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Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 09:10 PM
http://agripinoynet.cebuhostingampit.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/banana.jpg

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_Dwex9AQ8IuA/SfXevUWCioI/AAAAAAAAFR4/BbF2eTUvDRk/s400/MANGO-ginger-banana-smoothie-400-1.jpg

This thread will be weekly, one-stop shopping for all of the silly, asinine things we want to get out regarding WWE's flagship shows.

RULES:
- Keep things loose
- Keep things fun
but most importantly
- No excessive punctuation and/or uncomfortable, shirtless Glamour-Shots

oh, yeah
- If you have alcohol, be sure to share

__________________________________________________ _____________________________

First thoughts coming up...

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 09:27 PM
- "Changing the landscape" doesn't mean what Triple H seems to think it means.

- Am I the only one who got kind of excited when Trips started hyping the Summerslam main event's special referee only to be completely devastated when he revealed it was going to be him? My girlfriend could literally here my eyes rolling from the other room. For a second there I actually thought he was going to say The Rock, or even Kevin Nash, but then I got smacked in the face with the Haitch's nose-sized realization that the next several months are going to consist of him shoving himself down our throats. Why some people have yet to tire of his shtick, I have no clue.

- R-Truth's promos are like The Wicker Man for the wrestling set. I love it.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyigAW-14w0

- Someone needs to fire off an e-mail off to WWE's music division informing them that their idea of what constitutes relevant rock music is about a decade behind the times.

- I actually feel sorry for Jack Swagger. It's like watching an amputee bike courier try to deliver a package.

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 09:46 PM
Ouch. Even with Melina being gone, it doesn't look like there's much hope for JoMo.

WWTNA Mark
08-08-2011, 09:54 PM
Ouch. Even with Melina being gone, it doesn't look like there's much hope for JoMo.

I know what you mean. Dude just got "squashed" by Truth.

helmsley
08-08-2011, 09:56 PM
http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/This-Thread-Delivers/1/ike_where_this_thread_is_going-vi.jpg (http://www.funnyforumpics.com)

Bodom
08-08-2011, 10:04 PM
Hearing Cena say "Five Moves of Doom" made my night.

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:10 PM
Hearing Cena say "Five Moves of Doom" made my night.
The whole back-and-forth between him and Punk has been all kinds of excellent. Almost made up completely for the fact that the rest of the show was nothing but underwhelming.

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:13 PM
I know what you mean. Dude just got "squashed" by Truth.
JoMo's entire time since returning has been spent on his back, which runs a nice parallel with how his significant other is likely spending her time now that she finds her schedule suddenly open.

Bodom
08-08-2011, 10:13 PM
The whole back-and-forth between him and Punk has been all kinds of excellent. Almost made up completely for the fact that the rest of the show was nothing but underwhelming.

Take away the Punk segments and this Raw was all sorts of suck.

WWTNA Mark
08-08-2011, 10:15 PM
JoMo's entire time since returning has been spent on his back, which runs a nice parallel with how his significant other is likely spending her time now that she finds her schedule suddenly open.

I freaking lol'd at this!

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:17 PM
Haha. I just realized that John Laurinaitis' doppleganger is Marty Funkhouser from Curb Your Enthusiasm. Behold:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o5m_mXadoU&feature=player_detailpage

VanHooliganX
08-08-2011, 10:19 PM
The whole back-and-forth between him and Punk has been all kinds of excellent. Almost made up completely for the fact that the rest of the show was nothing but underwhelming.

So true. The Ziggler segment was pointless. Punk, Miz and Truth are making monday nights very fun

dres1214
08-08-2011, 10:20 PM
This thread is AWESOME!

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:22 PM
Take away the Punk segments and this Raw was all sorts of suck.
Yeah, it wasn't good. If Phil weren't around to be pulling drive-bys with his words, I think I'd probably be watching No Reservations instead (the travel show, not the romantic comedy).

WWTNA Mark
08-08-2011, 10:22 PM
I can't just give ALL the credit to Punk for making this storyline interesting. Everyone is playing their roles well in this storyline, not just Punk.

Bodom
08-08-2011, 10:25 PM
I can't just give ALL the credit to Punk for making this storyline interesting. Everyone is playing their roles well in this storyline, not just Punk.

Cena taking things serious is always a good thing.

HHH burying the entire company in the first 5 minutes of Raw was ridiculous.

WWTNA Mark
08-08-2011, 10:26 PM
Cena taking things serious is always a good thing.

HHH burying the entire company in the first 5 minutes of Raw was ridiculous.

Yeah, that was pretty ridiculous.

Ruthless_Aggression
08-08-2011, 10:28 PM
At least CM Punk is calling all the BS that the 'E has been doing. Loved the mention of Koslov, Smith, and Masters. Wonder why he didn't mention Melina or Gail Kim though...

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:38 PM
At least CM Punk is calling all the BS that the 'E has been doing. Loved the mention of Koslov, Smith, and Masters. Wonder why he didn't mention Melina or Gail Kim though...
I don't think it was really necessary to name check everybody. The few mentions he made were probably adequate enough.

Bodom
08-08-2011, 10:39 PM
At least CM Punk is calling all the BS that the 'E has been doing. Loved the mention of Koslov, Smith, and Masters. Wonder why he didn't mention Melina or Gail Kim though...

Hell Punk was calling out the BS within minutes of said BS.

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:45 PM
I like The Rock as much as the next guy, but he really needs to get some new material on that teleprompter of his.

FaceOfSpades
08-08-2011, 10:58 PM
Cena taking things serious is always a good thing.

HHH burying the entire company in the first 5 minutes of Raw was ridiculous.

I thought he was going heel for a second...maybe?

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 10:58 PM
So true. The Ziggler segment was pointless. Punk, Miz and Truth are making monday nights very fun
Man, that kid is one of the most talented people on the entire roster. It's a real shame with the kind of crap he keeps getting served on his plate.

FaceOfSpades
08-08-2011, 10:59 PM
I like The Rock as much as the next guy, but he really needs to get some new material on that teleprompter of his.

The rocks my all time fav but I agree. At the same time, the 6th and 7th graders resent that comment.

Bodom
08-08-2011, 11:00 PM
Man, that kid is one of the most talented people on the entire roster. It's a real shame with the kind of crap he keeps getting served on his plate.

He needs to get away from Vickie stat.

Also. Whoever writes for Riley needs to be shot.

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 11:01 PM
I thought he was going heel for a second...maybe?
I have a really hard time discerning what he's supposed to be, exactly. I mean, is he supposed to be a face right now or what? If so, he's awfully unlikable.

Fan4Now
08-08-2011, 11:02 PM
Ape I value your opinion on most subjects. Just wanna say I agree with alot of this ESPECIALLY the HHH comment. It wasn't forever ago that I created a thread that if HHH took over he would utilize every big spot for himself & do not much better than VKM'sw been doing for yrs. excluding PUNK lately. Of course you got on me about it as did others WHICH IS FINE!! Now if HHH really has control or not IDK. I don't go by X- Pac's tweet. I think VKM still has control but if HHH really takes over one day I foresee WWE really being full of shit (HIM). I'll still value your opinions & laugh at your clever quirks after this but you & anyone else feel free to bash me for this. He's been on RAW & SD non stop since his phony/scripted taking of the throne. You say he's forcing himself down our throat. I'm just agreeing with you & adding an extension.

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 11:02 PM
The rocks my all time fav but I agree. At the same time, the 6th and 7th graders resent that comment.
"Quick, he's doing the kid voice again! If that isn't deserving of a main event slot at Wrestlemania, I don't know what is!"

