimmy got got!
The Sexiest Alpha Males then came to the house of sticks. "Let me in ,Let me in little Jimmy or we'll huff and we'll puff and we'll blow your house in" "Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin", said the little Jimmy. But the Sexiest Alpha Males blew that house in too, and the second little Jimmy got got!
The Sexiest Alpha Males then came to the house of bricks.
" Let me in , let me in" cried the Sexiest Alpha Males
"Or we'll huff and well puff till we blow your house in"
"Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin" said the little Jimmy.
Well, the Sexiest Alpha Males huffed and puffed but they could not blow down that brick house.
BUT, the Sexiest Alpha Males were a smart old bunch, and they kicked down the damn door and the last little Jimmy got GOT TOO!!
T-Thunda: You see Jaws of Men, that's your story here, and at Glory to the Brave, I want you to to dare try and re-write that story. But I warn you, that it won't be pretty, and just like in the story, it ain't goin' to end good for the three little Jimmys!! And DAT'S da TROOF!! Da WHOLE TROOF!! And nuthin' but, DA TROOF!!
BD: Wow message sent SAM!
PK: I'm guessing Jaws of Men aren't enjoying the taste of their own medicine!
BD: We're gonna see both of these teams go at it this Sunday, in a 3 v 3 match.
PK: But Leonicas isn't a wrestler!
BD: Tough luck, Nathan Staples has stated that because he's contracted he will be fighting on Sunday.
BD: Welcome back to Inferno. Now as you know, last week Billy McCoy lost valiantly to Mark Dimension, meaning he will not be fighting for the international title at GTTB.
PK: Also meaning that Billy has decided not to attend tonights show.
BD: However we can show you the footage Billy McCoy sent us earlier today.
*McCoy is sat on the top of a remote Devonshire hill he stares downwards at the never-ending valleyâ€™s, plain green grass stretches as far as the eye can see down to McCoyâ€™s left you see a crop circle freshly cut. To his left there lies a long fence of barbed wire rusted in places, of in the distance the remains of ancient dynysty lay now as a few stones in the landscape McCoy is wearing a plain black hoodie, hood down, head up. This is a place of peace but more importantly a place of rebirth *
Billy McCoy: So it appears I have failed. I have failed in my guest to recapture the International Title, to save that Title belt from its now inevitable trashing. Ladies and Gentleman I was the last great International Champion.
And Yes I can say that, You see my reign and its subsequent ending was always being tarnished by little voices some of them on the internet, some of them in the back and worst of all some of them in the back of my own head. I WAS A GREAT CHAMPION!
I would say that McCoy has arrived and itâ€™s because of that International Championship, so hereâ€™s the way its going to go, when I come back, you get in my face I get in yours and I donâ€™t go away, I donâ€™t ever go away. When People ask I tell them that my greatest ever opponent was Solla and yes I do hate that bag of rat shit but he gets one thing right, he takes no shit.
Mark and Strem have the pay per view match it will probably be great match, and Glory to the Brave will probably be a great Pay Per View, but I wonâ€™t be there. As you can see I am not in the states, I CAME HOME.
When I come back there will be a revolution of fire and this show will be turned upside down, The Prestigious will be venerated and the faithful will have someone to cheer for again, and they will all chant for B.M.c.C!
BD: So, Billy vowing to come back bigger and better than ever.
PK: Hopefully Bob, but lets get back down to some action.
BD: Looks like we have Jones vs Rose next! This feud has been heating up something good!
PK: Yes, yes it has, and tonight it comes to a head! WHich man will lay claim to Ano Doom's title at GTTB? Tonight we will find out, if that honor goes to the Ladies Man, Jones, or to The Rose in the Garden, Johnny!
Jason: From LAS VEGAS, NEVADA! IT's THE LADIES MAN, SWEET JONES!
*Jones gets in the ring and poses for the ladies.*
From DALLAS, TEXAS, it's THE ROSE IN THE GARDEN, JOHNNY!
Jason: From DALLAS, TEXAS, it's THE ROSE IN THE GARDEN, JOHNNY!
*Johnny rushes to the ring*
Rose(MVP) vs Jones(Kane)
(Ignore ending: Ano doom rushes through the crowd when as the ref is knocked down. His belt is slammed into both competitors, and he hits his finisher on both. As they lay wasted in the ring, he hoists up his title and shows a macabre grin!)
BD: What is ANO DOING! WHY IS HE ATTACKING THEM BOTH?!
PK: He's letting them no, there is no one that can stop Doom!
