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wil2197

Random Thoughts: Impact Wrestling 8-8-13

Rating: 3 votes, 3.67 average.
It’s time to pick on TNA again. Now this will be the third week straight that I pick on these poor bastards. Now, it’s not because I hate them. Quite the contrary, I’ve been looking forward to TNA the most every week. The BFG series is clearly the best reason to tune in to their program. But...the last two weeks, the stories have sucked, they really have. The lawsuit, the August 1st mystery, it’s just been bad. And my scores may have not truly reflected what I felt about the shows. That’ll be the norm with me. You really have to pay more attention to my content rather than the scores. Within the bad jokes is the hidden truth, so the scores don’t always tell the whole story...or even tell the story correctly. So, I’ll try to grade my thoughts more accurately this time around. I personally try not to read spoilers, so while many people last week at least have an idea of how this show is gonna be tonight, I’m in the dark. So come with me as we venture into another Bischoff-approved TNA.

...ugh...

Main Attraction: Impact Wrestling 8-8-13

Nuts, it was good while it lasted
So Taz is back. And he threw Tenay out. Well...we might as well mute the television tonight.

Poor poor Borash
So Aces come out and Taz is back to reclaim his spot at the announcer’s table with Mr. Anderson joining along. Well there might be a little bit of hope if Mr. Anderson is allowed to talk. Before Taz reclaims his spot, he has some words for Jeremy.

“This is my table, you hear me? My table! WWE wouldn’t take me back, so this is my table! They wouldn’t use me for a RAW in my hometown of Brooklyn, so this is my table! They said they had no interest, that there’s no one in TNA that they need, especially a wrestler turned half-ass announcer like me, so this is my table! You here, my table! Because they just wouldn’t take me so..this is...my...table...”

*proceeds to collapse, crying, yelling “WHY!!!!!”*

Bully should learn to read
So Bully mentions how he wasn’t impressed with the August 1st Mystery (gee, no kidding) and says nobody does surprises better than him. Nobody in TNA does surprises well...period. He then calls out Sabin so they can sign the contract. Sabin comes out and Bully mentions he hates how the title looks on him. Personally, I like the wearing the title like a sash look. Brooke then comes out and mentions her father isn’t here tonight (another episode without Hogan? Things are on an upswing) and also mentions a little something that he overlooked in his rematch clause.

Turns out if Bully loses his rematch, he can never get another World Title match again...ever...for the rest of his life. Men in black will follow him from promotion to promotion ensuring he doesn’t ask for another title. His phone lines will be monitored to make sure he doesn’t call a promoter at three in the morning asking for a title match. If he comes within 15 yards of a championship, gps monitoring systems will alert a special government task force whose job is to make sure that a wrestler honors his “No World Title for Life” clause. Some people may call it wasteful spending, but it still makes more sense than Obamacare.

...I’d be scared of being flamed after doing that joke, but I know liberals don’t watch wrestling.

Perhaps Bully should have looked past the clause where he gets a lifetime supply of Twinkies if he gets the rematch. Bully is refusing to sign the contract...but one sexual insult from Brooke later and we have ourselves a main event for the Free Per View spectacular, Hardcore Justice.

I love Bound for Glory
Nine out of ten times you’ll get great matches. Samoa Joe and Jeff Hardy is one of those Nine times. Joe tried to net himself 10 points, but surprisingly Jeff Hardy picks up the pinfall victory.

Trouble in Paradise
Daniels thinks Kazarian...or Frankie (awww)...is being selfish. I wonder who’ll have to buy the flowers.

That was...Roode.
Get it? Cause it’s a play on the word Rude. It’s funny, HA! So Mr. Anderson’s match is next, and luckily he doesn’t have far to walk considering he’s at the announcer’s table. And I’ve gotta say, Magnus is the future. TNA better not botch him. Mr. Anderson puts up a valiant effort, but it would take Roode running in with a steel chair, hitting Anderson and taking 10 points away from Magnus. Quite clever.

Roode calls himself a genius
And that he is. I look forward to more of his antics.