Iron Ape
08-08-2011, 11:17 PM
Ape I value your opinion on most subjects. Just wanna say I agree with alot of this ESPECIALLY the HHH comment. It wasn't forever ago that I created a thread that if HHH took over he would utilize every big spot for himself & do not much better than VKM'sw been doing for yrs. excluding PUNK lately. Of course you got on me about it as did others WHICH IS FINE!! Now if HHH really has control or not IDK. I don't go by X- Pac's tweet. I think VKM still has control but if HHH really takes over one day I foresee WWE really being full of shit (HIM). I'll still value your opinions & laugh at your clever quirks after this but you & anyone else feel free to bash me for this. He's been on RAW & SD non stop since his phony/scripted taking of the throne. You say he's forcing himself down our throat. I'm just agreeing with you & adding an extension.

Let me just say, I don't believe Trips is actually in control of the show. To my knowledge, he's still training on the job and will be for some time. Does he have major influence? Oh, I'm sure of it. But do I think he's 100% responsible for what's happening at the moment? I sure as hell hope not. If so, though, God help us all.

clh2285
08-09-2011, 12:05 AM
Fuck this thread



































































http://originalthinkingman.tripod.com/just_kidding.jpg

tshizzy34
08-09-2011, 12:06 AM
He needs to get away from Vickie stat.

Also. Whoever writes for Riley needs to be shot.

I agree and it seems like after tonight that he maybe moving towards leaving her soon if he hasn't already. And yea Riley's shit tonight was bad...ruuul bad lol

StraightEDGeSavior
08-09-2011, 12:16 AM
big fan of the thread ape haha. Of course as a fan we all wanted to mark out at the beginning of raw when we all wondered if the ref could be FOLEY, or te Rock, of shit even stonecold, but HHH revieled he was guest referee...and I thought to myself, "just when i thought the sumerslam ppv buys were gonna shoot up to the roof, it is dulled by the new 'COO'." But it got me thinkin...you know he is about to do a full heel turn and screw somebody over (which hasn't happend for a while. Form a new corporation heel click ?with nash/Waltman etc?)...

- As for the rest of the raw, punk's words are becoming more real and real each week on raw IMO. may the "reality era" begin.

- Laughed my ass off when punk said "my movie went straight to DVD too wish he'd be a little more physicaly badass tho like stone cold such as smash Del Rios car with a bat on his way to the ring, or GTS someone outta nowhere.

-P.S. WWE is better off writing their scripts through these threads. With all the talent and potential on BOTH rosters you're pushing fucking A-RY? A lamer, less experienced version of the MIZ? I mean morrison blows on the mic but christ no1 wants to see ARY tackle and botch DDT his way to victory!

Mtt08 xXx
08-09-2011, 12:19 AM
big fan of the thread ape haha. Of course as a fan we all wanted to mark out at the beginning of raw when we all wondered if the ref could be FOLEY, or te Rock, of shit even stonecold, but HHH revieled he was guest referee...and I thought to myself, "just when i thought the sumerslam ppv buys were gonna shoot up to the roof, it is dulled by the new 'COO'." But it got me thinkin...you know he is about to do a full heel turn and screw somebody over (which hasn't happend for a while. Form a new corporation heel click ?with nash/Waltman etc?)...

- As for the rest of the raw, punk's words are becoming more real and real each week on raw IMO. may the "reality era" begin.

- Laughed my ass off when punk said "my movie went straight to DVD too wish he'd be a little more physicaly badass tho like stone cold such as smash Del Rios car with a bat on his way to the ring, or GTS someone outta nowhere.

-P.S. WWE is better off writing their scripts through these threads. With all the talent and potential on BOTH rosters you're pushing fucking A-RY? A lamer, less experienced version of the MIZ? I mean morrison blows on the mic but christ no1 wants to see ARY tackle and botch DDT his way to victory!


i agreed with you until the ARY hate. i actually like the dude. his writing is just horrible

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 12:20 AM
Yeah, now that jokes about Vickie's weight are off the table, people are really going to be scraping the bottom of the insult barrel. I mean, bad breath jokes? Is their next encounter going to involve A-Ri encouraging her to switch her brand of sanitary napkin?

StraightEDGeSavior
08-09-2011, 12:23 AM
I mean hes got the look and the charisma, but ANOTHER tanned ripped guy in a speedo with a stupid haircut, no gimmick, and no unique wrestling moves? I mean i cant stand kofi kingston but at least he does some tight shit. We know no1 is beating ziggler for now so why not give the fans something to cheer about like...a shooting star press from bourne? or even Ryder

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 12:26 AM
big fan of the thread ape haha. Of course as a fan we all wanted to mark out at the beginning of raw when we all wondered if the ref could be FOLEY, or te Rock, of shit even stonecold, but HHH revieled he was guest referee...and I thought to myself, "just when i thought the sumerslam ppv buys were gonna shoot up to the roof, it is dulled by the new 'COO'." But it got me thinkin...you know he is about to do a full heel turn and screw somebody over (which hasn't happend for a while. Form a new corporation heel click ?with nash/Waltman etc?)...

See, while I'm not really trying to see Nash back as a full-time in-ring competitor, I think he would have been a great choice to serve as Hunter's special referee/enforcer/corporate stooge or whatever. Just imagine Nash and Punk taking turns shooting on one another. Loads and loads of potential there.

Besides, what's the point of keeping a guy around and giving him money if you aren't going to use him? The guy wants to be out there, so why not? I sincerely hope that something develops on that front.

WPack911
08-09-2011, 12:32 AM
I agree and it seems like after tonight that he maybe moving towards leaving her soon if he hasn't already. And yea Riley's shit tonight was bad...ruuul bad lol

Whenever someone resorts to poop jokes I call that "John Cena Bad" or a "John Cena Special". :)

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 12:35 AM
Is it just me, or does Del Rio have the lamest tattoos in all of wrestling? I thought Big Show's were bad, but Alberto just might have him beat.

CM_Jericho
08-09-2011, 12:35 AM
Cena used the words "heel persona" lolz

WPack911
08-09-2011, 12:46 AM
big fan of the thread ape haha. Of course as a fan we all wanted to mark out at the beginning of raw when we all wondered if the ref could be FOLEY, or te Rock, of shit even stonecold, but HHH revieled he was guest referee...and I thought to myself, "just when i thought the sumerslam ppv buys were gonna shoot up to the roof, it is dulled by the new 'COO'." But it got me thinkin...you know he is about to do a full heel turn and screw somebody over (which hasn't happend for a while. Form a new corporation heel click ?with nash/Waltman etc?)...

- As for the rest of the raw, punk's words are becoming more real and real each week on raw IMO. may the "reality era" begin.

- Laughed my ass off when punk said "my movie went straight to DVD too wish he'd be a little more physicaly badass tho like stone cold such as smash Del Rios car with a bat on his way to the ring, or GTS someone outta nowhere.

-P.S. WWE is better off writing their scripts through these threads. With all the talent and potential on BOTH rosters you're pushing fucking A-RY? A lamer, less experienced version of the MIZ? I mean morrison blows on the mic but christ no1 wants to see ARY tackle and botch DDT his way to victory!

I am with you man, even on the A-Ry stuff. I don't really get why people like this guy, he is not that great on the mic, solid in ring but not amazing. Like you said he is poor mans Miz whom I think has way more personality, mic skills and wrestling ability, so why do you need A-Ry again?

I hope Ziggler drops Vicky, gets a new pissed off "beat down his opponent to make a name for himself alone" mentality and destroys A-Ry.

TheDevilsAdvocate
08-09-2011, 01:08 AM
I like how they tried to push the "Divas" division into a positive path, but they released two of the most talented Diva's they had on the roster that could have leveled perfectly against Natalya, and Beth Phoenix. I see this failing in so many ways. I give the WWE writers a month before they give up on this angle.

