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Why Ryback, Clay and Lord Tensai are boring

Rating: 3 votes, 1.67 average.
I know I may get a lot of hate for this blog, but hear me out. I'm not saying that they suck or saying that I don't like them, I just find them boring. Here are a couple reasons why:

1. Squash matches - I know that Clay's matches are starting to get longer and that now Clay's taking SOME hits, but what about Ryback and Tensai? They're matches are short, and usually feature jobbers. Now I also know that Tensai did face Cena in the main event, but that wasn't a main event worthy match. Ryback, Clay, and Tensai all need to find someone who isn't a typical jobber, and I know that this is because of the WWE Scripters, but come on. Enough is enough.

2. Slow in the ring - I've seen bunch of squash matches in my life and most of them are from giants. I know that Mr. McMahon likes the strong, slow guys over the fast, not so strong wrestlers. Tensai is push 400 pounds, so that makes him slow. His first match was against Riley, and I felt like I found some spots where Tensai could've picked the pace up... the entire match. I can't say much about Ryback, since he barely moves to the ring, but what I've seen from him isn't that impressive. Clay is slow, as well. I get it, he's a big guy and he can't help it, but take a look at Umaga. He was like 400 pounds, but was a quick paced superstar for his weight. I just think they need to start picking the pace up.

3. Gimmicks - Their gimmicks are also very boring, but Clay's is the best. Oh, someone shoot me, I actually said Clay's gimmick is good. Tensai's gimmick is horrible, WWE is making him look like he's actually Japanese. His name's Albert for crying out loud! Ryback's gimmick is just to demolish everyone in his path... b_ring! Can someone give me an O?

Well, thanks for reading this blog. I'm sorry if this is bad, but this is my first blog so don't hate! Please leave your comments I will put it in my head for future's notice.

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Comments

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  1. dashkatae's Avatar
    My problem with squash matches is that they tend not to show any skills what so ever. That's why they're called squash matches. You might as well just have them come out and wrestle a doll cause that's what it is. I miss the older days when there were things called matches for new wrestlers.
    Even though I can't stand John Cena, I still remember his first match and it was with Kurt Angle. What better way to get over with the crowd then to come out against one of the best in the business and show what you can do. Even though Cena lost the match, it still showed what he was capable of.

    Now granted the three big guys are slow in the ring, but so are guys like Big Show and Kane. You don't have to be fast to be exciting, but when you're in a squash match with just jobbers, it doesn't give you much room to do anything other then just obliterate the competition.

    The gimmicks are ok, but they need work. I've always said that when Albert came back, he should of cut a promo about how when he was in the WWE before, he never got anywhere, that he never got his shot, blah blah blah. He left for Japan nd was accepted fully in Japanese society and whatnot and now has decided to come back to show the world he is a threat, that Albert is dead and long live Lord Tensai. Doing something like that would make for a much more dynamic character.
    Ryback should have a mouthpiece for him. Fuckasaurus is there to have fun so I don't have any problems with that gimmick, just wish he could dance better.
  2. Dubs's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by dashkatae
    My problem with squash matches is that they tend not to show any skills what so ever. That's why they're called squash matches. You might as well just have them come out and wrestle a doll cause that's what it is. I miss the older days when there were things called matches for new wrestlers.
    Even though I can't stand John Cena, I still remember his first match and it was with Kurt Angle. What better way to get over with the crowd then to come out against one of the best in the business and show what you can do. Even though Cena lost the match, it still showed what he was capable of.
    I agree that squash matches don't show off pure skill that much but like I said before, it builds the new wrestlers as forces to be reckon with. Casual fans love seeing wrestlers dominate the competition so that's why squash matches are still used today. Though, WWE overdoes it with the squash matches.

    Now granted the three big guys are slow in the ring, but so are guys like Big Show and Kane. You don't have to be fast to be exciting, but when you're in a squash match with just jobbers, it doesn't give you much room to do anything other then just obliterate the competition.
    Exactly. Not everyone is a Kofi or a Mysterio in the ring, nor should they be.