Magnus tells the ref he doesn’t hold it against him
Awwwww...

Ummm...are Bromans...are they planning for their gay wedding?
They just told a hot chick to get out of their dressing room, so what do you think?

August 1st Recap
Ah crap...we’re about to go downhill, aren’t we.

Sabin tells Main Event Mafia he has a planning
Uh oh...goody two shoes has been scheming.

What the hell was the point
Jeremy calls Tito Ortiz a Bellator Superstar. Be nice of him to fight a match first before giving him that honorary title. So Tito is asked why is he here, but I hope you don’t care, cause he’ll never answer. Angle comes out, warning Tito to respect his space. And Tito does the worst delivery of the line “Loud and clear” that I have ever heard...in my entire life. Bully then comes out telling Tito to keep his “stupid face” out of his way. Bully leaves. Angle leaves. Jeremy forgets he was doing an interview. Pointless. There’s seven minutes we’ll never see again people.

The Tag Team Champs graces us with their presence
They’re teamed with ODB against...ugh...the Bromans and...*boing*...Mickie James. During the match TNA 10 Reunion PPV event is advertised. Yea, good luck finding that on your local Cable and Satellite provider. You’ll probably find CBS a lot easier. ODB and company picks up the win in a decent match, but she’s then attacked by Gail Kim. Gunner and Storm don’t really do a good job protecting their tag team partner, who’s then hit from behind by Mickie James.

...ummm...Bro’s before Ho’s?

Okay...now show us your storyline for the tag team champs...you don’t have one, do you.

Kazarian still upset Chris said “Poor Frankie”
...we may need a box of chocolates for this.

They won that many tag team titles!?
Impressive. Bully is looking forward to beating respect into Sabin while Devon is looking to send the Mafia a message that someone is going home next week. I guess Devon is gonna tell them that he’s gonna lose next week.

(Insert Cat Fighting Noises Here)
This is a quickie. Nothing too special till the ending when Daniels and Kazarian both elect to be double counted out together.

Awww...it’s like a cheesy ending to a romantic comedy :-)

Then Bobby Roode comes out (WTF) to announce while everyone has been paying attention to other useless crap, himself and Bad Influence have been ignored, and form an alliance together.

...I think that kinda contradicts the “Do things for himself” character he’s presented to us for the past two weeks. Meh, we’ll see where it goes.

Tito told there’s a lot of questions for him
Just promises to hit people next week.

A “Meh” World Champ
So Sabin’s master plan for the main event? Bring Sting out as his partner. But...I think Angle was hitting the sauce before the match, cause he’s suddenly out there beating up on Bully and Devon, and now Angle is his partner.

...oh there isn’t gonna be a strong enough flame proof suit for that.

And look, I’m just not sold on Sabin being World Champ. They make him wimp out every time he’s in the ring. Look, he can’t just do good against people his own size...please, give him a chance to fight. He does get a second wind in the end, predictably, and picks up the pinfall victory on Bully. But...I just wish he would’ve had a more well-rounded performance like Angle. I hope the main event next week shows a more even showing before Sabin drops the title, otherwise this first title reign of his will be easily forgotten.

The Verdict
Well, we knew any August 1st follow-up would suck, but this wasn’t a bad show. There’s a couple of things I wish they would’ve done differently, but overall I liked it. The wrestling was good, anything with Roode was my favorite part of the show, and Daniels and Kazarian are living happily ever after. What more can you ask for?

Four Angle DW....uhhhh, Four out of five.

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Updated 08-09-2013 at 04:16 AM by wil2197

Categories
Thoughts and Opinions

Comments

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  1. JohnnyV123's Avatar
    This episode just goes to show you that you can't judge a show by spoilers. This sounded like it was going to be awful and it turned out to be pretty good. Not one of their best showings but definitely enough to enjoy.

    TNA is on their "bring back what people liked in the past" streak (bringing back Sonjay Dutt, Petey Williams, the Main Event Mafia) and returned the top form Bobby Roode. What made Roode great is that he was a great wrestler but then also a cheater when he needs to be. Great stuff. I don't mind him teaming with Bad Influence if it's to help each other out rather than to be a new stable.