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 01:35 AM
I like how they tried to push the "Divas" division into a positive path, but they released two of the most talented Diva's they had on the roster that could have leveled perfectly against Natalya, and Beth Phoenix. I see this failing in so many ways. I give the WWE writers a month before they give up on this angle.
Yeah, this is pretty funny/sad, though I can totally understand why they would cut someone like Melina. That chick might have been somewhat talented in the ring, but all of that gets undermined by her completely toxic personality.

I picture Melina spending her new found free time creating fake Facebook accounts to trash Mickie James' musical efforts, prank calling Batista's gym, and surrounding herself with lots of cats. Also, I bet she's going to learn how to bake cakes in the shape of penises.

TheDevilsAdvocate
08-09-2011, 02:04 AM
Yeah, this is pretty funny/sad, though I can totally understand why they would cut someone like Melina. That chick might have been somewhat talented in the ring, but all of that gets undermined by her completely toxic personality.

I picture Melina spending her new found free time creating fake Facebook accounts to trash Mickie James' musical efforts, prank calling Batista's gym, and surrounding herself with lots of cats. Also, I bet she's going to learn how to bake cakes in the shape of penises.

Oh you are on a roll Tonight, Ape. I was aware of why she may have been released from her contract. It is still sad though. All they really had to do was use her an she would have shut her whore mouth. It seems that she is only content when they put her in matches consistently while treating the Diva's Division with some value. She went on a limb for years now to say that the division has not changed, and that they could deliver just like Trish, Molly, Lita, Ivory, Victoria, and the rest did. I mean if they had more time performing I am sure that they would probably be far better as Wrestlers.

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 02:15 AM
Oh you are on a roll Tonight, Ape. I was aware of why she may have been released from her contract. It is still sad though. All they really had to do was use her an she would have shut her whore mouth. It seems that she is only content when they put her in matches consistently while treating the Diva's Division with some value. She went on a limb for years now to say that the division has not changed, and that they could deliver just like Trish, Molly, Lita, Ivory, Victoria, and the rest did. I mean if they had more time performing I am sure that they would probably be far better as Wrestlers.
Hahahaha.

Do you have any idea what happens with the ladies at house shows? I would think that those shows would be a perfect opportunity for them to hone their craft some. I went to one back in 2002, but I seriously cannot for the life of me remember if any of the Divas even had a match, much less given the opportunity to put on one longer than what's often seen on television.

*makes a note to ease back on the ganja*

TheDevilsAdvocate
08-09-2011, 02:26 AM
Hahahaha.

Do you have any idea what happens with the ladies at house shows? I would think that those shows would be a perfect opportunity for them to hone their craft some. I went to one back in 2002, but I seriously cannot for the life of me remember if any of the Divas even had a match, much less given the opportunity to put on one longer than what's often seen on television.

*makes a note to ease back on the ganja*

Well I doubt nobody will stand up for them again. Gail Kim an Melina had crazy rants about how disappointed they were with the time the Diva's had been given. Guess what happened to them? They are both gone from the WWE. I am happy as long as they still have Natalya an Beth Phoenix. Maryse was pretty decent, but she's out with something right now, and they haven't used her individually since her Ms. Mary Poppins came out to say "Hello" during the match.

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 02:33 AM
Well I doubt nobody will stand up for them again. Gail Kim an Melina had crazy rants about how disappointed they were with the time the Diva's had been given. Guess what happened to them? They are both gone from the WWE. I am happy as long as they still have Natalya an Beth Phoenix. Maryse was pretty decent, but she's out with something right now, and they haven't used her individually since her Ms. Mary Poppins came out to say "Hello" during the match.
Yeah, Maryse had some serious momentum going there for awhile. I wonder why they ever put the kibosh on that and decided to saddle her with the eternally bland Ted Jr..

TheDevilsAdvocate
08-09-2011, 02:41 AM
Yeah, Maryse had some serious momentum going there for awhile. I wonder why they ever put the kibosh on that and decided to saddle her with the eternally bland Ted Jr..

Because being a Dibiase.. The WWE desperately wanted to bring some character to him. Maryse sacrificed her main event (yes believe it or not) quality to be Teds lackey. Now he is bringing down Cody Rhodes. He's like the reversed gimmick that Randy Orton had. He's "The Future Killer". He doesn't even have to lift a finger. That lazy bastard.

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 03:29 AM
Because being a Dibiase.. The WWE desperately wanted to bring some character to him. Maryse sacrificed her main event (yes believe it or not) quality to be Teds lackey. Now he is bringing down Cody Rhodes. He's like the reversed gimmick that Randy Orton had. He's "The Future Killer". He doesn't even have to lift a finger. That lazy bastard.
Okay, this is spot on. And hilarious.

*golf claps*

steveorton
08-09-2011, 07:28 AM
Ouch. Even with Melina being gone, it doesn't look like there's much hope for JoMo.

Gotta to agree with this, I was a fan of the guy but lately I don't know, he has to be able to play politics he look like he has no clue when it comes to this, I'm jus sayin...

steveorton
08-09-2011, 07:29 AM
Because being a Dibiase.. The WWE desperately wanted to bring some character to him. Maryse sacrificed her main event (yes believe it or not) quality to be Teds lackey. Now he is bringing down Cody Rhodes. He's like the reversed gimmick that Randy Orton had. He's "The Future Killer". He doesn't even have to lift a finger. That lazy bastard.

^^^^^Quoted for the truth, I'm jus sayin...

Stihltygre
08-09-2011, 07:56 AM
i'm going with the theory that the whole reason for the Beth Natalya heel turn is to use them as in ring educators to improve the other diva's. gail kim asked for her release so they won't use her, and Melina had a toxic personality. throwing two of the mopst talented women in wrestling into a high profile heel persona gives them time to mentor the less "skilled" Divas.

Rich Cranium
08-09-2011, 10:58 AM
It's amazing at what Punk is allowed to say on the air. I don't even know if I can remember future endeavored employees being named on the air like that. It's awesome as well as fresh!

FaceOfSpades
08-09-2011, 11:59 AM
It's amazing at what Punk is allowed to say on the air. I don't even know if I can remember future endeavored employees being named on the air like that. It's awesome as well as fresh!

Ric flair was the only one "the unemployment line like ur buddy scott hall" after stone cold squashed em.

spidercentz
08-09-2011, 12:20 PM
Has anyone noticed that the "Internet Wrestling Community" has the same 10 guys on it complaining about everything? I'm sorry but 10 people is not a community.

And as for Punk and Cena. I am a big fan of BOTH of them.

helmsley
08-09-2011, 01:44 PM
............................................

helmsley
08-09-2011, 01:46 PM
Has anyone noticed that the "Internet Wrestling Community" has the same 10 guys on it complaining about everything? I'm sorry but 10 people is not a community.

And as for Punk and Cena. I am a big fan of BOTH of them.

http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/STFU/1/STFU_newbie.jpg (http://www.funnyforumpics.com)


stop bitchin :)

WWTNA Mark
08-09-2011, 01:47 PM
It's amazing at what Punk is allowed to say on the air. I don't even know if I can remember future endeavored employees being named on the air like that. It's awesome as well as fresh!

We are living in the Reality Era now. CM Punk is the leader of the new era.

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 05:26 PM
Is everyone going to get to shoot during this so-called "reality era", or is this something that's just going to be exclusive to Haitch, Phil, and Cena?

Bodom
08-09-2011, 05:38 PM
Is everyone going to get to shoot during this so-called "reality era", or is this something that's just going to be exclusive to Haitch, Phil, and Cena?

I'd do anything to hear Yoshi Tatsu shoot on the entire company.

Iron Ape
08-09-2011, 08:46 PM
I'd do anything to hear Yoshi Tatsu shoot on the entire company.
Haha. I'd definitely throw in a couple of duckets to help make that happen.