    The gimmicks are ok, but they need work. I've always said that when Albert came back, he should of cut a promo about how when he was in the WWE before, he never got anywhere, that he never got his shot, blah blah blah. He left for Japan nd was accepted fully in Japanese society and whatnot and now has decided to come back to show the world he is a threat, that Albert is dead and long live Lord Tensai. Doing something like that would make for a much more dynamic character.
    Ryback should have a mouthpiece for him. Fuckasaurus is there to have fun so I don't have any problems with that gimmick, just wish he could dance better.
    Hit the nail on the head with this one man.
  3. ComingToCinemas's Avatar
    I don't particularly like squash matches either, but they are used to familiarise the fans with the signature moves of guys whilst giving them an air of dominance. For all three it is essential, and they all have a gimmick we haven't seen in a while.

    I will say that I preferred Albert as the A-Train, I just thought it was a cool name and he was dominant to an extent. I've liked Clay's gimmick since week two (it's all about the music), and Ryback is someone who I can eventually see as a World Heavyweight Champion (the title is a mere formality so they don't have to retire the Big Gold Belt these days, but it gives superstars the push to real major championship) - his only flaw is his Goldberg-ness lol.
  4. Lucas Chapel's Avatar
    Tensai and Ryback are 2 of my favourites atm.
  5. ToiletBowl's Avatar
    The WWE is deliberately trying to recreate the old "jobber" type matches with Ryback. Vince has stated on numerous occasions that he feels Ryan Reeves can be a #1 or #2 face in the company. This is VERY similar to the way Goldberg was brought up. I think the WWE is trying to do the same thing. Let him win 1 minute matches, eventually letting him squash mid card guys then creating that sense of a bulldozer by the time he gets to the upper mid card / main event level.

    No issues with Clay. He's been over since he re-debuted with this new gimmick. It came out of left field and has thus far been a big success.

    As for Albert / Tensai... incredibly failed. If they wanted to do something like this, you show the actual transformation. Much like the WWF did back when they turned One Man Gang into Akeem. Everyone bought it and Akeem didn't ruin the One Man Gang reputation at all. Doing it this way with Albert is a joke. He will never be taken seriously by the audience, no matter how much they try to shove him down our throats. When it's all said and done, he's finally shaved his back.
  6. ToiletBowl's Avatar
    You kids are also spoiled... back in my day, you'd have 4 or 5 matches on a show where all but one of the matches was a jobber match. The one main event match might feature two mid card or upper mid card guys and that was it. Some of my favorite memories of the early days of RAW were watching the Quebecers completely destory jobber tag teams. Some funny shit and watching Pierre literally squash those jobbers was gold.
  7. TheLegendaryIcon's Avatar
    They need to have Albert cut that promo about not being taken seriously and not getting his chance seven years ago. Go on about how we went to Japan and decimated awaiting the day he would return and do the same to everyone in the back.

    Ryback needs to shut up and get a mouthpiece, simple as that. Yelling "Finish him" is annoying at best. The Goldberg comparisons are WAY off. Goldberg would come out with the "dragon breath" in plain black pads and trunks; spear, jackhammer, pin you and call it a day. He did that something like 173 times over and ya know what? It was actually entertaining as shit the first 70-90 times he did this and it started with Hugh Morris... No jobber build-up. I'm sorry, pounding jobbers only really makes you look weak. Beating on somebody legit will put you over. Look at what Nexus did for Barret by beating the crap out of Cena.

    That said, Albert this run is actually something closer to Goldberg than Ryback will ever be at this point.

    As a side note, I know WWE is trying to push "finish him" as a catch phrase and planning to launch merch with it. It's too obvious. The "Who's Next?" of Goldberg fame came out of natural language from a mixture of the fans and being spoken by the commentators. This is the same thing they've been doing with Daniel Bryan and the whole thing turns my stomach because it's like watching a guy sit there and try to invent a meme and push it on people... You don't invent memes, they just happen.

    And yes, one of the weakest points of WWE is the slower paces of their matches. That's why I liked TNA before Hogan and the four sided ring. The matches were a blazing pace, attention grabbing, and even exciting. It was working for them and then Hogan shat on it for no legitimate reason other than he prefers the standard four sided ring. But back to the slowness of WWE, it's sad when you can have a 10 minute match where it's no better than a 2 minute match because you're just repeating the same formula and filling with rest holds and ring outs.

    On to Clay though... I think his gimmick works for him and against him. It works for him because it puts him over with the fans, it's made him an instant face in the company. It works against him because it'll now be very difficult to turn him heel at any point without losing numbers on him. Additionally, he'd have to work his ass off after this to be taken at all seriously as a heel. As such, his character is kind of trapped in a single dimension of being.
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