*Nathan Staples appears at the top of the ramp, unhappy with what he's seeing.*
Staples: Ano Doom, no doubt you are champion, no doubt you are strong, but you will not be interrupting matches! At GTTB, it will be Ano Doom vs Johnny Rose... VERSUS, SWEET JONES!
*Ano looks down at both of his fallen victims, then back at Staples, before going back through the crowd.*
PK: A triple threat match at GTTB for Ano's title? This is a MUST SEE!
BD: Oh yes it is! I can't wait!
BD: Welcome back to Inferno, if you're just joining us you've missed quite a show so far. We have a new number one contender for the Ignition Title, or two of them anyway.
PK: Sure have, Ano Doom just reappeared after weeks of silence and he returned with a bang, taking out Johnny Rose and Sweet Jones.
BD: So in 3 days time we'll be having a triple threat for the Inferno Ignition Title at Glory To The Brave.
PK: Indeed Bob, but as for right now, we're heading to Nathan Staples office to find out who Gillz and King Strem will be facing later on.
*We turn our attention to Nathan Staples office where he is busy with some documents at his desk. There is a knock at the door.*
Staples: Come in.
*Tommy Thunder walks in with a broad smile on his face. The same can't be said about Staples.*
Thunder: Why so glum Staples? Did Gillz steal your lunch money or something?
Staples: No Tommy, it's you. I'm not happy with the way you were goading Gillz into trying to attack you last week. I put that no contact clause in place for a reason, and you were clearly trying to get him to violate it. It's not on.
Thunder: Oh come on! I was hardly goading him! I was just having a little fun! And besides there's nothing you can do about it since he never actually touched me.
Staples: Honestly? There is something I can do about it. I should punish you, but instead you know what I'm going to do? I'm lifting the no contact clause altogether!
Thunder: Great! Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go and find a certain someone and kick his ass!
Staples: Not so fast there. While on one hand I've lifted the clause, there is a reason I've done this. It's for tonight's main event. Because we're going to see Gillz teaming with King Strem taking on you and your partner.
Thunder: And who exactly is that?
Staples: Well, he's standing just behind you in fact.
*Thunder turns around and is startled to see the massive Mark Dimension standing directly behind him after appearing out of nowhere.*
Dimension: I OverHeard The Talk Thomas , And Over The Tag Situation with Us Tonight, Its Doesn't Matter or Mean Much on My End As Long As We Get One Thing Correct..We Go In and Get Out that's a Fighter Classic .. Job To Be Done With Both of Us Beatin The Shit Outta Both of Them.. All I Ask That When you Put your Hands On Gillz and Havem Runnin to The Corner And He Tags The Retard Wit Da Plastic Crown ,
**Gets IN Thunder's FACE**
Dimension: YOU!...give Me That TAG So I Can Give The Pain and Punishment I Am Known For and If He Pussyfoot's Around and Brings in GiLLz Then I Return the Favor By Leavin Gillz with a Inch of LiFe Left after I Givem a Swift kick in da Ass!
So You Can Really Enjoy putting that twit thru misery..Just ReMember ONE THING TOM T. , That Piece of shit Strem is Mine And I Plan on Goin In For The Kill!
**Dimension gets Angry clutchin his fist**
Dimension: ...And Nathan I Suggest You Release Him ,Cuz Tonight His Blood will Be on your Hands and if Gillz Dies too...SO BE IT.
*Staples and Thunder just look at each other.*
Staples: Uhh.. good luck Tom..
*Tommy facepalms and then walks out with Dimension following him*
BD: So it looks like we're gonna get a preview of two matches at GTTB with Gillz and Strem taking on Tommy and Dimension.
PK: He lifted the no contact clause!? Well it's about damn time, this is wrestling, not.. erm.. badminton?
BD: Nice save Pierce, nice save.
BD: Blockbuster announcement before the commercial break there! Tommy Thunder teaming up with.. with.. Mark Dimension..
PK: That team just screams implosion Bob.
BD: Well, they'll be facing their respective opponents at Glory To The Brave, which should be enough to keep these two focused on the task at hand.
PK: Dimension is unstable though, but what i'm most surprised with is Staples decision to lift the no contact clause, but I guess it was just a matter of time before this boiled over anyway.
BD: We saw this man earlier in the night attacking Alex Kidd as a reprisal from last week when Kidd intervened and stopped Lansdale trying to injure Flying Dutchman.
PK: An eye for an eye Bob, Lansdale sent a message to Kidd that he won't tolerate people getting involved in his affairs.
BD: Lansdale went too far last week, and week prior to that, he's got a real attitude problem with stopping once the final bell rings.
PK: You've heard what he's trying to do though! Purge peoples impurities through fire and pain, maybe Dutchman had a really big one?