Rich Cranium
08-09-2011, 08:49 PM
Is everyone going to get to shoot during this so-called "reality era", or is this something that's just going to be exclusive to Haitch, Phil, and Cena?

IDK, when Beth mentioned no more splits, we all knew who she was referring to.

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 08:25 PM
- Years from now, when they inevitably release a DVD of Del Rio wearing scarfs and talking about destiny, the footage should consist primarily of him making crazy faces. Like, the DVD should have an entire chapter dedicated to the many impressions of geckos that he does.

- Did the world really need to be reminded that "What's Up?!?" actually exists?

- I've got my fingers crossed that Nash and Punk trade barbs tonight.

Bodom
08-15-2011, 08:30 PM
More people hate R-Truth than will ever even care about Morrison..

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 08:31 PM
Wow. They actually threw Morrison a bone.

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 08:39 PM
"Subway sucks! Subway sucks!"

Hahahaha.

RomanFlare
08-15-2011, 08:43 PM
"Subway sucks! Subway sucks!"

Hahahaha.

I thought I was Truth-crazy--no one else mentioned it in chat.

Also--The Miz might be the best spokesman in the world after that. I really want that sandwich.

SESAfro
08-15-2011, 08:51 PM
Subway is a lie. $5 foot longs, my ass.

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 08:52 PM
The Bellas make grunting noises similar to that of mating porpoises. It confuses my penis more than their faces do.

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 09:06 PM
Holy shit. That text from Punk's little sister is the greatest thing of all the things.

Fuck. This whole segment is money.

No_1eddiefan
08-15-2011, 09:19 PM
Holy shit. That text from Punk's little sister is the greatest thing of all the things.

Fuck. This whole segment is money.

Had to sig the text haha, made me actually LOL for quite a while.

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 09:23 PM
Had to sig the text haha, made me actually LOL for quite a while.
They should totally release a Kevin Nash shirt with Punk's little sister texting that shit on it.

No_1eddiefan
08-15-2011, 09:33 PM
They should totally release a Kevin Nash shirt with Punk's little sister texting that shit on it.

I'd buy that shirt the day it came out!

Iron Ape
08-15-2011, 09:38 PM
Hahahahahaha. McGillicutty is so urban now.

Grind_Bastard
08-15-2011, 10:12 PM
I'd buy that shirt the day it came out!

2 T-shirts sold then, LOL. Most epic text ever.

Androo
08-15-2011, 10:26 PM
Hahahahahaha. McGillicutty is so urban now.

"Backwards facing baseball cap: so many new dimensions to my character!!" McGillicutty is SO hip right now!

Iron Ape
08-22-2011, 08:21 PM
First thoughts for the night:

- I seriously don't think the opening quarter of RAW has been worth a damn since Miz and Morrison met up for the title.

- Man, Del Rio has charisma to spare. Unfortunately, though, he's doesn't seem to ever have anything interesting to say. I honestly think I would rather him always speak in Spanish so I'd have no clue as to whether he's boring me or not.

- Canadian crowds are awesome.

Iron Ape
08-22-2011, 09:15 PM
- That Just For Men ad placement right after the backstage segment with Trips and Nash was seven kinds of brilliant.

- McGillitunga is the worst. Just the worst.

Iron Ape
08-22-2011, 09:22 PM
- McGillitunga is the worst. Just the worst.
Thank Jebus that's over.

No_1eddiefan
08-22-2011, 09:32 PM
I have mixed feelings about Kofi & Bourne being champions.

Positive- Evan Bourne is a champion! Way too overdue.

Negative- Another tag team just thrown together.

I just hope they stay as a tag team and the tag division gets sorted.

Iron Ape
08-22-2011, 09:41 PM
I have mixed feelings about Kofi & Bourne being champions.

Positive- Evan Bourne is a champion! Way too overdue.

Negative- Another tag team just thrown together.

I just hope they stay as a tag team and the tag division gets sorted.

I agree with your sentiments regarding just throwing guys together and calling them a tag team. But at least in this case we're getting one really good worker (the amazing tyke that is Evan Bourne) paired up with a guy who some people are convinced is also good (the errant fireworks display that is Coffee Kingston) and not, well, David Otunga (insert guy who bangs a Weight Watcher joke here) and Michael fucking McGillicutty (the worst thing to happen to a microphone since Roseanne Barr belted out a National Anthem).

No_1eddiefan
08-22-2011, 09:45 PM
I agree with your sentiments regarding just throwing guys together and calling them a tag team. But at least in this case we're getting one really good worker (the amazing tyke that is Evan Bourne) paired up with a guy who some people are convinced is also good (the errant fireworks display that is Coffee Kingston) and not, well, David Otunga (insert guy who bangs a Weight Watcher joke here) and Michael fucking McGillicutty (the worst thing to happen to a microphone since Roseanne Barr belted out a National Anthem).

I actually think McGillicutty is very talented, he just needs the chance to prove it.

He needs to drop the McGillicutty name and use his real name- Joe Hennig.

Acknowledge the fact that he is Mr. Perfect's son and enter him into a good feud- singles.

Also, I wanna see Bourne & Kofi vs. Miz & Truth.

Iron Ape
08-22-2011, 09:52 PM
I honestly don't see why it's so important to so many for Mike to rest on the laurels that come with his father's name. I think it would be sort of lazy, to be perfectly honest. Besides, he's the one that wanted to strike out on his own, and I think he should be given the chance (provided that opportunity doesn't involve talking of any sort).

WWTNA Mark
08-22-2011, 09:55 PM
I honestly don't see why it's so important to so many for Mike to rest on the laurels that come with his father's name. I think it would be sort of lazy, to be perfectly honest. Besides, he's the one that wanted to strike out on his own, and I think he should be given the chance (provided that opportunity doesn't involve talking of any sort).

Agreed man.

THEKEVINBRAND
08-22-2011, 10:03 PM
Apparently Kevin Nash had a car accident (or so Laurinaitis says). Authorities report he tore both quads applying the brakes at an intersection.

Iron Ape
08-22-2011, 10:06 PM
So, there's no honor in cashing the Money in the Bank in on a downed champion, but it's perfectly fine to win #1 contendership by hitting your finisher on a distracted opponent? LOL. Yeah, sound logic there, John/writers.

*several thumbs in the air while simultaneously rolling many of eyes*

K2Jelly
08-23-2011, 12:52 AM
So, there's no honor in cashing the Money in the Bank in on a downed champion, but it's perfectly fine to win #1 contendership by hitting your finisher on a distracted opponent? LOL. Yeah, sound logic there, John/writers.

*several thumbs in the air while simultaneously rolling many of eyes*

I was thinking the exact same thing. Cena has been the epitome of a contradiction as of late.

K2Jelly
08-23-2011, 12:54 AM
On another note, I never realized how wrong "Bushwhackers" sounds until Lawler mentioned them during the tag team match.

WWTNA Mark
08-23-2011, 11:48 AM
The Miz and R-Truth should be a good pairing.

helmsley
08-23-2011, 12:07 PM
The Miz and R-Truth should be a good pairing.

yep, but it feels like a step down for the miz, i dont really know why

WWTNA Mark
08-23-2011, 12:09 PM
yep, but it feels like a step down for the miz, i dont really know why

Yeah, for some reason it does but anything to get both Miz and R-Truth air-time I guess. Although I would have liked to see both Miz and R-Truth in separate storylines.

K2Jelly
08-23-2011, 12:29 PM
I think they R-Awesome together.

Necroyeti
08-23-2011, 12:33 PM
I think they R-Awesome together.
http://i.imgur.com/E20Gu.jpg

If you ask me, Kevin Nash coming out and spouting insider smark references in 2011 is embarrassing as fuck

johnnydropkicks
08-23-2011, 06:22 PM
I liked the whole thing but I'm a bit sicked that Miz reduced to Truths hype man.

