Random Throughts: A Raw Scolding and Another Raw Review
by, 05-15-2013 at 01:58 PM (3510 Views)
Oh boy...am I waving the naughty finger. An overall very unspectacular RAW to talk about, but first thing first...and oh boy, am I pissed.
The Double Standard
So, last week on an episode of Impact Wrestling, Christy Hemme did the ultimate evil. She made a mistake while announcing. As discipline, Austin Aries got up on the turnbuckle, sticking his crotch just inches from her face, showing her that mistakes shall not be tolerated and that she better start behaving like a good little girl, right?
WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!! What Austin Aries did was crapt, and he should be disciplined for it...because IT WAS SEXUAL HARASSMENT. And in a culture properly educated about how to interact with the opposite sex, you would think that the comments would be a bit more on the reasonable side. Here are a couple that have more vote upâ€™s, than vote downâ€™s.
â€œFire Hemme... She is a waste of moneyâ€ 8Ups...1Down
â€œWho is she to get special treatment, any redhead could take her job lol, shut up and accept your paycheck. Her only chance for success outside of TNA would be porn anyway, might as well prepare for it.â€ 8ups...5Downs
Now, donâ€™t get me wrong...there are people out there that are in touch with reality, but it seems to be that public opinion is on Austin Aries side because, well hey, heâ€™s a good wrestler.
Well, Iâ€™m going to put it bluntly...if you donâ€™t want Austin Aries to be disciplined because it might cause him a big push in the long run...youâ€™re stupid. End of story. Well..maybe I should go more into it.
Now, any incident when a member of the opposite sex does something to another in a manner such as shoving genitalia into anotherâ€™s face cannot be easily dismissed. Now, I think we wrestling fans are so easily dismissing it because quite frankly, wrestling has portrayed these ladies as nothing more than overly glorified borderline porn stars. Itâ€™s true, theyâ€™ve overly sexualized women for well over 15 years at least. So, when a legit incident comes up where a female is, in correct definition might I add, sexually harassed...well, we have a hard time in reacting properly to the incident. And it doesnâ€™t make wrestling fans look good, but rather makes the people who quite frankly goes nuts over fake competition as out of touch with reality.
And hereâ€™s the reality. A double standard does exist. Sexual Harassment is still an issue that women can face repercussion for if they simply report it. Christy Hemme is facing that repercussion right now from the negative sentiment of wrestling fans. This is such a major issue in the Military, that the Air Force officer that was in charge of investigating Sexual Harassment cases was himself charged with Sexual Harassment. Thatâ€™s pretty bad. Weâ€™re in the 21st century and some women still make the tough, and wrong choice, of keeping quiet about it because quite frankly it may not be worth it to them to psychologically deal with the backlash of the accusations. Look at what a lot of you people are doing. This is not a â€œno big dealâ€ issue. This is a huge deal. So huge that companies, businesses, and institutions both public and private, will spend countless of dollars on training employees about sexual harassment.
So the fact that some of you will be quick to defend Austin Aries because heâ€™s such a good wrestler, and she did make a mistake when announcing, is shameful...just shameful. You shouldnâ€™t even dare represent the so called Internet Wrestling Community, if such a thing exists. You people give wrestling fans a terrible reputation of immaturity and idiocy. Thank you for making us look bad.
Main Attraction: Raw 5/13/13
Ugh, Who Exactly was Asking For This?
Well...the script dictates that this is the highly anticipated dance off...yea, right. My latest bowl movement is more anticipated than this. Fandango uses some dirty tactics and attacks Jericho before he even got a chance to show off any moves.
Why that brings me to tears...of joy.
But I tell you what, as much as I am not a huge fan of Fandango...this was actually some pretty good build. Honestly it was probably the best segment of the night.
Now before you all trace my IP address and approach my door with pitchforks and torches...or holding up your Iphones of pictures of pitchforks and torches...letâ€™s see if we can try to separate the character from the actual person.
I have no problems with Curtis Johnathan Hussey. Hell, I think he is working the hardest out of anyone in the WWE right now. The problem is that the character heâ€™s been given is really...really...bad. I mean even in this PG era of wrestling, the Ballroom Dancing wrestler seems to have been dropped into the wrong era. It may have fit in the 90â€™s, where we had clowns, garbagemen, and whatever the hell Bastion Booger was, running around the WWF. We like characters to be a bit out there sometimes, but within a certain realm of reality at the same time. A Ballroom Dancer turned wrestler, dancing around the ring every week, when even today you have the likes of Mark Henry and Ryback, doesnâ€™t exactly scream Main Event. So to not only try to force feed us this concept, and debut him at Wrestlemania of all places, taking spots away from others more deserving like Cody Rhodes or even The Miz, AND not even allowing us to see a wide array of his talent in that debut match, is not only going to fail to win over a fanbase that tends to be tough to please nowadays, but will also cause that fanbase to be at times very overly critical. And thatâ€™s a problem when sometimes, not only is he not as bad as we all think he is on delivering a promo, but can at times be in fact...very good.