    Hardy vs. Joe was great although end seemed a bit botched to me. Didn't quite connect that Anderson was distracting Joe, but oh well.

    That stupid Tito Ortiz/Angle/Bully Ray segment. It felt so rushed and lacked any focus.

    The crowd actually made me excited to see Storm and Gunner but it was a bummer that ODB didn't get a tag in the match. In her return she showed much more variety in her offense than I have seen from her in the past and I was looking forward to her and Mickie wrestling.

    Feel free to laugh, but I think Jesse Godderz has a future as a high midcarder. Seems like he has personality, great intensity, and he did a good job of selling getting the taste kicked out of his mouth.

    I liked that final tag match but I agree with you that Sabin should have gotten more legitimate offense in. I will be very disappointed if next week's match is a "I'll hurt your arm" vs. "I'll hurt your knee" cage match. Both guys can go, so show what they can do.
  2. JohnnyV123's Avatar
    Oh and I love Magnus, but give him a real dang finisher! The Magnus driver (which we didn't see tonight) is not working for me and although the top rope elbow drop is cool too many people have done it in the past.
  3. johnnyvine's Avatar
    Well I did read the spoilers, just to see if I wanted to watch this week.
    The show wasn't as good as I thought it would be.
    We start off with Taz and Anderson doing their best NWO impersonations, bullying announcers.
    Then we have to sit and listen to both do commentary.........eeewwwww
    Of course we get Bully to open the in ring stuff.....Brooke stop calling him Mark.

    Joe vs Hardy match was good, but Joe gets pinned because Anderson stood up?

    Another MMA fighter in the ring for Angle to tell them, this is my ring, you better respect it.
    They go ok and shake hands..
    Again another good match with Daniels and Kaz, but the ending, I guess it was ok.

    Totally skipped through the tag match with Storm and Gunner, ODB.

    Then finally we get Sabin and his Mafia partner, and it's Sting.....Taz goes all no no no that's not fair.
    Ugh!! Oh well it's not Sting but Angle.
    Sabin shows again that NO he is not World Championship material.
    Unfortunately he needs the likes of Sting and Angle to help boost him up, into championship material.
    He really needs to show some strength in the cage, and win to get that momentum, of being thought as a World Champ.

    The BFG series matches were good, the endings not so much.
    Overall a decent but not great show.
  4. Darkside Ron Garvin's Avatar
    Personally, I'd rather get the time back used to read this mediocre attempt at humorous troll comments you might think to be “jokes” on the evaluation of a show before I asked back for the time spent watching the Angle/Bully/Ortiz segment. Sorry man, but you flavor of obviously negative humor is just not my thing. Don't worry about the need of FRC garments from this as I am not going to pick on you for your choice towards a cheap attempt to garner a reaction from both anti and pro TNA wrestling fans. I just find it sad that this is what some think to be a good usage of their time rather than actually improving in some form or facet of life.
  5. wil2197's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Darkside Ron Garvin
    Personally, I'd rather get the time back used to read this mediocre attempt at humorous troll comments you might think to be “jokes” on the evaluation of a show before I asked back for the time spent watching the Angle/Bully/Ortiz segment. Sorry man, but you flavor of obviously negative humor is just not my thing. Don't worry about the need of FRC garments from this as I am not going to pick on you for your choice towards a cheap attempt to garner a reaction from both anti and pro TNA wrestling fans. I just find it sad that this is what some think to be a good usage of their time rather than actually improving in some form or facet of life.
    And here we all are watching fake wrestling on a weekly basis rather than improving in some form or facet of life. I don't mind that you don't like the blog, but the last line was hillarious
  6. Darkside Ron Garvin's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by wil2197
    And here we all are watching fake wrestling on a weekly basis rather than improving in some form or facet of life. I don't mind that you don't like the blog, but the last line was hillarious