Iron Ape
08-23-2011, 06:31 PM
I liked the whole thing but I'm a bit sicked that Miz reduced to Truths hype man.
I don't really see it as one propping up the other. The two seemed to work well together, and I think it will be a fun diversion while the majority of the focus is placed on Cena, Punk, and Haitch & friends.

Besides, anything is a step-up over feuding with a guy who hawks shitty sandwiches for a living.

IrkenInvader
08-23-2011, 06:46 PM
I honestly don't see why it's so important to so many for Mike to rest on the laurels that come with his father's name. I think it would be sort of lazy, to be perfectly honest. Besides, he's the one that wanted to strike out on his own, and I think he should be given the chance (provided that opportunity doesn't involve talking of any sort).

I don't care if he uses the name Hennig, I just want him to stop using McStupidName.

Iron Ape
08-23-2011, 07:58 PM
I don't care if he uses the name Hennig, I just want him to stop using McStupidName.
I don't remember- did people have major qualms back when Dreamer's wife was using it?

Seems like a silly thing to get hung up on, regardless.

Bodom
08-23-2011, 08:00 PM
McGillicutty just need's to work on not sucking.

Androo
08-23-2011, 08:05 PM
McGillicutty just need's to work on not sucking.

And preventing backwards facing baseball caps from plonking on his head before every time he comes out.

belleza
08-23-2011, 08:08 PM
Two things - I hate Joe Hennig's ring name. I don't even think my computer will type it - Michael McGi....lli...cu...ajfghuayefguayr

Nope, not working.

Second thing, I love the name of this thread...it's clever :)

Iron Ape
08-23-2011, 08:16 PM
McGillicutty just need's to work on not sucking.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YS8HGR4U9GE&feature=related

Maybe they should have just capitalized on this by giving him the gimmick of worst stick-man ever; after all, people are more interested in looking at car wrecks than things involving Otungas.

Iron Ape
08-23-2011, 08:17 PM
Second thing, I love the name of this thread...it's clever :)
Muchas gracias.

johnnydropkicks
08-23-2011, 08:47 PM
I call him Michael McGillicutie ;)

and I disagree on the promo. that promo just sounds like him putting a bunch of big words together.

Iron Ape
08-23-2011, 08:53 PM
and I disagree on the promo. that promo just sounds like him putting a bunch of big words together.
A bunch? The only word approaching "big" would be genesis, and even that's a bit of a stretch. ;)

SilverGhost
08-28-2011, 12:29 AM
Stuck.....I need entertainment from this.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 07:31 PM
Stuck.....I need entertainment from this.
Oh, hey. I just saw that you stickied this. Cool.

Show starts in a half hour. Hopefully tonight will bring some worthwhile shiz to rap about.

*crosses fingers for Otunga to be repackaged as Mr. FCW, complete with bright green unitard and European man-purse*

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 08:08 PM
- Haitch needs to add something to his entrance, kinda like how Vince had that crazy strut. Maybe instead of spraying water like he used to, he could spit mouthfuls of Starbucks Mocha Frappuccino into the audience (the suit just ain't sellin' the yuppie part enough).

- I don't want to see Smackdown stars on RAW. Sorry, I just don't; it gives me less of an incentive to tune in on Fridays. Also, it gives RAW's lesser-seen guys, well, less of a chance to get their shine on.

- Ah, the return of nWo music. Smart move. Though it does sort of undermine the angle that Nash ain't on the payroll.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 08:12 PM
- Ah, the return of nWo music. Smart move. Though it does sort of undermine the angle that Nash ain't on the payroll.
Makes sense now that he's "got a contract".

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 08:33 PM
Dolph Ziggler >>> Randy Orton


EDIT: Ziggler might very well be the best in-ring performer in all of the WWE right now. I truly believe that.

Bodom
08-29-2011, 08:48 PM
Oh good, they spent months building up Mark Henry so cena can beat him in 5 minutes for no reason

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 08:48 PM
Yeah, that was a good match by raw standards.

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 08:54 PM
John Laurinaitis = super dave osborne 2.0

68wPayne
08-29-2011, 08:54 PM
Johnny Ace and Haitch are arguing about who books a Teddy Long special?

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:00 PM
Oh good, they spent months building up Mark Henry so cena can beat him in 5 minutes for no reason
Why do such an effective job of building someone if you're only going to self-sabotage? They're basically cock-blocking themselves.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:02 PM
John Laurinaitis = super dave osborne 2.0

Yeah, I posted this back on page 2:


Haha. I just realized that John Laurinaitis' doppleganger is Marty Funkhouser from Curb Your Enthusiasm. Behold:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o5m_mXadoU&feature=player_detailpage

Mint Berry Crunch
08-29-2011, 09:06 PM
Why do such an effective job of building someone if you're only going to self-sabotage? They're basically cock-blocking themselves.

Its WWE, what do you expect?

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 09:07 PM
Yeah, I posted this back on page 2:

Hilarious, I missed it.

Eve's Arse No.1
08-29-2011, 09:07 PM
Why do such an effective job of building someone if you're only going to self-sabotage? They're basically cock-blocking themselves.

cos its WWE they do it everytime.




EDIT: Fucking hell im turning into the retarded nephew of a ninja

Androo
08-29-2011, 09:09 PM
I hope no-one missed Cenas HIIIIILARIOUS jokey jokes again tonight! They were quite wonderful!

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:11 PM
I hope no-one missed Cenas HIIIIILARIOUS jokey jokes again tonight! They were quite wonderful!
Tonight's attempts at humor were brought to us by:

http://momminitup.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/cruisers.jpg

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:14 PM
Hilarious, I missed it.
The first time I heard Laurinaitis open his trap, I burst out laughing immediately. The resemblance between him and Super Dave/Marty Funkhouser is uncanny.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:17 PM
Its WWE, what do you expect?
It only takes one visit from the fire department to realize that sticking your dick in a pool suction fitting is not a good idea. So, yeah, I sort of expect that they would learn their lesson.

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 09:23 PM
I wonder if Sin Cara will be like the next Doink? Just use whatever Luchador available. The blue blazer to a lesser extent.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:31 PM
I wonder if Sin Cara will be like the next Doink? Just use whatever Luchador available. The blue blazer to a lesser extent.
I can sort of see that happening, as I'm not sure Hunico is going to fare any better than Mistico. The person behind the mask will likely become expendable, meaning we'll be treated to a revolving door of non-english-speaking burritos stuffed full of savory botches and delicious retakes.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:34 PM
Haha. Lawler's shooting all over McGillitunga tonight.

And yes, I realize how homoerotic that sounds.

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 09:39 PM
savory botches and delicious retakes.

Kofi has made a good career for himself doing just this ^^^

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:45 PM
Kofi has made a good career for himself doing just this ^^^
Kofi's the wrestling equivalent of a pulled pork sandwich from the gas station; he's all sorts of messy and only really digestible for those without distinguishing palettes.

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 09:50 PM
Kelly, Eve, and the Bellas. Wow, I never thought I would miss Laycool.

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 09:56 PM
I wonder if Making a WWE movie is actually a step down from making a straight to video movie for established actors?

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:57 PM
Yeah, I'm not a fan of the Bellas or Eve, but Kelly Kelly is particularly excruciating. She makes me wish I had a daughter just so I could snap the heads off of her dolls.

Bodom
08-29-2011, 09:58 PM
Mark is shaking his head because he knows hes taking the pin.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 09:59 PM
I wonder if Making a WWE movie is actually a step down from making a straight to video movie for established actors?
Judging by the caliber of actors that the WWE films seem to attract, I'm thinking they might actually be a step up. I mean, Ed Harris and Patricia Clarkson? You don't see them doing Seagal flicks.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 10:00 PM
Mark is shaking his head because he knows hes taking the pin.
Hahaha. Pretty much.