And thatâ€™s the example we have here. Although I do not like the character, for the most part Curtis has owned it. I think he has portrayed the character of a self-centered ballroom dancer as best as possibly can, and at times he does nail it. I mean look at what is being demanded of him...a self-centered ballroom dancer. For the most part, when heâ€™s out there he does own this character. And although sometimes it may not be enough to win us over, I truly donâ€™t think this is one of those times. I was very impressed with him tonight. I was impressed with the segment tonight, as surprising as that is. Perhaps my tune wouldâ€™ve changed if they wouldâ€™ve actually gone through with the stupid dance contest, but I think blowing it off to build heat was definitely the best way to go.
And now a series of painfully, short, matches. I mean it is despicable how short most of the matches were tonight. Although admittedly itâ€™s two wrestlers who you would expect to have a short match for two entirely different reasons. On the one end...Ryback. On the other end...Ryder. Guess who won.
For those who said Ryder...wow...youâ€™re a dumbass.
Quick! You Donâ€™t Have a Ton of Time
Another quickie. This time Tons of Funk and Prime Time Players. Every time I see Tons of Funk, I just hope that Karl Anderson will run into the ring, slap Albert across the head, and call him an idiot. Well, my wish didnâ€™t come true again, but surprisingly the Prime Time Players picked up the win....wow.
I Still Donâ€™t Understand This General Manager Hierarchy
I mean seriously, I understand that Teddy Long is not the General Manager of Smackdown. But come to think of it, Vickie Guerrero isnâ€™t technically the General Manager of Raw either (when the hell are they going to resolve that anyway), so...why does Teddy Long need permission from Vickie Guerrero to change the WHC triple threat match into a number one contenderâ€™s match? Shouldnâ€™t he be asking the permission of Vince McMahon, or at the very least HHH?
Ah screw it, letâ€™s try to figure out the hierarchy anyway.
So first we got Vickie, then Iâ€™m assuming Brad Maddox is still around, Iâ€™m not sure I missed a couple of episodes. So next would probably be Hornswoggle, heâ€™s VKMâ€™s son after all and a former GM himself...and former Cruiserweight Champion (ugh). Then we got Todd from accounting, Larry who washes the wrestlers laundry, Mike the janitor (FYI, was tempting to call this dude Jose but decided to dodge the bullet there), Rachel the secretary to Mike the Janitor, Steve who makes Donut runs for all the wrestlers, the Hooker that VKM picked up on the corner of Parsons and Liberty that one night, and finally the Smackdown GM and so forth.
Howâ€™d I do?
Brilliant Hype to a Match...Thatâ€™s Not Taking Place
Yea, so Sandow comes out declaring that Kingstonâ€™s US Title reign will come to an end soon. Well, thatâ€™s a brilliant half ass approach to build a PPV match...six days before the event. Then we later learn that the US title will be on the line between Kofi Kingston and...Dean Ambrose.
...Wow...we just went from half assing it to no assing it. Why the hell even have Sandow say ANYTHING about the US title. I mean look, the writing is on the wall. Kofi was clearly just a short term transitional champ. We all know Ambrose is getting the strap on Sunday. So we all know that a Sandow/Kingston match for the US title just will simply not happen.
I mean did the writers not know this and just give Sandow those lines by accident? Ugh, you know, thatâ€™s the problem with logic in the WWE...itâ€™s rare.
Another quickie out of the way. Gee, I think thereâ€™s been a total of...what...five minutes of wrestling? Thank god for that, cause I know I donâ€™t watch a wrestling show for the wrestling. Heh...thatâ€™d be stupid.
Ah, Check This Moment Off My Bucket List
I think there may have been some divine intervention here, as I prayed really really hard for Josh Matthews to put that strap on.
Sheamus comes out and they start whipping each others asses. But, Iâ€™m confused. This Sunday, is the strap going to be made readily available to whip each other with? Or arenâ€™t they going to be attached to an end of the strap, hence making all the whipping that weâ€™ve been seeing as of late pointless come Sunday.