    Glad to have amused you by my "hallarious" commentary. While I am fully behind the picking apart of flaws in effort to open the forum for discussion on the topic, the non-sensible diatribes and ramblings in your blog where quite anti-climactic for the amount of effort spent typing up said ramblings. I'd figure a scripted show centered on false fighting to have moments that aren't so much logical in thought, but I guess I expect more out of people in life who aren’t participating in said “scripted show” but rather are sadly expressing such anti-logical thoughts as being true thoughts. Like I said, your cheap shot humor seems something more suited towards a younger crowd who is more into the adolescent humor you present. But don't be offended by this; I'm not a fan of Regular Show or Adventure Time either.



    It's just part of growing older I suppose; I'd prefer to read something that sparks interest and discussion as opposed to ones failed attempt to humorously point out all the things they don't like in order to get a rise out of those who are fans of a product, or a following out of those who dislike a product. Reading what you have posted leads me to believe you would have (or could have been) one of the people who participated in the #AskDixie debacle, which only furthered to confirm the stereotype that those inside the wrestling industry has about people like us; the members of the IWC are childish idiots. Just because we enjoy such a silly product doesn’t mean we should support this idea of being brain dead dumb in real life.
  7. wil2197's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Darkside Ron Garvin

    Glad to have amused you by my "hallarious" commentary. While I am fully behind the picking apart of flaws in effort to open the forum for discussion on the topic, the non-sensible diatribes and ramblings in your blog where quite anti-climactic for the amount of effort spent typing up said ramblings. I'd figure a scripted show centered on false fighting to have moments that aren't so much logical in thought, but I guess I expect more out of people in life who aren’t participating in said “scripted show” but rather are sadly expressing such anti-logical thoughts as being true thoughts. Like I said, your cheap shot humor seems something more suited towards a younger crowd who is more into the adolescent humor you present. But don't be offended by this; I'm not a fan of Regular Show or Adventure Time either.



    It's just part of growing older I suppose; I'd prefer to read something that sparks interest and discussion as opposed to ones failed attempt to humorously point out all the things they don't like in order to get a rise out of those who are fans of a product, or a following out of those who dislike a product. Reading what you have posted leads me to believe you would have (or could have been) one of the people who participated in the #AskDixie debacle, which only furthered to confirm the stereotype that those inside the wrestling industry has about people like us; the members of the IWC are childish idiots. Just because we enjoy such a silly product doesn’t mean we should support this idea of being brain dead dumb in real life.
    I wish you were a fan of Regular Show or Adventure Time, so you could tell me what the hell those are.

    I'm growing older myself, an even thirty right now, and I also enjoy the intelligent debate over a wide variety of topics, including Wrestling. There's nothing wrong with that, we don't need to be brain dead dumb. And I fully respect that their are more intelligent blogs like the person that has tried to spark a meaningful, as hard as it is, conversation on Chris Benoit (although I think doing a second blog on his son was a little much). I like those blogs. Personally, I prefer to go against the grain in this case. I don't think it means that this blog is brain dead dumb, although you are entitled to say that. This is the style I choose to present, and it will not be enjoyed by all, even a vast majority in a community that does tend to get quite hostile towards one another. That's fine. If someone doesn't like one entry, I fully don't expect them to read another entry.

    You see, it's fine not to like my blogs, hate my blogs, print them out and spit on them, perfectly fine. And I don't agree with your comments on me being a "troll", I personally call it a sense of humor (something I feel the IWC does lack nowadays), I still considered it to be a valid critique. And you're point was pretty much made. When you decide to post this line, "I just find it sad that this is what some think to be a good usage of their time rather than actually improving in some form or facet of life," and there it is. There's the perception of being prickish snobs that follows around the IWC. Although quite frankly, the fact that you go around the internet yourself reading wrestling blogs and choosing whether to praise or denounce, shows me that if I need to go to someone to teach me how to improve my life, you're on the bottom of the list.

    PS - Don't ever accuse me of participating in the Twitter crap that wrestling promotion like to take advantage of.
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