Androo
08-29-2011, 10:00 PM
OHHHH MYYYYYYYYY! Cena has Henry up for the AA!!!!!!!

CENA HAS THE STF LOCKED IN!!! WILL HENRY TAP? WILL HENRY TAP? WILL HENRY TAP?

Bodom
08-29-2011, 10:02 PM
Yeah, I'm not a fan of the Bellas or Eve, but Kelly Kelly is particularly excruciating. She makes me wish I had a daughter just so I could snap the heads off of her dolls.

Why are beth and nattie randomly dressing like hookers now?

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 10:03 PM
Christian is pretty crazy with that bronzer. I'm surprised that he doesn't leave an orange splat behind every time he gets planted on the mat.

Mint Berry Crunch
08-29-2011, 10:03 PM
Why are beth and nattie randomly dressing like hookers now?

They are all WWE Bimbo'd up. What the shitfuck.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 10:05 PM
Why are beth and nattie randomly dressing like hookers now?
Dude, I was totally wondering that last week and didn't say anything. They're raging against the Barbies by, um, dressing more like them? Um, what?

Also, the two of them really confuse my erections. Like, they're both actually attractive women, but I don't know what to make of all that muscle mass.

TheMadThinker
08-29-2011, 10:06 PM
Why are beth and nattie randomly dressing like hookers now?

I'm not complaining.

Bodom
08-29-2011, 10:09 PM
Dude, I was totally wondering that last week and didn't say anything. They're raging against the Barbies by, um, dressing more like them? Um, what?

Also, the two of them really confuse my erections. Like, they're both actually attractive women, but I don't know what to make of all that muscle mass.

Im not sure I like the idea of a woman being physically stronger than me. Than again. It would make sexy time interesting.

Bodom
08-29-2011, 10:10 PM
The CM Punk vs The Miz match was awesome(pun intended). I would love to see a feud between them after Punk is done with Nash.

Imagine the potential, epic promo's

Mint Berry Crunch
08-29-2011, 10:12 PM
Bodom you bastard.

Bodom
08-29-2011, 10:16 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xP80fLnDvRk

SilverGhost
08-29-2011, 10:16 PM
CM Punk>Miz

Bodom
08-29-2011, 10:18 PM
HHH wants a win over punk to promote his movie.

Androo
08-29-2011, 10:19 PM
Nash injured himself again in that, lil' 1 minute, run-in on Punk. So they had to completely change it in the same fucking night. LOLIPOPS

helmsley
08-29-2011, 10:20 PM
Triple H vs CM Punk? lol Alright!

unfortunatly it will end in DQ by nash interference

Necroyeti
08-29-2011, 10:21 PM
Bodom you bastard.
You just got Berried
(ba dum tschh)

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 10:27 PM
Im not sure I like the idea of a woman being physically stronger than me. Than again. It would make sexy time interesting.
I'm afraid I would be confused to the point where my penis would be half aroused and half terrified. In other words, my junk would look like Jim Ross, minus the hat.

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 10:28 PM
Nash injured himself again in that, lil' 1 minute, run-in on Punk. So they had to completely change it in the same fucking night. LOLIPOPS
Hahahahaha. I pray that's the real story behind it.

VanHooliganX
08-29-2011, 11:10 PM
Hahahahaha. I pray that's the real story behind it.

I thought I heard clicking on the way down :P

Iron Ape
08-29-2011, 11:14 PM
I thought I heard clicking on the way down :P
This is the third time tonight that someone has made me spit my beer on my screen.

*angrily shakes fist*


Seriously, though, Punk has been just straight up raping Nash with the mic over the last few weeks. And seeing Nash counter with a whole lot of nothing has been sort of surprising. I mean, didn't he used to be pretty good at lighting off some pipe-bombs of his own? What in the hell happened?

VanHooliganX
08-30-2011, 09:02 PM
This is the third time tonight that someone has made me spit my beer on my screen.

*angrily shakes fist*
Seriously, though, Punk has been just straight up raping Nash with the mic over the last few weeks. And seeing Nash counter with a whole lot of nothing has been sort of surprising. I mean, didn't he used to be pretty good at lighting off some pipe-bombs of his own? What in the hell happened?

Haha I apologise. Nothing worse than a wasted beer lol

Apparently Nash is injured so maybe walking does break him lol

Bodom
08-30-2011, 09:08 PM
Haha I apologise. Nothing worse than a wasted beer lol

Apparently Nash is injured so maybe walking does break him lol

Not sure if it's an injury, but it supposedly some sort of medical issue.

VanHooliganX
08-30-2011, 09:42 PM
Not sure if it's an injury, but it supposedly some sort of medical issue.

Ah right. Well we may hear him click in Hell in a Cell PPV at least :)

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:15 PM
Nash sending Nash a text made WWE cool again? Bwahahahahahahaha.

Lame.

They really need to quit making this shit up as they go.

Bodom
09-05-2011, 08:17 PM
Nash sending Nash a text made WWE cool again? Bwahahahahahahaha.

Lame.

They really need to quit making this shit up as they go.

They've been booking this angle on the fly ever since Punk won the title.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 08:17 PM
Nash sending Nash a text made WWE cool again? Bwahahahahahahaha.

Lame.

They really need to quit making this shit up as they go.

yeah, you beat me to it.

Bodom
09-05-2011, 08:19 PM
Nash just pulled a Matt Hardy. He had a big moment and cut one of the worst promo's of his career.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 08:20 PM
I like Nash, but I have to say he seems like a lost puppy since he returned to WWE.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:21 PM
They've been booking this angle on the fly ever since Punk won the title.
Boy, does it ever show.

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 08:22 PM
So you're supposed to make me believe that just ANYONE can get in the office of the COO of the WWE?

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:23 PM
Hahaha. Even the doors to the limo were locked. Big Lazy just can't get shit to go right anymore.

Bodom
09-05-2011, 08:24 PM
Boy, does it ever show.

With everything they've been blowing through, they could have easily stretched it out to Wrestlemania.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:25 PM
I like Nash, but I have to say he seems like a lost puppy since he returned to WWE.
There's a sort of kharmic justice in the way he's been brought back to just to be humiliated via weakass storylines, hilariously pointed pipe-bombs, and his own blanks that he's been firing on the mic. Dude should have just been content to stay home and cash those Legends checks.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 08:26 PM
Can anybody explain using Khali to get somebody over?

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 08:27 PM
Seriously? What did this storyline contribute?

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:28 PM
With everything they've been blowing through, they could have easily stretched it out to Wrestlemania.
Yeah, this all could have been something substantial, but instead of steak we got some of those microwaved meat scraps that they put on the bread at Subway.

Mtt08 xXx
09-05-2011, 08:29 PM
who would like to see an actual tag team storyline?

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 08:32 PM
Yeah, this all could have been something substantial, but instead of steak we got some of those microwaved meat scraps that they put on the bread at Subway.

It's like nobody had the balls to capitalize on punks new found success and give him a longer title run.

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 08:37 PM
Hm. That Divas match wasn't so bad.

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 08:38 PM
Nattie is just owning Kelly Kelly.

Funny stuff there.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:38 PM
It's like nobody had the balls to capitalize on punks new found success and give him a longer title run.
Yeah, they really had an opportunity to do something special with all of the momentum they had going, but it feels like they basically cockblocked themselves.

I've got a feeling that the next several weeks are just going to consist of more Just For Men jokes and talk of Haitch wearing his wife's underwear. A whole lot of screen time dedicated to a whole lot of nothing.

Androo
09-05-2011, 08:41 PM
Everything you three lads here been saying is spot-on with my sentiments. I woulda quoted everyone and wrote "^^^THIS" but nahhhh.

