WWE: Nightmares of Wrestlemania
by, 03-27-2012 at 10:41 PM (4203 Views)
Once again, I'm back with another let's look at a different perspective blog. This time, with Wrestlemania in full swing, it's only natural to stick with the cliched theme. As always I'll be a bit different and point out many "nightmarish" scenarios that could happen at Wrestlemania XXVIII.
Michael Cole will Wrestle
Just a few lines in and you're already scared and probably a bit pissed off. Let's face it, Michael Cole has a nack for being in the wrong place at the right time to generate Massive Heat. Team Johnny vs Team Teddy? Yeah, it seems like a no-brainer now that it's been put out there. With Booker T in the match already and Michael Cole already noted as the "Official Commentator of Team Johnny". If he's not wrestling directly, he'll likely interfere physically.
Nightmare Tier: Mason Ryan cutting a Promo Scary
Cody Rhodes will "Big Show" at Wrestlemania
Job, I mean Job at Wrestlemania. It's a nightmare only in the sense that no one (in the IWC) is going to like the idea of the Big Show defeating Cody Rhodes for the IC Championship. Rhodes has been on fire in his promos and his "Big Show as a Verb" Promo might be one of my favorite from a non-main eventer in a long long time. However, Rhodes has already had his WM moment against a main event talent (Mysterio) last year, and he needs to drop the dead weight that is the IC title. He'll get KO'ed by the Big Show, giving Show a reward for his hard work (and his WHC bitchslap) and a opening a door for Rhodes to enter the main event post WWE Draft.
Nightmare Tier: Kelly Kelly doing a traditional wrestling move Scary
The "End of an Era" match might suck
HHH is 42, Undertaker is 47. The Undertaker has wrestled less than 10 matches in 2 years, HHH just a few more... High Expectations, High Chances for disappointment via Shawn Michaels' reffing, Taker has nearly broken his own neck the past 3 Wrestlemania's... Hell in a Cells are either great or complete crap... I'll admit, I think the match is going to be great, but I think everyone has a little thing in the back of their head going: "If everything doesn't fall right, it'll bomb because of the high expectations." I think most people are assuming the WWE will botch Rock vs Cena, but the Taker/HHH 3 match.... I don't think enough people will think about it until it's too late.
Nightmare Tier: XFL
The Streak continues...
The keyword there is continues, not snapped or finished, but continues. Nothing short of John Cena or Randy Orton would make a Streak Match at Wrestlemania 29 even remotely interesting, and I'll admit, I'm not even sure if I'd care about a Cena/Taker or Orton/Taker match simply because The Undertaker is absolutely worthless Jan-March for main event promos beyond talking. Which I think everyone can agree.... we're all sick of right now. Combine HHH/Taker, HHH/HBK, HBK/Taker, Cena/Rock... and I think I could fill the 4hr PPV with just recordings of their non-physical promos.
I hope the Streak is finished (not snapped) at WM 28 or at the very least, is toned way down next year from importance unless The Undertaker returns as a near full-time main roster superstar. Exception: Kane vs Taker III would be acceptable under the right buildup and ended both stars.
Nightmare Tier: Unknown
The King of Kings leaves a Sour Taste
I'll make this one quick, if you're a John Cena hater this will be easy -- imagine Cena winning the WWE championship and cutting a stereotypical "The Champ is Here" promo in complete PG form. Now paste that onto King "I used to never job" HHH and we're all left with a "ugh, what's left to do now?" feeling that would only be shaken under the right circumstance.
Nightmare Tier: The Nightmare is Here
Rise above Twitter's Champion
John Cena defeats The Rock.
I could add a thousand little astricks to that line, but it won't matter any more than it would to Barry Bonds' Home Run Record. It would be there, and it wouldn't go away. I'm going on record that Cena is going to defeat The Rock unless Rock vs Cena is planned out to be a series of matches. This is simply based on the idea that you don't bury a "Champion" with a guy who's not staying.
Recent Examples: Morrision vs Ziggler, Batista vs Cena.
Old School Example: Montreal Screwjob
John Cena's legacy would be tainted for years if the Rock never returned for a rematch, no matter how it's spun, the WWE will have already made it's money by the time the match starts, they wouldn't risk future earnings by having their main star lose to a visitor unless a rematch is planned.
Nightmare Tier: Depending on POV -- Katie Vick or Shawn Michaels wins WWF Championship at WM12
Likelihood: Coin Flip
I had some other ideas, but these will do for now...