*Lansdale strides out from behind the curtain, anger lining his face, no flag in his hands, he means business. Ravensdell follows, the flag in her possession, she waves it behind Arthur as they walk to the ring. The fans booing as usual, Lansdale yells at a few members of the front row before storming down the ramp in disgust, clearly in a temper. He climbs the steps and slides through the ropes and pulls his microphone from his jacket pocket.*
Lansdale: Enough of your idle prattle... i demand silence, for what I have to say is deadly seriously.
*The crowds booing increased in volume, taking great pleasure from watching Lansdale fume.*
Lansdale: I said silence! All of you! You witnessed earlier, what happens to the fools that dare stick their noses into my business. Last week as I was displaying why I, Arthur Lansdale, am the greatest technical wrestler in EWNCW, the amoebic reject known as Alex Kidd dared to step into my ring and interupt my teachings. I was not finished.. my work was not done.. and for Alex Kidd to end my class prematurely is intolerable!
*The boos continue, accompanied by a 'Lansdale Sucks!' chant.*
Lansdale: And so, as you saw earlier, I made an example of that pitiful little worm.. I destroyed him.. not only will Alex Kidd not be seen again tonight, he will not be seen in an EWNCW ring ever again, and that is a fact. Kidd, if you are listening to me through all of the blood in your ears, know this, you got off lightly, be thankful that I left you with the ability to walk.. but be warned, if you ever show your face here again, I will make sure that for the rest of your life, you will never leave your hospital bed.
*Lansdale sneers towards the camera before continuing.*
Lansdale: However, Kidds foolish interference aside.. I am doubly frustrated. Despite my impressive run of victories.. I have been overlooked, to face the freak show Ano Doom as Glory To The Brave.. this is unacceptable. Nathan Staples, I demand you come to the ring at once, and insert me into the triple threat match for the Inferno Ignition Title.
*Lansdale turns to the ramp awaiting a response.*
BD: Wait a minute.. that's not.. that's The Great Cobra!
PK: Yeah! Maybe he's out here to recruit Lansdale to the Cobra Army!
BD: I'm not sure Lansdale is going to be a willing participant to that sort of thing..
PK: Maybe you're right, but I bet that won't stop Cobra trying!
*Cobra walks out onto the ramp and points down at Lansdale with a mic in his hand.*
Cobra: You! Land Salesman! Enough of the talk, time is for Cobra Army to rise and become ruler of EWNCW!
I make you Sergeant of cleaning the smelly toilet bowls, you get big response hill billity!! Shiny belts is for Great Cobra, only Cobra can fight I know dumb at the Glory Brave!
Now be ready Mr Landing Sails because Cobra teach you how to clean toilet bowl with tongue after I give you much pain from firey fist, yes?0
*Lansdale glares up at Cobra, less than amused, removing his jacket he waits for him to get in the ring.*
BD: Uhm.. well, there ya go folks.. Nathan Staples clearly not interested in talking to Lansdale.. and The Great Cobra himself has decided to come out...
PK: I'm not too sure Cobra wants to get in the ring right now.. Lansdale looks pretty angry..
(Lansdale/Barrett vs Cobra/Santino)
(Stop at 5.58)
BD: Great side slam from Lansdale and he has no hesitation in going for the Lansdale Lockdown!
PK: Cobra's trying to fight out but Lansdale has it locked in tight!
BD: With holds like this the more you fight the more energy you burn and the less likely it is that you'll escape!
PK: The referee is checking! It's over!
*The ref calls for the ball and Lansdale releases the hold, the ref goes to raise his arm but Lansdale pushes him away and begins stomping on Cobra. The ref tries to intervene but Lansdale throws him from the ring uncerimoneously, determined to hurt Cobra further.*
BD: Get someone out here, Lansdale is going to do serious damage!
PK: I told you Cobra should have got into the ring with him!
*The crowd boo Lansdale furiously as he locks Cobra into a kneebar, wrenching his leg tight and trying to dislocate the knee. The boos turn to cheers instantly as Alex Kidd charges the ring, having recovered since earlier. Kidd kicks Lansdale in the face and he releases the hold, jumping to his feet he's met by furious punches again and again by Kidd. Lansdale is forced from the ring and Kidd yells insults at him as he retreats up the ramp with Ravensdell.*
BD: Kidd to the rescue again! There's bad blood between these two, this definitely won't be the last we see of it.
PK: Kidd is really pushing Lansdale buttons, both men really want to do harm to each other.
*Kidd continues to yell at Lansdale, the cameras pick up 'I'll see you on Sunday Lansdale!'*