NASH HE GUNA GO N GET DA NWO N IT GNA BE KEWLL HE GONA CUM BAK N TRY N TAYK OVA THE WWE N HE GUNA WREK HAVOK IN DER IT GNA B AWSUM!!!!!!

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:41 PM
Nattie is just owning Kelly Kelly.
To be fair, Kelly Kelly sort of owns herself every time she opens her mouth.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 08:44 PM
Divas on commentary is always a train wreck.

Mtt08 xXx
09-05-2011, 08:45 PM
a wild Drew McIntyre appears...wild Drew McIntyre fled

Beutiful Chaos
09-05-2011, 08:47 PM
Oh yeah, advertise a movie about porn during a family show.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 08:47 PM
So Christian is going to start a six match losing streak with Cena now? Somebody up high really hates that guy.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:50 PM
Everything you three lads here been saying is spot-on with my sentiments. I woulda quoted everyone and wrote "^^^THIS" but nahhhh.

NASH HE GUNA GO N GET DA NWO N IT GNA BE KEWLL HE GONA CUM BAK N TRY N TAYK OVA THE WWE N HE GUNA WREK HAVOK IN DER IT GNA B AWSUM!!!!!!
And Punk is going to be really, really edgy and set off more ever so explosive *pipe-bombs.


*said pipe-bombs may bear a closer resemblance to m-60s and some varieties of sparklers by the time Survivor Series finally rolls around.

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 08:50 PM
Someone must have not had the heart to tell Miz how cheesy his suit looks.

Slacks
09-05-2011, 08:52 PM
lol miz's suit

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:53 PM
a wild Drew McIntyre appears...wild Drew McIntyre fled
They should just bring Shawn Michaels back to go all MacMillan River Adventures on Drew's career with a high-powered rifle.

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 08:54 PM
A squeaky what?

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 08:54 PM
Oh yeah, advertise a movie about porn during a family show.
I don't know- it kind of pairs nicely with how they've been butt-fucking their own storylines.

Androo
09-05-2011, 08:59 PM
Hahaha Ape-man!

Car door botch. Camera shot botch. Misplaced movie advertisement botch....AWW SHIT IT WASN'T A BOTCH, IT IS ACTUALLY A MOVIE THEY'RE SERIOUSLY RELEASING AND ADVERTISING!!

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:01 PM
Hahaha Ape-man!

Car door botch. Camera shot botch. Misplaced movie advertisement botch....AWW SHIT IT IS ACTUALLY A MOVIE THEY'RE SERIOUSLY RELEASING AND ADVERTISING!!
Finding out that shit is a Happy Madison production was like the least surprising news ever.

Brewer 314
09-05-2011, 09:08 PM
They've been booking this angle on the fly ever since Punk won the title.

And boy does it show!

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:10 PM
Anybody remember when Triple H wasn't around to suck up valuable air time? Good times.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:14 PM
Oh, snap. That WWE network thing is finally a thing.

Bodom
09-05-2011, 09:15 PM
Oh yeah, advertise a movie about porn during a family show.

The one Ricardo Rodriguez was in?

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 09:17 PM
Oh, snap. That WWE network thing is finally a thing.

I guess that is why they keep making bad movies. Good network filler content.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 09:20 PM
getting Otunga over will be prime entertainment for the long run.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:20 PM
I guess that is why they keep making bad movies. Good network filler content.
They need to make a 17-part miniseries follow-up/sequel to Cool as Ice starring Michael McGillicutty and his backwards hat.

TheMadThinker
09-05-2011, 09:27 PM
They need to make a 17-part miniseries follow-up/sequel to Cool as Ice starring Michael McGillicutty and his backwards hat.

I had to google that. Vanilla Ice in a movie? Wow... just wow.

BlazersDozen
09-05-2011, 09:32 PM
I'm in disbelief that they picked to go the route of Kevin Nash texting himself lol

Wow

Not only is he 7 feet tall & VERY recognizable back stage (you would think) but some how his slow, large, knee clicking ass snuck into the COO's office & text himself? And why doesn't Triple H have a screen lock.

It also feels weird that this old ass guy is being tech saavy in a storyline. I don't know anyone Nash's age who knows how to work a newer phone, much less text quickly...I doubt Nash even does in reality.

This totally killed the storyline for me & took it from great, to good, to "OMG WTF, this storyline is still alive? Lol"

Bodom
09-05-2011, 09:33 PM
I'm in disbelief that they picked to go the route of Kevin Nash texting himself lol

Wow

Not only is he 7 feet tall & VERY recognizable back stage (you would think) but some how his slow, large, knee clicking ass snuck into the COO's office & text himself? And why doesn't Triple H have a screen lock.

It also feels weird that this old ass guy is being tech saavy in a storyline. I don't know anyone Nash's age who knows how to work a newer phone, much less text quickly...I doubt Nash even does in reality.

This totally killed the storyline for me & took it from great, to good, to "OMG WTF, this storyline is still alive? Lol"

Nice knowing that WWE hasn't changed a bit.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:36 PM
Irelandspatriot just opened a vein.

Androo
09-05-2011, 09:41 PM
And I thought Gingeberg's epic winning streak was gonna start tonight. What do I know, eh?

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:45 PM
I'm in disbelief that they picked to go the route of Kevin Nash texting himself lol

Wow

Not only is he 7 feet tall & VERY recognizable back stage (you would think) but some how his slow, large, knee clicking ass snuck into the COO's office & text himself? And why doesn't Triple H have a screen lock.

It also feels weird that this old ass guy is being tech saavy in a storyline. I don't know anyone Nash's age who knows how to work a newer phone, much less text quickly...I doubt Nash even does in reality.

This totally killed the storyline for me & took it from great, to good, to "OMG WTF, this storyline is still alive? Lol"

Here's a copy of the text in its entirety:


Hey Big Sexxy I need u to stick the winnner of the Punk/Seena match. And NOT in a gay way. Just do that one awsome move that you do. U r a hard worker, not at all lazy, and u draw tons of $$$. Also ur hair color looks totaly natural and the womens cannot resist u. -Signed Paul Levasomething

(P.S. Kevin Nash totally did not send himself this text)

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 09:46 PM
And I thought Gingeberg's epic winning streak was gonna start tonight. What do I know, eh?
That entrance music has Hall of Famer written all over it.

K2Jelly
09-05-2011, 09:55 PM
Hmmmmm. Teddy Long creating a tag team match between a conveniently even number of heels and faces? What're the odds?

Beutiful Chaos
09-05-2011, 10:11 PM
Hmmmmm. Teddy Long creating a tag team match between a conveniently even number of heels and faces? What're the odds?

I called that out as soon as Rye Bread came out.

Tomsta666
09-05-2011, 10:17 PM
Highlight of the night? Zack Ryder burying Mcgillitunga. WooWooWoo.

Iron Ape
09-05-2011, 10:21 PM
I love/hate how Teddy Long sounds like an old white man trying to impersonate what he thinks a black person probably sounds like.

VanHooliganX
09-06-2011, 02:47 AM
I love/hate how Teddy Long sounds like an old white man trying to impersonate what he thinks a black person probably sounds like.

Whenever I see him I always think orderlys are going to put a blanket around him and take him back to the home he escaped from, spurting "Holla holla holla" on the way out.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 07:34 PM
Everybody ready for another night of Punk concerning himself with Triple H's underwear situation?

*gets pumped*

Bodom
09-12-2011, 07:40 PM
I predict an X-Pac sighting.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 08:08 PM
I wonder if Bret and Cena buy jorts from the same place?

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:09 PM
I predict an X-Pac sighting.
Seriously? Could be cool.

I couldn't stand X-Pac growing up, but I've really come around on the guy as of late. Aside from the shoot with him and Nash crying and killing each others' buzzes, I generally enjoy his videos where he shares his various feelings and insights on industry goings-ons and such. Yeah, he can be a little slow and a bit of a chore to listen to at times, but his passion and enthusiasm for the industry really come across strong and you can tell that the industry isn't all about the money for him (which is more than I can say for his fellow 7ft. tall jerker of tears).