Orton versus THE MOST BORINGEST WRESTLER TO EVER PUT ON WRESTLING BOOTS...EVER
Or so Cesaro has been dubbed by the WWE, and remember...if the WWE dubs you as such, then you might as well slit your wrist...or I guess thatâ€™s what they would like you to believe. Yea, nevermind that he was probably given a crappy ass gimmick to work with to begin with. If youâ€™re told to dress up in a dog turd outfit and sell it to the fans...and commit the ultimate sin of failing to make one of WWEâ€™s â€œgeniusâ€ ideas work, you damn well better believe itâ€™s because YOU are worthless, as WWE can do no wrong...ever.
Miz and Slater in...Another Wrestling Match?
Ah! Take it away! Take it away! Please donâ€™t stop shoving HHH/Brock down our throats. WWE has almost shown a full twenty minutes of wrestling out of nearly ninety minutes. Clearly thatâ€™s WAY too much.
Next Creative Move: Taking Away Credibility for the COOLEST THING THEY HAVE GOING
Okay, look...this was obviously the best match of the night. The six man elimination tag team match had all the hallmarks of a PPV style match, and it almost delivered...almost. The only problem is that in the end, it seemed to dwindle down to more pointless pandering to the Super Cena persona. Ugh, I mean the ending was poor. Now, I guess they thought in order to make The Shield look strong they had to eliminate Team Hell No and outnumber Cena, but when they did that they inadvertently made The Shield look weak. Here, not only has this team been decimating the competition in the past several months, but they had been beating the crap out of Cena through most of the match. By having Cena completely start to destroy The Shield when itâ€™s left to just him only serves to make The Shield and Team Hell No look weak. There were six wrestlers in this ring, and five of them essentially did not come out looking better in the end all because they continue with this Super Cena crap. What we shouldâ€™ve seen was both teams trading blows and pin falls...making it look exciting. When you whittle it down to John Cena versus The Shield, it doesnâ€™t look exciting at all because we all know whatâ€™s about to happen. I guess the WWE didnâ€™t want The Shield to suffer pin falls so early in the match, or to Team Hell No anyway...but hell, you guys kinda build yourself into a corner by making the match a six man elimination tag. Youâ€™re going to need The Shield to lose participants in order to make the match exciting. Once Daniel Bryan got eliminated, Iâ€™m sure the same words was going through everyoneâ€™s head...
Same Old S***.
Oh yea, then Ryback came out and remembered to attack the foot this time, cause missing that opportunity last week was a bit of a DEE-DEE-DEE moment.
AHHH!!!! MORE WRESTLING!!!!
My God, WWE. Four matches in a row? This is such...a cultural shock...I need to sit down and take a breather.
And to WWEâ€™s credit, two words that I canâ€™t believe Iâ€™m putting next to each other, itâ€™s a good match. And I hope it leads to something bigger for Big E Langston, because it is a shame that heâ€™s not in the PPV.
Itâ€™s also a shame we saw Alberto Del Rio...it is always a shame.
The Mystery of Kaitlynâ€™s crush continues...oh yea, and thereâ€™s a Divaâ€™s match.
Yea, the match is kind of a footnote as the main focus is on the gift sent to her by her secret...HORNSWOGGLE!!!! Itâ€™s that goddamn little leprechaun turd Hornswoggle. But...WWE is going to keep dragging this out, arenâ€™t they...
And no, I donâ€™t remember what the gift was that she got. Iâ€™m surprised it wasnâ€™t a little pot of gold.
...I really donâ€™t care...
Forgive me for not having a hard on for the big HHH/Brock Lesnar face to face, but I really donâ€™t give a damn about this feud anymore. There were many options for WWE to go with, and they panicked and gave us this crap. And you know, it kinda does take away from their big showdown at Wrestlemania that theyâ€™re meeting again so soon at a PPV that, and Iâ€™m not sure if Iâ€™m in the majority or minority here, really isnâ€™t a big deal. Kinda just a throwaway. But whatever, Heyman was good but other than that, Iâ€™m sure this confrontation pleased someone out there in the WWE-verse.
I really didnâ€™t comment much on the matches, and thereâ€™s a good reason for that...there was nothing to comment on! My god, without the six man tag match, there was just about thirty minutes of wrestling...IN A THREE HOUR PROGRAM. Iâ€™m sorry, but thatâ€™s crap. Even in the attitude era, where WWE was filling a lot of their air time with promos, there was still a lot more wrestling than this. With the exception of two matches, no one got a chance to really shine. No one got a chance to really wow. The wrestling on the wrestling show was a filler. It was just a really lacking show. In the six weeks since that amazing show in Jersey, the decline has been slow, steady, and painful. And, they did it. Six days before the PPV and they have hit bottom. Tell me again why I should invest a hefty fifty dollar sum on this show?
Two more painfully boring ideas to give Antonio Cesaro to further sabotage his wrestling career...out of five.