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:10 PM
I wonder if Bret and Cena buy jorts from the same place?
Hahahahaha.

K2Jelly
09-12-2011, 08:20 PM
Orton v. Rhodes again?

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:24 PM
Heh. A-Ri's finisher was my finisher back when I yard-tarded in highschool.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 08:25 PM
Orton v. Rhodes again?

They had a great match at Smackdown. I look forward to seeing it again.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:27 PM
The Miz and Troof bro-mance makes for quality television.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 08:35 PM
Say what you want about Kofi's wrestling he can jump really high. Give him that Sin Cara trampoline and you might really have something.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:36 PM
If the WWE were serious about doing something worthwhile with Coffee 'n Cream, they should have created a special graphics package for their entrance and given them a custom theme (by, like, Skindred or some other similarly silly band).

Androo
09-12-2011, 08:39 PM
Seriously? Could be cool.

I couldn't stand X-Pac growing up, but I've really come around on the guy as of late. Aside from the shoot with him and Nash crying and killing each others' buzzes, I generally enjoy his videos where he shares his various feelings and insights on industry goings-ons and such. Yeah, he can be a little slow and a bit of a chore to listen to at times, but his passion and enthusiasm for the industry really come across strong and you can tell that the industry isn't all about the money for him (which is more than I can say for his fellow 7ft. tall jerker of tears).

That's what I thought about them aswell. It's, like, if he's with Nash, and others, he turns into something else. On his own it felt as if he was free of "be cool, fuck it, who gives a fuck?" restrictions.

K2Jelly
09-12-2011, 08:41 PM
Who else finds the way that the Miz prepares to hit the SCF hilarious.

KJ PUNK
09-12-2011, 08:42 PM
This is the best named thread in all of the EWN.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:42 PM
Say what you want about Kofi's wrestling he can jump really high. Give him that Sin Cara trampoline and you might really have something.
They should put him in a mask and give him some kind of African Jumping Bean gimmick.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 08:48 PM
They should put him in a mask and give him some kind of African Jumping Bean gimmick.

Maybe that is what the ridiculous logo on his gear represents.

eyehatecena
09-12-2011, 08:51 PM
oh good, orton(smackdowns cena) on tv twice in a week for now on. can't wait to see him win once again. They should give Rhodes the win.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:52 PM
That's what I thought about them aswell. It's, like, if he's with Nash, and others, he turns into something else. On his own it felt as if he was free of "be cool, fuck it, who gives a fuck?" restrictions.
Some people's friends bring out the absolute worst in them; with The Clique, they all just seemed to bring out the worst in each other (like a knitting-club for assholes).

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:53 PM
This is the best named thread in all of the EWN.
I'm just pissed that I couldn't come up with a way to work a Donkey Kong Country reference in.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 08:54 PM
Maybe that is what the ridiculous logo on his gear represents.
I would bet lots of someone else's money on it.

Androo
09-12-2011, 09:08 PM
Well atleast Bret Hart had the STUBSTANCE to only stumble over his script tonight, and not his 1 minute walking in the ring.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 09:09 PM
Watching Bret Hart slap the sharp-shooter on somebody is akin to somebody's once-hot grandmother whipping a tit out at the waffle house; it's awkward as fuck and you just try not to look.

KJ PUNK
09-12-2011, 09:14 PM
I'm just pissed that I couldn't come up with a way to work a Donkey Kong Country reference in.

How about Ape's RAW peel (and other barrell bustin' fun!)?

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 09:19 PM
How about Ape's RAW peel (and other barrell bustin' fun!)?
That would have worked.

Bodom
09-12-2011, 09:20 PM
That would have worked.

You have the power to do this now.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 09:25 PM
I bet Hugh Jackman will be one of the better guest hosts.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 09:25 PM
You have the power to do this now.
Yeah, I'm fine with leaving it, though. I was just joking about the Donkey Kong Country reference.

Bodom
09-12-2011, 09:28 PM
I bet Hugh Jackman will be one of the better guest hosts.

I like how they're not advertising him as a guest host.

Androo
09-12-2011, 09:32 PM
Right, other than Orton - Rhodes, and little Henry promo, who have we actually seen from Smackdown? I thought it's meant to be a Supershow? And I thought the whole point of the Supershow was to see different, new things, what's the point of doing the same match we had on Smackdown past? They're not even feuding either.

Although, I do call a Ted DiBiase appearance of some sorts, to setup an IC Title match at NOC. Or that could be on Smackdown.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 09:32 PM
I like how they're not advertising him as a guest host.

I would like to see him insult the Bellas since they are officially evil now and they use to be the guest host arm candy.

Bodom
09-12-2011, 09:33 PM
I hope Hugh Jackman does only pre tapes to show how little Hollywood likes the WWE.

Bodom
09-12-2011, 09:34 PM
Right, other than Orton - Rhodes, and little Henry promo, who have we actually seen from Smackdown? I thought it's meant to be a Supershow? And I thought the whole point of the Supershow was to see different, new things, what's the point of doing the same match we had on Smackdown past? They're not even feuding either.

Although, I do call a Ted DiBiase appearance of some sorts, to setup an IC Title match at NOC. Or that could be on Smackdown.

If every show is a super show, is it even super anymore?

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 09:41 PM
I hope Hugh Jackman does only pre tapes to show how little Hollywood likes the WWE.
I hope they just show his Real Steel robot and then use some pre-recorded voice snippets that he literally phoned in from his cellular.


EDIT:
"Hey, everybody! Hugh Jackman here! I'm a big fan of WWF Champion Hulk Hogan and I love the entire WWF Galax...err, Universe! Been watching since I was a show-tune loving heterosexual boy in Australia!"

Bodom
09-12-2011, 09:43 PM
I hope they just show his Real Steel robot and then use some pre-recorded voice snippets that he literally phoned in from his cellular.

With Santino dressed as Wolverine.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 09:47 PM
Punk better have some new material this week beyond pipe bombs and panties.

Androo
09-12-2011, 09:48 PM
Well I was wrong. As Randy would say to Kofi; I was STOOOOPID STOOOPID STOOPID! How did I ever think an IC Title storyline would have prominance in a Raw final match, when Randy, Henry and the WHC are involved? SToopID!!

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 09:48 PM
Nice to see Rhodes get a big win over Orton. That really made him look like a big time main eventer.

Yeah, it is about time.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 09:51 PM
Punk better have some new material this week beyond pipe bombs and panties.
My sources backstage have indicated to me that he spent the entire afternoon working on a Steph insult that involves the phrase "stupid McDumbface". Twitter is going to explode from all of the edginess.

Androo
09-12-2011, 09:51 PM
I wonder what else is going to suddenly change in this, on the fly?

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 09:54 PM
My sources backstage have indicated to me that he spent the entire afternoon working on a Steph insult that involves the phrase "stupid McDumbface". Twitter is going to explode from all of the edginess.

He will need to reach deep into the Chris Jericho archive.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 09:57 PM
Alright, the jab about the bodybuilder fetish was good stuff. Then again, so was the retort.

Bodom
09-12-2011, 10:00 PM
My sources backstage have indicated to me that he spent the entire afternoon working on a Steph insult that involves the phrase "stupid McDumbface". Twitter is going to explode from all of the edginess.

#McDumbface is trending as we speak

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 10:01 PM
#McDumbface is trending as we speak
Hahahahahaha.

TheMadThinker
09-12-2011, 10:04 PM
#McDumbface is trending as we speak

So are Steph's panties, but everybody has seen those.

Iron Ape
09-12-2011, 10:08 PM
Punk totally dropped the F-bomb.